Its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, disorder at the border. Plus, stephen welcomes zendaya and Julian Edelman featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen thank you very much. Welcome to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. cheers and applause huge, huge, news just this afternoon. While were in the middle of a humanitarian crisis on our border detention facilities, this afternoon, we learned that customs and Border Protection commissioner, john sanders, is expected to step down. You know what they say, when the going gets tough, the tough go, good luck with that. Sucks to be you. laughter applause cheers youve got to blur my whole head. In his resignation email, sanders didnt explain the reasons for his departure. Hmm, what could they be . Hmmm. Hmmmm laughter i certainly hope he didnt lose his job over something as minor as running Detention Centers that are inhumane, worse than jail, in which, young detainees have no access to toothbrushes, toothpaste or soap. booing wow, his next Job Interview is going to be rough okay, john, under special skills, it says, violating the geneva conventions. okay, im sorry, youre just not chuck e. Cheese material. And may i remind you, and we terrify children with a giant, animatronic rat. laughter trump spoke to reporters in the oval office this afternoon, and he denied that he asked sanders to resign. I didnt speak to him. I dont think ive ever spoken to him, actually. No, we have some very good people running it and, you know, i dont know anything about it. I hear he is a very good man, a good person. I dont know him. I dont think i ever spoke to him. Stephen as trump hes a good man, hes a good man, great man. Never spoke to him. This whole thing was his idea. Hes a monster. We should try him at the hague. I guess. I dont know. Ive never met him. Do we have am i clear on that . I dont spiders, spiders, spiders. He also made mouth sounds with the hole about his concern for children. A lot of these Young Children come from places that you dont want to know about. The way they have lived and been the way that the poverty they grew up in. Stephen as trump which is why, just to make them feel at home, we thoughtfully provide them squalor. laughter mi squalor es su squalor. But as terrible as the conditions in his Detention Center are, trump believes we have no choice. You have these massive numbers of people trying to get into the United States because of the economy, because we have done so good. But thats one of the problems with doing well everybody wants to come in. Ten years ago, five years ago, four years ago, they didnt want to come in. Today, they want to come in. But we cant let that happen. Stephen as trump we cant let that happen. Its just like the poem on the statue of liberty you touch my cash, this big bronze bitch will stomp your huddled mass. okay. Jon i dont recall reading g that. Stephen the second verse. Thats the second verse. But trump is wrong, and he knows it. This crisis is not some mistake caused by a sudden rush to the border. People who work down there say its a result of a failed gamble on the part of the Trump Administration that a succession of everharsher border policies would deter the flood of migrants coming from central america. And its not trumps only failed gamble. His original idea for the border was the trump Taj Matrocity and child hotel. You know, you know you know, the fourth of july is next weeks, folks, and im happy to say i love our country. I love america. I believe in my heart of hearts, our great country is the last, best hope for all mankind. And what makes us great is what we believe in all men are created equal. Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Charmin cheers and applause charmin enjoy the go but heres the problem with high ideals you actually have to live up to them. And with these kids on the border, were not just failing to live up to our own standards. Michael scott moore, a journalist abducted by somali pirates, tweeted, somali pirates gave me toothpaste and soap. applause david rohde applause david rohde, a journalist taken by the taliban, saw that and replied, the taliban gave me toothpaste and soap. Even silence of the lambs buffalo bill tweeted, at least i gave my prisoner lotion and a basket. cheers and applause true story. True story. True story. But trump has a courageous defense of his policies. as trump those arent my policies. Because heres what he told chuck todd on sunday separation, president obama, i took over separation. This has been happening long before i got there. What weve done is weve created weve weve ended separation. You know, under president obama, you had separation. I was the one that ended it. Stephen longtime viewers of reality wont be surprised that donald trump is lying there, because politifact found that family separations were rare during the obama and bush administrations and became systematic under trumps zerotolerance policy. Mr. President booing youre not fooling anybody. We all remember that you ran on a racist, antiimmigration platform, and youre still running on it. At this point, the only family the only family separation america wants to see is yours from the white house. cheers and applause audience Stephen StephenStephen Stephen stephen plus, trumps deterrence policy might be having the exact opposite effect, because according to a former ambassador, smugglers are telling migrants, they may shut the border. Trump is getting tougher. If you dont go now, youll never get in. Basically, these coyotes are saying america is being put in the disney vault. You dont actually want five copies of the little mermaid, but if you dont buy it now, you might never own five copies. laughter trump does have his defenders, like the friendly defernders over at fox defrienders. It is just amazing that these news outlets seem about to be on the same page of the democratic talking points. What they say on sunday all of the sudden is parroted and featured on monday and tuesday. And it is look at how bad these conditions are for kids at the border. Keep in mind you dont the Border Patrol wasnt in charge of building a marriott or a hyatt. Stephen wow, hyatt and marriott must really appreciate that. laughter in fact, marriott just changed their slogan to marriott we have soap laughter applause thats a selling point. Its a luxury. Its a luxury. Water, beds, warmth. And i just gotta say, brian kilmeade, pump the brakes my friend. Is that really where you want to draw a distinction between the two Political Parties . as kilmeade before you walk into that voting booth and pull the lever for a democrat, just remember they want to give soap to children. Now, im off to drink myself to sleep. Let the darkness swallow me. What have i become . laughter applause now cheers this next story is a real toe tapper. Tensions between trump and iran continue to escalate, and ill tell you all about it in our unfortunately ongoing series last week, iran shot down an american drone. In response, trump ordered a military strike, but then called off the strike at the last minute. Instead, he decided to impose new sanctions on irans Supreme Leader. The assets of Ayatollah Khomeini and his office will not be spared from the sanctions. Stephen a harsh response, with one small issue the Supreme Leader is ayatollah khamenei. Ayatollah khomeini has been dead since 1989. True, true. applause as trump were bringing sanctions against ayatollah khomenei, as well as Ottoman Emperor suleiman the magnificent, and the cruel pharaoh ramses ii, with all his conniving viziers and eunuchs. Let my people go. laughter also, while sitting there in the oval, trump was asked about what the goals of any war with iran would be. Do you have an exit strategy for iran if war does break out . Uh, you arent going to need an exit strategy. I dont need exit strategies. Stephen as trump i mean, our troops will need one, but not me. Ill be fine, what with the bone spurs and everything. Over the weekend, columnist e. Jean carroll accused donald trump of sexually assaulting her 23 years ago in a Bergdorf Goodman dressing room. And yesterday, trump gave a very very bad reason why hes innocent, telling a reporter, ill say it with Great Respect number one, shes not my type. Number two, it never happened. It never happened, okay . So, it didnt happen because shes not his type. That is the sound of a man realizing in midsentence that hes not talking to billy bush. laughter this story didnt get a lot of coverage when it first broke. For example, the new york times, originally buried the story in the books section. Which is smart they knew it was the one place the president would never look. Then, then applause then theres our friends at the new york post, which ran a story about post, which ran a story about e. Jean carroll, that was mysteriously scrubbed from the tabloids website on friday afternoon. Nobody knew what happened to the link until today, when it was revealed that the post editor is a supporter of President Trump and ordered the removal of the story. booing so they deleted the article to protect trump. If the post had a headline about itself it would be propagandon post plays defense for sex crime. So its gone. Its gone now. And if you click on the link now, it just goes to a page that says, 404 error integrity not found. cheers and applause weve got a great show for you tonight. Zendaya is here. But when we return, knitting news stick around the good news . Our comfort lasts all day. The bad news . So does his energy. New depend® fitflex underwear offers your best comfort and protection guaranteed. Because, perfect or not, lifes better when youre in it. Be there with depend®. Tthe bad news . Ouyour patience might not. Ay. New depend® fitflex underwear offers your best comfort and protection guaranteed. Because, perfect or not, lifes better when youre in it. Be there with depend®. Not ecan match the power of energizer. Tery because energizer ultimate lithium is the longest lasting aa battery in the world. [confetti cannon popping] energizer. Backed by science. Matched by no one. What would i say to somebody living with hiv . Keep being you. Keep loving. Keep aspiring. Keep striving. And ask your doctor about biktarvy. Biktarvy is a complete onepill, onceaday treatment used for hiv in certain adults. Its not a cure, but with one small pill, biktarvy fights hiv with three different medicines to help you get to undetectable. That means the amount of virus is so low it cant be measured in lab tests. So keep pushing. Keep creating. And keep pouring your soul into everything you do. Serious side effects can occur, including kidney problems and kidney failure. Rare, lifethreatening side effects include a buildup of lactic acid and liver problems. Do not take biktarvy if you take dofetilide or rifampin. Tell your doctor about all the medicines and supplements you take, if you are pregnant or breastfeeding, or if you have kidney or liver problems, including hepatitis. If you have hepatitis b, do not stop taking biktarvy without talking to your doctor. Common side effects were diarrhea, nausea, and headache. If youre hivpositive, keep loving who you are, inside and out. Ask your doctor if biktarvy is right for you. Ask your doctor if biktarvy is right for you. Whatever youre craving. And whenever youre craving it. Doordash has the restaurants you want. Delivered to your door. Wherever your door happens to be. Download doordash. The most restaurants across america. First order, 0 delivery fee. Milland zero grams of sugar. Eat taste with only 96 calories so when ones done, its the perfect time to start another. Miller lite. Hold true. Ive been waiting my whole life for this. cheers and applause stephen give it up for the band, everybody wow. Come on cheers and applause that was a musical fantasia. Jon yeah, yeah, yeah. Stephen wow, that was a journey, jon. Jon yes, indeed. Stephen jon we have the lovely and talented zendaya is on the show tonight. Jon yes, indeed, great, great cheers and applause . Stephen and im very excited because tomorrow, wednesday and thursday, we will be live here broadcasting from the ed sullivan theater following the first democratic debates of the 2020 campaign. cheers and applause . Jon oh, my goodness. Theres going to be a lot to talk about. Stephen it will be huge . A. There will be a lot to talkb. Stephen its the kickoff. The games of 2020. The kickoff will be tomorrow night right here on the show. Thats where it starts. The presidency goes through this theater, ladies and gentlemen. You know thats not actually true. Thats not thats not actually true. laughter you know, folks, theres some big news in the world of crafting. And, yes, i know i talk a lot about crafting. A lot of people say my show really took off in 2016 when i started focusing on crafting. Well, todays crafting dustup concerns the online knitting community ravelry, which jus cheers and applause oh, weve got some weve got some ravelheads here today . Ravelry Just Announced that they are banning support of donald trump and his administration, explaining we cannot provide a space that is inclusive of all and also allow support for open White Supremacy. I gotta say bold. Bold. It was the right thing to do. But it this was hard news for the white supremacist knitting collective, neoknitzis. cheers and applause turns out, hate speech and intolerance had gotten out of hand on ravelrys forums. Before the site was invaded by trump supporters, one ravelry user described the community as a happy little bubble. But you knew it had to burst. I mean, for petes sake, you all run around with those pointy needles all the time. As you might imagine, ravelrys new policies didnt go unchallenged. In fact, they led to a swift reaction from the knitting world. Thats situation a lot swift reaction because this is the same group of people that take seven months to make a lumpy baby bonnet. One ravelry user was so upset by the ban on trump supporters, they posted, kill yourselves. Wow, that is a bit more violent than i would have expected from someone who knits. as grandma well, its a complicated issue, but, you know, i think you know what i think would be simple . You could all kill yourselves. laughter applause now who wants a lemon square . laughter but other ravelry users were supportive of the move, saying that theyve never been prouder to be part of this community. And to these noble knitters, i say, good for you. Dont ever let hate speech stop you from making those toolong or tooshort scarves where you change color halfway through because you ran out of your first yarn. Where would we be as a nation if we didnt have your handmade socks that are too big to wear with shoes but too thin to wear as slippers, so you just sort of shuffle around the house collecting dust and hair in them until christmas is over and you can go back to regular socks. Take a stand against White Supremacy with the same passion you take a stand against that cashier at Joann Fabrics who tells you your coupon isnt good for seasonal yarn. Face the tyranny head on with the confidence of someone who starts working on a secret santa present in february because, damn it thats how long its going to take because youre not just knitting the fabric thats too scratchy to wear on a cold day and too smelly to wear on a wet one. Youre knitting the fabric of america. Well be right back with zendaya. applause until a month ago you were a complete failure. But now. Mr. Jack malik. Youre the biggest star in the world. As if by magic. Somehow im the only one that remembers the beatles. [ hey jude by the beatles ] no ones ever written this many great songs. Howd you do it . Sometimes it feels like someone else has written all the songs. Critics declare. Openturning 50 opens theuard. Door to a lot of new things. 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This is nissan intelligent mobility. band playing cheers and applause stephen welcome back, everybody folks, you know my first guest this evening from spiderman homecoming and the greatest showman. She now stars in the new hbo series, euphoria. You have to understand that i didnt want you to be safe okay. I just dont want anything bad to happen to you. And, you know, you just cant be mad at me for wanting you to be okay. Im being anxious, you know. It hurts my heart too much. And. I im not mad at you. Youre the best thing thats happened to me in a really long time, and i just dont want anything bad to happen so just, please, dont be mad at me, okay . Im sorry. Stephen please welcome, zendaya applause stephen hello. Hello. Stephen so happy to have you on. Nice to meet you. Nice to meet you, too. Stephen we had your we had your costar from spiderman homecoming, mr. Tom holland was on last night. Yes, you did. And he got puppies. Stephen he got puppies. He got to play with puppy. Do we have any leftover puppy. They all get adopted. I can accept that. Stephen tom got adopted. Because hes so puppylike. We were talking about spiderman far from home. Do you do any stunts . Do you have to get on the wire . Its mostly tom. I let him handle that. Stephen does m. J. Get pul