Tonight, america is slow plus stephen welcomes dr. Sanjay gupta, featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause theme song playing stephen Whoo Whoo Whoo whoo whoohoo Whoo Whoo Whoo oh, my god whoo oh, my goodness oh, i should not be this tired hey, everybody thank you please, sit down jon, good to see you. Jon yes from a distance. Stephen joe, happy thursday. Welcome to the late show. Im your host Stephen Colbert. cheers and applause huhoh, huhoh. piano riff as you may have noticed, none of you are here right now. Only people in the audience give a shot of this only people in the audience are some members of my staff. Hi, guys. cheering im going to sit down over here. Okay. piano riff how are you, jon . Jon im good. Stephen good. Yeah, me, too. Jon how are you . Stephen im very excited to be doing a show tonight. Jon i actually dont know how i am. Stephen what do you mean . Jon well, you know, the virus, i dont have symptoms. Stephen exactly. Jon which is the reason we dont have an audience. Stephen because we dont know whats going on. Two things to keep in mind, you dont want to be part of the hysteria. Jon right. Stephen but you also want to act with an abundance of caution. Jon thats right. Stephen we dont know on this side of it. We kind of know how much hysteria we could produce if we wanted to. Jon right. Stephen we dont know if this is a feather or a brick. Jon right. Stephen around the world, this seems to be a brick, so we went with brick. There you go. piano riff hows the show going so far . Jon its moving. laughter stephen let me explain whats going on. All the new york city late night shows are planning to go without audiences starting monday. We announced that last night, actually. That changed because, just a few hours ago, we got some surprising news, we would be going without an audience starting tonight. This is absolutely true. Were just kind of winging it. This is rehearsal right now, which might be a good thing, because, in my mind, all of my jokes are perfect. The only person that ever disagrees with me is the audience. Cant disagree with me now, can you . laughter ha look, i just got a laugh laughter ive done a show without an audience before, back before the late show started, we did a secret show in a small Michigan Town called monroe, michigan. There was so much scrutiny on our first show that we decided to get out of up to and get the show out of the way by taking over a Public Access m called only on monroe. Im sure you saw it. It was sort of gorilla marketing. I tonight say viral marketing because we will never be using that phrase again. Jon yeah. laughter stephen heres something the most breaking news for me is when i learned that, because to have the coronavirus, all of broadway was shutting down tonight. Thats another reason we dont have an audience. Its a little sad because the broadway shows had already been working on new precautions to keep the audience safe. Heres footage from last nights rehearsal of westside story. Oh i need some purelle laughter oh, man. Stephen right now, im imagining your laughter. Jon yeah. Stephen last night, we learned that the n. B. A. Has suspended its season until further notice, so congratulations to the new york knicks, its the best thing to happen to them all year piano riff laughter jon get a sip in stephen you know what i watched today . Jon whats that . Stephen i watched steve stlen, you know, the guy who started the original tonight show at the hudson theater down the street. After that, there was the steve allen show. He was playing piano while jack karoak read selections from on the road. Thats what these shows used to be. Jon wow. Stephen and can be again, thanks to coronavirus. applause if all that news wasnt unsettling enough, last night we also learned tom hanks has the coronavirus. Hey coronavirus okay, yeah you can shut down italy, you can shut down south korea, you can destroy our economy, but keep your filthy nucleocapsid proteins off tom hanks the man is an american treasure this is like learning the liberty bell has herpes laughter it ends now it ends now laughter im being told it is not ending now. Im going to have to keep doing the show without an audience. laughter okay, now, moving on. Jon for rest, come on, forrest. Stephen i think this is going pretty well. Do you guys think its going pretty well . cheers and applause jon yeah, i think so stephen now, i want you to forget cheering thats enough. piano riff i want you to forget the fact that i pay all those people. laughter now, even though tom hanks and wife rita wilson both tested positive, they say they have mild symptoms and are doing fine. Hanks posted, with poise, i might add, as harvetion always dose, about how theyre handling the problem. Well, now, what to do next, we hanks will be tested and isolated as long as Public Safety requires. Not much more to it than a one day at a time approach. No . Take care of yourselves. Hanx. Positive message but a bummer of a sequel to catch me if you can. Jon wow. Wow. Stephen im guess weg put a graphic up there that would say catch me if you can, at some point. In a real show, we would do that. This is rehearsal. Stephen this is rehearsal. But im thinking this is what we actually show people. Sure. Jon huhoh. Stephen theyre going to be really surprised when i walk out of the building in half an hour. laughter piano riff oh, sure, stephen, well tape the rehearsal. See ya suckers jon wash that hand wash that hand hold on. Stephen what am i thinking. Jon got to be ready and stay vigilant. Stephen last night donald trump preempted all programming to address a worried nation and remind them hes the thing they should really worry about. We will be suspending all travel from europe to the United States for the next 30 days. These prohibitions will not only apply to the tremendous amount of trade and cargo, but various other things, as we get approval. Stephen people ban doesnt seem to make much sense as one former department of Homeland Security official put it, the virus is here in the u. S. , the focus needs to be on taking action here, treating people an. This seems to be pointless. The virus is already here. Its like in a horror movie, somebody hearing the killer is already inside the house and responding with, oh, no, i better go lock all the doors, then ill leave this axe on the bathroom sink as i take a shower, la, la, la, honey, is that you . Come on in loo, loo im all soapy ive got my eyes closed so i cant read the script is it over in its over. When wall street heard all trade was being suspend they did freaked out. Heres a picture of dow futures from the moment trumps speech started to one hour later. I dont know much about finance but i do know the rule, line go down, pants go brown. Okay . E. F. Hutton said that originally. Jon oh, yeah . Thats why people would listen. Ask your grandparents about that reference. When e. F. Hutton talks, people listen. Thats right. I believe they are ash can at this point. An hour after his speech trump leapt on twitter to correct himself please remember, very important for all countries and businesses to know that trade will in no way be affected by the 30day restriction on travel from europe. The restriction stops people, not goods. Please remember, very important for all countries and businesses to know, nothing i say is true, pay no attention to the man behind the bronzer. laughter a nights sleep did not make the markets feel any better about trumps performance because right after the opening bell the dow dropped 700 points tripping automatic circuit brearkz to halt trading. I wish life that did aut jon f. Stephen what am i supposed to do . No more purelle. Im hoping to drink enough of this i sweat out the sterilizing. Jon mmhmm. piano riff john, you dont drink at all. Jon no. Stephen you dont drink at all. Jon no. Stephen how do you calm down . Jon music. Stephen okay. Jon you know. Stephen but i dont know how to play a piano. Jon you can listen to music. Stephen try me out. You play something, ill have a sip of bourbon and compare the calming effect. Jon okay. Stephen so ready, go. laughter stephen you can stop now. piano riff laughter one of the things that had to freak out wall street was trumps body language. He had a rakish flair that can only be described as stark terror. Not so much deer in the head lights as deer in the oval office. Aaahhh aaahhh aaahhh aahhh oh, snap. No, dont follow me aaahhh laughter stephen ive had a little too much of this stuff over here. Because it was a trump speech, words not do good. For instance, he gets a little tripped up here. I am confident by counting and continuing to take these tough measures stephen not very reassuring when the guy telling us to stay calm about a respiratory virus loses his breath in the middle of a twosyllable word. as trump im your pres ident. Trumps remarks on camera were a disaster and his off camera marks. A moment before the speech, unaware the camera was rolling. Do you like the book being on the desk or not . Or would you rather have it not be. Have it there just in case. Maybe it looks better. Gives you something up here. Right . Does it matter . Stephen way to have the right priorities. This is like that famous churchill speechch we shall fight them on the beaches, we shall fight them on the landing ground. Do you like my hair slick pusard . Does it matter . Either way, im a smoke show laughter jon hmm. Stephen but the fun didnt stop there because after he finished, the cameras kept rolling. Okay. laughter jon wow. Stephen yeah. Wow, indeed. Jon thats where were at. Stephen thats where were at. That is not what you want to hear attend of an important speech. And thats why i know theyre going to have a long, happy life together. To karen and jon okaaaaaay. laughter i give it a year tops piano riff uh, weve got to take a break, but stick around. When we come back, more of whatever this is. Right . cheers and applause band playing hey allergy muddlers. Achoo . Do your sneezes turn heads . Try zyrtec. It starts working hard at hour one. And works twice as hard when you take it again the next day. Zyrtec muddle no more. Im the founder of the honey pot. My name is beatrice dixon. To have a retailer like target see you and believe in you, is everything. The reason why its so important for honey pot to do well is so the next black girl she could have a better opportunity. That means a lot to me. worried im not picking it up. You pick it up im not picking it up ill pick it up theyre clean raps cuz my hineys clean. Oh yeah im charmin clean. Charmin ultra strong just cleans better. Enjoy the go with charmin. Xy s20 5g has arrived at sprint and its 5g ready. With a revolutionary camera you can capture video and multiple pictures with one tap get it for just 0 a month. Its 5g ready for people with hearing loss, visit sprintrelay. Com. [ natural drums and [ music begins to build ]] [ drums beat faster ] introducing an unlimited coffee subscription for 8. 99 a month. At panera, your cup is always full. Gewith an extra 15 off. E savings save on womens tops. Mens dress apparel. And sonoma bath towels are just 7. 64 plus, take 10 off your mens or womens style event purchase of 50 or more. Plus get kohls cash right now. cheers and applause band playing stephen everybody, welcome back jon batiste and stay human, everybody give it up for the band right there so the speech was a disaster a disaster but today trump got a doover in televised meeting with irish leader Leo Varadkar Varadkar bow before varadkar ill tell you all about it in tonights episode of chair chat trump started by explaining that due to viral concerns he and leo varadkar didnt shake hands. We didnt shake hands today and we looked at each other, we said, what are we going to do . You know, sort of a weird feeling. We said it at the same time. We did this. You know, i just got back from india, and i didnt shake any hands there, and it was very easy because they go like this, and japan goes like this. They were ahead of the curve. Stephen its strange, bowing like that in india or japan is the respectful thing to do but seems like when trump does it, its a hate crime. laughter trump continued to insist he could never have seen this thing what everybody saw coming coming. What we did in europe, this was the time. China, a lot of it came from when you when you think of what happened to europe because it was very fast and very furious stephen it was fast, and furious, some might even say too fast, too furious. It started in asia but then, of course, we all saw the tokyo drift. Do do we know the fate to have the furious . Do we know that yet . The fate of the furious . No, but we do know, as vin diesel says, its all about family. laughter hobbs and shaw. laughter piano riff never seen one of those movies. I should see all of them. I want to see all of those movies. Jon mmhmm. inaudible . Stephen i want to see all of those movies, because i think to truly understand this country that i love, i need to see the most successful decology ever made. Nine will be the tenth . Because eight was actually the ninth because hobbs and shaw is canon . Dont fight, just give me an answer. Is hobbs and shaw canon . Yes. Stephen so thats the ninth. So the eighth is the ninth. The ninth is the tenth. But heres what im say and give me a shot at chris. Give me a shot at chris right now, bleep da damn it youre a cameraman how do you know that doesnt help jon aaahhh piano riff stephen i am telling you, what is happening right now is the future of this Television Show you think im not leaving in half an hour, youre crazy im rather enjoying this right now. Are you having a good time . Yes. Stephen okay. Have you had any of this . laughter because i have, and ive got to tell ya, i feel like a child again. piano riff making mud pies, man, anythings possible. Jon yeah, thats right. 38 minutes. Stephen 38 minutes . Weve almost got a full show right here. Tom yeah stephen what do you think . Anything here . Can you use any of this . I can use some of it, sure stephen weve got 38 minutes not 38 minutesworth. Stephen no, how much do we need of the 38 minutes that ive talked so far, how much do we need . 14. Stephen weve got 14 minutes come on, theres 14 minutes here how much are we burning now . This has to be a full minute of me asking you this. Its going to be cut. laughter piano riff stephen tom purcel and chris, everybody cheers and applause piano riff whoo whoo its a good thing trump seems so unworried about coronavirus because a senior brazilian Government Official who visited maralago days ago and was in close proximity to donald trump and mike pence has tested positive for coronavirus. The white house says trump and pence had almost no interactions with the brazilian secretary who tested positive for coronavirus after his maralago visit and do not require to be tested at this time. A big difference between almost no intersections and intersections. What do you mean shes pregnant . I had almost no sex with her laughter well be right back with dr. Sanjay gupta cheers and applause band playing now theres new powerwash dish spray. Its the faster way to clean as you go. Just spray, wipe and rinse. It cleans grease five times faster. New dawn powerwash. Spray, wipe, rinse. And here we have another burst pipe in denmark. If you look close. Jamie, are there any interesting photos from your trip . Ouch, okay. Huh, boring, boring, you dont need to see that. Oh, here we go. Can you believe my client steig had never heard of a home and auto bundle or that renters could bundle . Wait, youre a lawyer . Only licensed in stockholm. What is happening . Jamie anyway, game show, kumite, cinderella story. You know karate . No, alan, i practice muay thai, completely different skillset. vo i want to rock rock i want to rock rock i want to rock rock rock rock rock rock rock rock i want to. chris rock whod you expect . Sylvester Stallone i dont know. Me . vo i want to rock rock rock rock rock i want to rock peshould become at scelebrity accountant. And, i tell them, nobody should. But, i just dont think you need a separate private plane. But i, but i want it hey, buddy. Whats the damage . I bought it the waterfall . Nope a new volkswagen. A volkswagen . i think were having a breakthrough here. Welcome to caesars palace. Thank you. cheers and applause band playing stephen hey, everybody welcome back folks, my first guest is a bestselling author, and cnns chief medical correspondent, please welcome for his first Stephen Colbert interview, dr. Sanjay gupta thank you, doctor good to see you cheers and applause band playing thank you thank you so much for being on here tonight. Thanks for having me. I wish it were under, you know, better circumstances. Stephen me, too. Appreciate it. Stephen but, you know, a good time to talk to dr. Sanjay gupta. Youre inform ago lot of people over on cnn, i see you talking with anderson many nights. Yeah. Stephen youre a doctor and you have a new podcast called coronavirus fact vs. Fiction. Stephen lets get into some of the fact versus fiction tonight. You talk on the podcast about the line between caution and panic, and thats certainly something weve talked about here about, lets say, when to get rid of audiences or how to do the show maybe without the staff in the building so we try to keep people as safe as we can, where is that line bec ate sems kind of blurry right now. Yeah, and i think it feels different for different people and it changes. Its changed a lot over the last two months. You know, we have been covering this story in great detail for some time. People now more than ever are really starting to pay attention. I dont think it ever should cross into panic because panic doesnt serve any purposes, i think certainly from a medical standpoint. The medical establishment is having to prepare here, but i think the idea that people should be concerned enough to really start to do things with their own lives, that can help protect them, i think is real. I mean, thats within all of us at this point. Stephen well, let me rephrase it slightly then, how worried should we be . I think for the majority of people, this is not going to be something thats going to make them tremendously ill, this coronavirus. It might make them sick for a few days, theyre likely to recover. Stephen how does that manifest itsself . Because ive heard that, for 80 to have the people and correct my numbers if you need to that 80 to have the people, you will have nothing or something mild. Right. Stephen to manifest. But the 20 , it could be severe. When it does manifest itself, what is that . People will develop a pretty significant pneumonia. A lot of times theyll develop inname medication in the lungs. You think of the lungs as being soft sponges. When you get inflammation, they dont work as well and its harder to breathe. Initially, someone might have difficulty walking up a flight of stairs without getting short of breath. Stephen li