Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20161229 :

Transcripts For KNTV Late Night With Seth Meyers 20161229

[ light laughter ] donald trump is reportedly considering arriving at his inauguration by helicopter, and so is chris christie. [ light laughter ] take me with you i cant go back to new jersey former Trump Campaign manager Cory Lewandowski said today that Donald Trumps presidency will make it okay for people to say Merry Christmas again. Cory, weve always been allowed to say Merry Christmas, its just no one says it to you. [ light laughter ] a Skin Care Company has launched a new cream designed to combat neck wrinkles. Im sorry, neck wrinkles. [ light laughter ] when i say neck, my neck seizes up. It is like oh, my neck is ringing. [ light laughter ] keep talking, all right, here we go. A Skin Care Company has launched a new cream designed to combat neck wrinkles formed by looking down at phones and laptops. No words on how to combat the neck wrinkles formed by looking down on immigrants. [ audience oohs ] [ cheers and applause ] took a while. Took a while. We got there. We got there. A long walk. [ light laughter ] facebook has filed a patent on a system to automatically identify and remove posts containing fake news, and just after the nick of time. [ light laughter ] abcs the bachelor has launched its own collection of wines. 25 different types, but theyre pretty much indistinguishable from each other. [ light laughter ] white. White. [ light laughter ] and finally, a company is developed a new bed spread that can make itself every morning. How it works is you live with your mom. [ light laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] ladies and gentlemen, youre here on an excellent night. He is one of our favorites, Academy Award winning Filmmaker Michael Moore will be here. [ cheers and applause ] and were going to talk about the election and how it completely matched up with his predictions for it. Also from vh1, the host of the new season of americas next top model, and an incredible musician, rita ora is back on the show. [ cheers and applause ] and we will have music from the wonderful kasey musgraves. So, youre here on a very good night. Before we get to all that, since the election of donald trump and the ascension of his righthand man, steve bannon, there have been fears about the rise of white supremacy. Yet the media seems to be bending over backward to normalize the socalled alt right movement. Take this recent headline from cnn. Com. Hipster or hate monger, the trendy young face of austrias far right. This brings us to a segment we call hey [ applause ] hey, media, what are you doing . How do you confuse hipsters with nazis . Nazis like to invade other peoples territory and turn it into a utopia for the white race, whereas hispters, okay, okay. [ light laughter ] now i see the confusion. But still. Still. Check out this article from the la times. White nationalist come to washington in hope of influencing trump. Hey, just a tip, news media, if youre trying to warn us about the dangers of White Supremacists, maybe dont use their tinder pic. [ light laughter ] i enjoy tennis, backgammon and forced walks on the beach. And hey alt right is the name they picked for themselves. You dont have to use it. If zombies wanted to be called postlife brain foodies, wed still call them zombies. If it looks like a duck, and talks like a duck, and steps like a goose, its a nazi. [ light laughter ] and hey. This is america. [ applause ] right here. This is america. And if weve ever done anything we could all be proud of, it was defeating the nazis. Although dubious articles, like this one from the atlantic do not help. Are jews white . I dont know, do they subscribe to the atlantic . [ light laughter ] also, i think youre missing the bigger point. Which is that somebody wants to know, for some reason its not an innocent question. Nobody says, are jews white . And then follows it up with, well, either way, i just love em. [ light laughter ] get your [ bleep ] together, media. Calling nazis and White Supremacists the alt right is like calling o. J. Simpons a cutlery enthusiat. [ light laughter ] this has been hey [ cheers and applause ] well be right back with Michael Moore, everybody. Ho ho ho so, what would you like . Can i have a 2017 lexus lx 570. With dual Screen Entertainment . Yeah if youre going to wish, wish big at the lexus december to remember sales event. Get up to 2,500 customer cash on select 2016 and 2017 models for these terms. See your lexus dealer. vo the old way of doing taxes isnt good enough. So, were about to blow it up. Dont just get your taxes done. Get your taxes won. Heyyyyy its the Little Things that make life rich. Ritz. Sing girl, come on. [ singing ] sorry, ariana you gotta go. Seriously . Verizon limits me and i gotta get home. Youre gonna choose navigation over me . Maps get up here. Umm. That way. 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[ cheers and applause ] seth welcome back everybody. And please give it up for the 8g band right over there. [ cheers and applause ] also back on the drums with us tonight, hes a Founding Member of the groundbreaking and grammy awardwinning california based band, deftones, whose latest album gore is out now. Say hello to abe cunningham, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] thank you so much for being here, abe. Thank you guys. Seth our first guest tonight is the Academy Awardwinning filmmaker of documentaries like roger and me, bowling for columbine, and fahrenheit 9 11, please welcome back to the show our friend Michael Moore. [ cheers and applause ] seth always so nice to see you. Good to see you. Seth so here we are. I want to start with last time you were here was august. And you had just written an article titled five reasons donald trump will win. And it was at a time where he was down in the polls and people thought you were crazy. And is this a case where you are bummed out at how right you were . Yes, i never wanted to be more wrong. Seth yeah. And i remember when i actually when i said this on the show, the audience like moaned, like no. Seth yeah. You know, well because it didnt seem possible. Seth it didnt seem possible. She was ahead in the polls. She was winning the debates. It was a great convention. Seth yeah, and and hes crazy. Seth yeah. [ laughter ] so all important. Seth but yet and it wasnt just that you predicted it, you sort of called the reason why it might happen. And you named four states, michigan, ohio, pennsylvania, wisconsin, that you thought he had a strength in. And that is exactly how it played out. Yeah. Seth do yes, i caught yes picked i picked the four. And ever since then people have been asking me for help with their lotto numbers. Seth although its interesting because, its like you hit the lotto, but instead of winning 6 million, you got kicked in the nuts. [ laughter ] its like the negative lotto. Seth you won the negative lotto. So my question is do you think now looking forward to four years down the line. Do you think the democrats are taking enough stock of what they got wrong . Or do you think theyre sort of playing the blame game too much and maybe missing the message of what happened in this election . Well heres the democrats biggest problem, and this includes people who voted for hillary. They dont act like they won. They won. Shes 2. 7 million votes ahead of trump tonight. Seth yeah. Almost three million, almost as many votes as obama got in 2012. Seth right. All right . So the democrats, this is the second time this has happened in 16 years, it happened with gore, where they win the popular vote but lose the white house. This would be like the giants beating the patriots 2119 and then the sportscasters going, well its too bad the giants lost that game. Seth yeah. Its like, no. We have to get rid of this Electoral College. This is the biggest seth but is that going to happen . Yes. Its going to happen. Seth how . I will lead the charge. [ applause ] seth but i mean the American Public is not and i would be saying the same thing if trump was ahead by 2. 7 million votes. Seth right. I would accept the fact that my fellow americans wanted him as president of the United States. I wouldnt like it. I would accept it. The fact is the majority of my fellow americans did not want him. And if you add in the votes for jill stein and guy who didnt know where aleppo was. Seth right. [ laughter ] if you add that in, thats 54 of the voters didnt want donald trump. Only 46 did. So he is going to not have a mandate. The majority of our fellow americans do not want him in the white house. But because of an arcane law from the 1700s that was set up to placate the slave states. Seth yeah. So they would join the union, so they gave them a little more power, because they had a lesser population, so in the irony of a man who said so many things that were racist during the campaign. That he would benefit from a law from the 1700s to placate the slave states, is just the irony of it is unbearable. And but the other thing the Founding Fathers thought about this, and this was hamiltons, one of his genius ideas. Was that maybe there should be a spot gap, just in case, you know, a madman, somebody thought he was going to be king gets elected. Theres that one final door hes got to go through. So right now and if you dont mind, i made that prediction in the summer. Seth yeah, you came and you called it. So id like to make another tonight. Seth great, were excited. Get your moan on, audience. [ laughter ] seth they practice. Yeah. He is not president of the United States yet. Seth yeah. Hes not president , right . [ applause ] he is not president until noon on january 20th of 2017. That is, that is, what are we, this is wednesday night . Seth yeah. So thats more than six weeks away. We do not agree, regardless what side of the political fence youre on. This has been the craziest election year. Seth it certainly has. Nothing anyone has predicted has happened. Seth yeah. Every its the opposite has happened. Seth yes. So is it possible, just possible, that in these next six weeks Something Else might happen. Seth yeah. Something crazy. Something were not expecting. Seth do you think its possible that he now realizes this job is way more work than he wanted it to be . Oh, he is so bummed out. Seth i think hes bummed out too. [ laughter ] i think hes bummed out too. Hes really [ applause ] seth i hes like a guy the fact that hes doing the rallies, its like he got married and now once a week says to his wife, im going to go hit the bars with the fellows. No its he wants a Bachelor Party every night seth yeah. After the wedding. Hes definitely going out and doing you know and friday hell be in grand rapids, michigan, for the next bachelor. Seth yeah. Its no, he really because now hes been told theres all this work to do. You have to live in washington, d. C. In a majority black city. Seth yes. I think its a majority. Its just such a small house for him. Its a 200yearold fixer upper seth it really is. [ laughter ] its like its like im sure when he walks in there and goes, wheres the penthouse . Its like ivanka says, dad you know, there is a second floor. Thats not a penthouse. My bet seriously, i bet hes in there two hours if he does get in. Seth yeah. If. Seth well, i isnt it okay so for with all its you know, we can talk and speculate, what if the electoral Voters Decide not to vote . Dont you think this country would be in a terrifying place right now . Were already in a terrifying place. Seth i know. I know, but like if the people who voted for him no matter what, even though theyre in the minority as far as total number of votes. Wouldnt you be afraid of their outrage if anything happened that would take him away from this office . Well first of all, he may decide that he wants to quit. Seth right. You know, before he even takes office. I mean, everyone is gonna know thats not possible. Everybody in this audience at some point in their life, on the first day of the job knew they had taken the wrong job. Seth right. Right . Seth yeah, thats true. And [ applause ] and many people, many people have quit a job in that first week, first month, first six months. Right . Seth yeah. This is it is possible where he just goes, oh this is too much, i dont want this. Seth well he would never say it is too much. Let pence run the county. Seth he would say it would be Something Else. He would blame it on us. Blame it on us. Seth it would be our fault. Well because hes such a narcissist, it would have to somehow be about him. Seth i cant see him saying, guys im in over my head. I cant see that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Im giving him too much credit. I have to come talk to you and come back to reality. Its really, i just yes. Anything can happen. The Electoral College, i mean the first electorate announced in the times yesterday that a republican from texas, he is not gonna vote for trump, even though he was supposed to. We only need, like, i dont know, 32 more to say the same thing. Seth youre gonna end up with one. Thats the final number. So you say that because that normal. Youre normal thinking only one. All right. Dont have me back on next week after weve got five more. Seth thats true. So seth well thats true. Well maybe this is, im trying to because i was so wrong last time, im trying to say that, have that same thing again. Lets come back, but i want to come back and i do want to talk, because i think you would agree. There was a core brilliance to the way he ran his campaign. And i think we should come back and talk about that. Evil brilliance yes. Seth well be right back with more Michael Moore after this. [ cheers and applause ] i love it. This piece is so you. I know, right . I saw it and i was just like oh, i have to have it. Is it suede . Its suede. I love suede. State farm knows that every one those moments, theres one of these. Well . I love it. This piece is so you. I know, right . I saw it and i was just like i have to have it. Is it suede . Its suede. I love suede. Thats why were there, with renters insurance, when things go wrong. But also here, with a rewards credit card, to help life go right. State farm. Usic keep on the sunny side Edward Sharpe proof of less joint pain. And clearer skin. This is my body of proof that i can fight Psoriatic Arthritis with humira. 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We were talking about the campaign, donald trump ran, certainly unconventional, and yet all these sort of road marks that you would think would show a losing campaigns, did not do well in the debates, kind of had a convention that was a bit of a mess, seemed more focused on selling hats then actually having commercials and yet that all worked. Yep but see they laughed at that so many hats. But the truth is that out beyond the hudson river, between the hudson river and interstate 5. Seth yeah in los angeles. Yes, thats where i mean i will be on the wall where the white walkers are or the walking dead depending if you can only afford basic cable. [ light laughter ] this is where the majority of the people vote and actually people wear ball caps. Thats just a natural thing, trump somehow knew that. Seth yeah. It wasnt a joke to him. He knew to go out there in that ball cap. Because if you live in michigan or whatever, we wear i mean i dont have it on tonight, i crossed over into the bubble here. Seth yeah exactly. Thank you, yeah. Out of respect you kn

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