And featuring the legendary roots crew. Questlove 578, yeah steve and now, here he is, jimmy fallon [ cheers and applause ] jimmy welcome, everybody. Welcome, welcome, welcome. [ cheers and applause ] thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. Welcome to the tonight show, everyone. This is it. You made it. Happy [ cheers and applause ] i want to wish everyone here a a happy, happy thanksgiving. Hey [ cheers and applause ] i get to spend it with you. Spend it with you, perfect, perfect. Oh, man, this is just exciting here. Earlier today we had the macys thanksgiving day parade. Thats right. Thousands of parents woke up extra early to bring their kids to the city, snag a spot in the front row only to hear, dad, i have to go to the bathroom. You go, yeah, i know. I knew you were going to say that. [ cheers and applause ] i knew you were gonna say it. Go in your pants. [ laughter ] i saw that i saw that some of the parade route was two and a half miles long and took about 90 minutes. Yeah, while the float from kenya finished in just 60 minutes. But thats the fourth year in a a row. [ laughter and applause ] every year. Steve its not fair jimmy i dont know how i dont know how it happens. Check this out. I read that this years macys parade features 1,000 clowns. It got weird when macys said, we only hired 500 clowns. [ laughter and applause ] [ clown laugh ] [ laughter ] jimmy this is interesting. [ laughter ] sorry, thats my ringtone. [ laughter ] steve it is pretty funny. Jimmy i have a scary clown scary clown ringtone hold on a second, yeah. [ laughter ] this is interesting, though. It turns out the balloons for the parade came from new jersey. And, yeah. [ cheers ] and they actually went through the lincoln tunnel to get to new york city. Yeah. To make sure they fit, they had Chris Christie go through first. Steve hey, hey [ cheers and applause ] oh jimmy whoa, whoa, whoa steve oh, oh jimmy whoa, whoa, whoa steve heyoh jimmy whoa, hey steve hey [ jersey accents ] jimmy on thanksgiving. Dont do it on thanksgiving. Hey, jimmy [ laughter ] steve dvd jimmy jimmy, come on. This is for you. Its for you. Take this. [ laughter ] meanwhile i read that donald trump and his family spent thanksgiving at his mara lago resort in palm beach, florida. Marking the only thanksgiving dinner where you are actually allowed to bring up donald trump. [ laughter and applause ] youve got to be really careful. I guess trump really loves thanksgiving because its the one day a year he can talk about legs, thighs and breasts without getting in trouble. [ cheers and applause ] so, its perfect. Steve oh hey, hey whoa oh jimmy i saw that snoop dogg just posted a 30minute video of himself smoking weed, eating turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce, and pumpkin pie. [ light laughter ] yeah. Asked if he was having a good thanksgiving, snoop said, its thanksgiving . [ laughter and applause ] oh, thats interesting. Happy thanksgiving. And, finally listen to this. A doctor in arizona said there is a 25 to 30 increase in emergency room visits on thanksgiving, but dont worry. Most of the time, it just turns out grandma was just napping. [ applause ] there you go. We have a great show tonight. Give it up for the roots, everybody [ cheers and applause ] [ cheers and applause ] you name it [ cheers and applause ] jimmy it is thursday. It is thanksgiving [ cheers and applause ] and boy, we have a special show tonight. [ cheers and applause ] this guy is one of the funniest human beings out there. Hes the star of kevin can wait and the new netflix film, true memoirs of an international assassin. Kevin james is here tonight. Steve yeah [ cheers and applause ] funny man. Funny man. Jimmy its going to be fun. We have fun things planned out with kevin. Hes always great. You want to stick around for that. Plus, we love when he stops by. From project runway, tim gunn is dropping in. Steve yeah [ cheers and applause ] jimmy and we got great music. [ singing star wars theme ] [ light laughter ] jimmy the weeknd is here steve yeah [ cheers and applause ] jimmy he is so talented, this guy. He is unbelievable. I love the weeknd. Its going to be fun. Hes, like, doing a cool medley, special for us tonight. Steve ooh. Jimmy yeah. [ cheers ] steve thanksgiving medley. Jimmy a fellow thanksgiving medley. You guys, today is thanksgiving. Its all about giving thanks. So, i thought, what a better day to write my weekly thank you notes . If i could do it right now, do you guys mind . [ cheers and applause ] got note cards here. I got my envelopes there. James, can i get some thank you note writing music, please . Jimmy wow. [ light laughter ] hes still doing the mannequin challenge. Steve yeah. [ laughter ] jimmy he hasnt stopped doing the mannequin challenge. Steve no. Jimmy thank you, trolls balloon at the macys thanksgiving day parade for being the second biggest troll filled with hot air in new york city. There you go. Steve heyoh [ cheers and applause ] ho, ho, ho, ho hey [ jersey accents ] jimmy not today jimmy, not today steve hey, hey, hey jimmy hey, whoa, whoa, whoa steve i forgot about it. [ laughter ] jimmy no, i mean forget about it. Steve hey. Jimmy no. Jimmy thank you, pilgrims, for dressing like tim gunn handed you a bunch of belt buckles and said, make it work. [ laughter and applause ] steve a hat with a buckle. Jimmy a hat with a buckle, man. Steve buckle it up, man. Jimmy you know how big your head is sometimes. Steve you dont know. You go outside, you go, man, i wish that this hat was smaller. Buckle it up. Jimmy thank you, cranberry sauce for making my plate of turkey look like a crime scene. [ laughter and applause ] steve what happened . Jimmy yeah. Do you like i love cranberry sauce. Steve do you really . Jimmy do you put it on sandwiches after . Steve no. I refuse to. Jimmy what are you talking steve no, i dont want to do it. Jimmy no, i refuse. I have a steve i make myself jimmy a special sandwich steve made with homemade mayonnaise. Jimmy homemade mayonnaise and aioli, saffron aioli. Steve aioli, and i whipped that with an immersion blender. Jimmy yeah, so i dont do the mayonnaise. I do, i do steve i know. You dont like mayonnaise. I love mayo. Jimmy i do the turkey. I do the turkey. I do the stuffing. Steve yep. Jimmy and then, i do cranberry sauce that acts as the mayonnaise. cause its fun. Steve i usually take i usually take [ laughter ] jimmy and, then i put i put steve a hamburger on top of it . [ laughter ] jimmy no. No, then just toast. Toast is what i do. Steve yeah, you toast it up. Jimmy does everyone toast it . [ audience yells no ] thats what im saying. See, thats where we switched it up. Steve yeah, you switch it up. Jimmy do you remember when i was on saturday night live, and we called up the Carnegie Deli . Steve oh, yeah. Jimmy and i would order sandwiches for everybody in the writers room, and id go, can i get an al pacino . And can i get a, you know because they were named after famous actors and stuff, all the sandwiches . And i go, can i get a a jimmy fallon . [ laughter ] and the guy was like, whats that . And i go, ill get an al pacino. Oh, i got that. I go, Robert De Niro . Yeah, now what was the other one you said . I go, yeah, a jimmy fallon . Hes like, yeah, i forgot that. What is that . Its turkey with cranberry sauce. [ laughter ] now, they tell those tales. Steve now theyve got it. Jimmy yeah, at the time. This is back in 1976. [ laughter ] steve when you first started. Jimmy yeah, this is back when james started the mannequin challenge. [ laughter ] still doing it. [ cheers and applause ] steve still doing it. They call that commitment. All the commitment, jimmy baseball, mr. Commitment. Jimmy thank you, crescent rolls, for looking like a a babys thigh. Aw. [ laughter and applause ] thats cute. Steve little ham hock. Jimmy thank you, macys thanksgiving day parade for celebrating your 90th anniversary this year, which explains why this year, the parade wandered into central park and forgot how it got there. [ laughter ] itll be fine. [ applause ] itll be fine. Dont worry about it. We saw where it went. Steve i know where im going. Jimmy thank you, tiny espressos, for not being called mug shots. [ laughter and applause ] a thinker. Steve nice. Jimmy its a thinker. Steve you open up a chain of those. Jimmy thank you, gourds, for being a squash thats going through its awkward years. [ laughter and applause ] [ laughter ] and finally thank you, the kids table, for being a fun place for kids and any adult who doesnt want to talk about politics. There you go, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] those are my thank you notes. Im so thankful for you. Happy thanksgiving. Well be right back with kevin james, everybody [ cheers and applause ] vo the holidays may be over but if you hurry, you can still get the best deals on the best network. Like verizons best smartphones for only 10 per month. Like the Samsung Galaxy s7. The pixel, phone by google. Or the motoz droid. For only 10 per month. Plus, hurry in and switch to verizon now and get up to 650 to cover your costs. Theres still time to get amazing deals at verizon. But when we brought our daughter home, that was it. Now i have nicoderm cq. The nicoderm cq patch with unique extended release Technology Helps prevent your urge to smoke all day. Its the best thing that ever happened to me. Every great why needs a great how. 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Our first guest stars on the popular new Television Series kevin can wait, which airs mondays at 8 00 p. M. On cbs. He has a brand new actionpacked comedy film called true memoirs of an international assassin. Its now streaming on netflix, just in time for the big thanksgiving holiday weekend. Please welcome the very funny, the always entertaining, kevin james [ cheers and applause ] jimmy welcome back that is a thats a heart rate checker, right there. Jimmy thats a heart rate checker there. Thank you very much. Always know how to make an entrance, my friend. Thank you so much. Jimmy i appreciate it. Thank you for spending part of your thanksgiving holiday with us. Happy thanksgiving. Jimmy were very a [ cheers and applause ] very thankful that youre here. Yeah. Jimmy do you do you enjoy a big thanksgiving . Do you do all the a no, no. [ laughter ] jimmy i didnt mean that. I meant, do you enjoy do you celebrate it . Whats your favorite holiday food . My favorite . If i had to pick one . Jimmy on the menu on the thanksgiving menu. Oh, thats like, sophies choice right there. [ light laughter ] i like them all. The thing with me though i like, simple foods. Like the classic. You know, thats the thing with me, when i do a holi thats why i like doing it at my house, cause i can control it. You go to someone elses house. I just like the classic the basics. We got turkey, you got your mashed potatoes, you get your stuffing, you get cranberry sauce and i like the cranberry sauce, out of the can with the rings on it. I want to see that thing on the plate. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy me, too. Thats my favorite. Nah, thats the worst. When you hear theyre adding chutney to it or like blackberries, or Something Like that. Thats the five worst words i can hear from anybody, is that we made our own stuffing. I dont want to hear that. [ light laughter ] jimmy really . Yes. Stuffing . Come on. I mean, the people at stovetop, they know what theyre doing. Let them do it. [ cheers and applause ] honestly, every day for 100 years, these people drive to a building that says stouffers on it. They go in there, and they make stuffing all day long. And you in your Little Kitchen in wankankama, are going to try to bang out some stuffing thats gonna to top this . [ laughter and applause ] jimmy wankankama. Its literally, thats like me going you know what . Im gonna go into the olympics next year. Im gonna be the one [ light laughter ] jimmy so, yeah. What are you gonna to do . Ah, it doesnt matter. Ill figure it out when i get there. Jimmy well throw some chutney in there. Yeah, exactly. Ah, but how are the kids doing . Theyre doing well . Kids are amazing. I have four kids. Four jimmy wow. You have two girls, right . Jimmy i have two little girls. Yeah, three and two. Girls are amazing, right . [ cheers ] jimmy theyre great. I love them so much, yeah. Theyre the sweetest. My little one especially ah shes such a an angel. Shell literally stop playing the others are great. But she comes and shell make a a point of it, shell come up to me and say, daddy, can i talk to you. And say yeah, honey, whats up . And she just said, i just want you to know, shell grab my hand and she goes, i just want you to know i love you so much. [ audience aws ] i know, i know. And then im like, i love you so much. And shes like no, no, no. I love you more than anything. And i was like, i love you more than anything. And then she literally said to me, she goes, no. And she said this, she goes, i love you more than ice cream. [ audience aws ] and i was like [ laughter ] what do you say . Im not gonna lie, i was like, thank you. I dont know. [ laughter and applause ] jimmy thats, shes taking it too far. Yeah, come on. Jimmy i cant do that. Im like, i love you more than cottage cheese. But lets not get im not going to lie to my kid. Come on. Jimmy frozen yogurt, maybe. Yeah, well talk about it. Jimmy hows your son though . Hes old, hes getting old. My son is getting hes age five now. Hes a good you know, boys are crazy. The a this was wild. When he was four, i was wrestling around with him once on my chest, and the action just kind of slowed down. And he kids just do this. He just looked at me, and i didnt know what was happening. But he sneezed, right in my mouth. [ laughter ] and i threw up on him immediately. Immediately. [ laughter ] immediately, like right like right away. It was like bangbang. Thats how fast it happened. No, but the reason i tell you this is, my wife got mad at me for throwing up on him. Like like i meant she was like, how can you . Thats your own flesh and blood. Why would you throw up she said, why would you why would i throw up. Like i made a conscious decision, to like you know jimmy yeah, and you can just do that too, yeah. Yeah, you know, honey, he sneezed on my mouth. We should take away video games. You know what, check that. Hold his legs. Im going to throw up on him. [ retching ] jimmy its almost there. Hold up. Yeah. And are you anything that youre not good at as being a a dad . I mean, is there anything one day youre like, well, im not the best at this. Im not im not good at answering like my father knew i dont know. He knew everything. Any question i ever had, i asked my dad, how do planes fly . How does, you know, the tv work . He would explain it to me. And i just, i dont have that. If i dont have like, the internet near me or Something Like that, my kid will just shell be like, you know, how do you make ice cubes . And im literally locked up. Im like [ laughter ] i know, i mean im like well, what happens is the water gets at a certain point it gets very cold, and then it and she knows she kind of has me. cause then shell be like, shes like, well then what happens . Im like, well, then it freezes. Shes like, but how does that happen . And im like, the um, the mole uh jimmy its an ice cube. Its magic. I go to that a lot, i go its magic. Jimmy yeah, youve got to do that. All right, ill use that well. Ill use that. cause i dont know how to explain it. Im horrible with it. Jimmy im loving the show kevin can wait. And congratulations, on your giant hit. Thank you, thank you. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy its the biggest show on tv. Its funny. Its also you know, going in not knowing the show, and not knowing what could happen i just loved it immediately, right off the bat. And its like kind of like a a comfort food. Its a classic sitcom. I love the fourcamera shoots, and i love the old shows that just made me feel like, you know, with a song in the beginning, and then just go into it. Jimmy and it looks like youre having fun. It is. Jimmy please, cant we just have fun . Thats it. Its really what it is. Its a great cast. Its with sandler, with ray romano. They were great. Ah, weve had a bunch of guys. And its just so much fun. We got i got billy joel coming up, man. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy hes gonna be on the show . Yeah. Im not supposed to say anything. But, i dont care. Jimmy all right, he doesnt care. Oh, wow, oh my god. Yeah, hes awesome. Jimmy hes the greatest. Yo, he loves you by the way. Jimmy well i know, i love him, too. Oh, man and then you have the netflix movie as well. This is called, the true memoirs of an international assassin. Yes. Jimmy i love it. I know, i play jimmy i love it. Im in already. I mean, youre great. [ cheers and applause ] i know, yeah, thank you. Jimmy you know, its it is not really the true memoirs of an international no, no. I play an author and a deadly assassin, which im not sure which ones harder to believe. Its a bit of a stretch for both. But i get mixed up jimmy i can see i can see you as an author. I dont know. I i dont know. The last book i read was clifford the big red dog. [ light laughter ] jimmy its a classic. Thats it. Did you get to the end . Yeah, its pretty good. Yeah, but it no, it was a a fun movie, cause it was a a stretch for me to play this stuff. And i had to literally learn all these crazy moves, and learn how to fight. And i never shot a gun before. I really never never really so they taught me, and they said to make sure your fingers always on the outside of a gun, cause you gotta be careful. Unless youre going to shoot it, unless youre firing it. Which jimmy on the ring, on the outside . Yes, yes. You always keep it on the outside, unless youre ready to fire it. And then you put it on the trigger. And during the whole movie, i have my hand on the outside of the gun. Im like, not until im ready to shoot. And then when i was shooting they said, they took me aside and they said, youve gotta youve gotta stop doing this one thing. And i was like, what is it . And they go, youre going youre saying bang with your mouth. [ laughter ] i was literally i was like i go, youre out of your mind. I go, im not doing that. Im not doing that. And they played it back for me. And im going bang, bang, bang. [ laughter and applause ] so, yeah. Jimmy no, thats fun for everybody. Yeah. Jimmy but, yeah. Well, i want to show a clip. The idea, is basically that, to sell this book someone made up a story, so that you really are they ma