Probably be lyrilly talib kweli. And kweli was like, man, truthfully, i wanted to rhyme like common sense, but i sold 5 mill. I aint been rhyming like common sense. And common was like, hey. [ laughter ] im not surhow i feel about at. Jimmy getting weird. And then afterwards, we go to the edit and this is when everyone knew kanye was going to be a star. Antcngke we could watch some sketches. No one ever seen ts. Wehim thamesri j skse great sketch. And the mide oft, li hello . O. D hes no, i cant. No, cause im at the edit for the Dave Chappelle show setching sketcheato s befor and then goes kehis, cause my life is dope, and i do dope and he hung up. [ laughter and applause ] jimmy kanye was born. Yeah. Jimmy kanye west was born. No record out. Jimmy that was great. Oh, my gosh. I love that. Dave chappelle, s at radio ci music hall june 18th to the 26th. [ cheers and applause ] thanks a lot, buddy. Greet see you. Pleacome back whenever you want. [ cheers and applause ] icet and body count perform next, everybody eers and applause ] two medium cappuccinos lets show em what a breakfast with whole grain fiber can do. With large mocha latte, medium macchiato, a light hot chocolate hold the whip, two espressos. Make one a double. Shes full and focused. Barista ] i have two cappuccinos, one coffee with room, one large mocha latte, medium mchiato, a ght hoho the whip, o so one with a double shot. Barista ] i have two cappuccinos, one coffee with room, one large mocha latte, with whole wheat goodness on one side and a hint of sweetness on the other, its a delicious way gont. Making sure you pay thright price for a new car just got a whole lot easier. Us way introducing e blue book e advi the powerful tool that shows you what should pay. It gives you a Fair Purchase Price thats based on what others recently for the same car s te. Thats just heb. M helps you make a smart new car decision. How can a table place yoap lp . 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Your Wireless Company the new crickerelet wi believes you should be doing a lot more of this. So we dont have any of those silly annual contracts. But do havewhole lot of cove. For not a lot of money. Hose silly annual contracts. So everyone. Can feel like this. Sign up now. And50 m g a ebate promion card when you purchase w cricket wireless. S or android smphone. Something tomile about. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy our next guest just released their first album in eight years, manslaughter and all summer see them live as part of the Rock Star Energy drink mayhem festival. Please welcome icet and body count [ cheers and applause ] people always say ice t you got some money i say i just got some money i didnt come from there i came from the dark side and i never want to go back ever the ghettos not black the ghetto is poor you dont know cuz you aint never met me before you prejudge my life and you dont know my pain you think youre so much better when were all the same because you has money you think youre above us all youre just so self righteous until you take that fall and then youre flat broke and you need food to eat once behind guarded gates and now you walk police are different now you get messed with every day you walk by people now they move the other way you never cared bout nothin just lived your selfish life you never cared about nothin hungry you might welcome to the dark side survival makes you blood thirsty enter the dark side survival makes you blood thirsty welcome to the dark side survival makes you blood thirsty dont ever judge a man til youve lived his life the tables could turn in the blink of an eye talking crap down from that high horse you ride one mistake for you enter the dark side enter the dark side survival makes you blood thirsty enter the dark side survival makes you blood thirsty bloood thirsty blood thirsty blood thirsty blood thirsty [ cheers and applause ] jimmy thats how you do it oh, my goodness, thats how you do it right there. Icet and body count. Manslaughter in stores now. See them live this summer on the Rock Star Energy drink mayhem festival. Well be right back, everybody. [ cheers and applause ] chnd a]ee a jim thankto cet ant. Eers and applause ] and the roots right there, laes and gentlemen. [ applause ] stay tuned for te night with re weekend and to see you next week. Happy fathers day. Bye bye [ cheers and applause ] announcer from 30 Rockefeller Plaza in new york its late night with seth meyers. Tonight james mcavoy. Wendi mclendoncovey. Kumail nanjiani. Featuring the 8g band with fred armisen. [ cheers and applause ] and now, here he is, seth meyers. [ cheers and applause ] seth good evening. Im seth meyers. This is late night. How is everybody doing tonight . [ cheers and applause ] are we well . Thats excellent news. At is cellent news. Theres also some banews, Donald Sterling news, well, it just keeps coming. [ laughter no other way to put it than it just keeps coming. On monday the nba annoced it will hold a meeting to decide whether to revoke Donald Sterlings ownership of the clippers. The meeting is expected to last from 9 00 a. M. To 9 01 a. M. [ laer ] fingers crossed for donald. This is pretty cool. An 11yearold boy in ireland was able to save his grandfather from a car accident by taking the wheel and using skills he learned playing grand theft auto. [ laughter ] so it was probably unnecessary for him to pull er and beat up that hooker. [ laughter and applause ] you just dont need to do that. Theres no reason to do that. Thiss truly crazy. A high school in arizona add ai, im working a dblshift which features students who are teen parents. [ audience ohs ] while in florida, that section is just lled sophomores. [ laughter and applause ] some cat new you guys like cat news . [ cheers ] a 24yearold cat in englandas en named the worlds oldest cat. That cat is so old, if you give it a ball of yar it knits. [ lauger ] cat snap [ laughter ] that concludes tonights cat snap. [ light laughter ] i just, you know, sometimes cats get full of themselves and you need you need to snap a cat. [ laughter ] you know, you need to you know, i grew up in a place with cats and people would snap each other. [ laughter ] t sure what to think of this. The New York Times reports that for 1,000 a month, men can hire a social Development Coach. A social Development Coach to help them appear more confident when talking to women. That way you can confidently tell a woman i had to hire a coach so could i talk to you. [ laughter ] also, if you dont want to spend a thousand dollars a month to be more confident, you can pay 6 for a beer. [ laughter ] like people have been doing for generations. [ cheers and applause ] led zeppelin, the band led zeppelin is being sued by the band spirit who are claiming the stairway to heaven is based on one of their songs. If youre unfamiliar with the band spirit, theyre best known for somehow never hearing stairway to heaven over the past 43 years. [ laughter ] interesting news according to recent study, amerans hate their cable tv and internet providers more than any other industry. Yes said airlines [ cheers and applause ] great news for airlines. This is a shame. A man in florida has been arrested for inappropriately touching two women outside a walmart whe claiming to be a psychic. Though to his credit wh police picked him up he said, i knew this was going happen. [ laughter ] this was just like my vision. [ ause ] this is weird. Today mcdonalds unveiled a new mascot modeled after a happy meal box that has eyes and teeth, or as mcdonalds calls them, gredients. [ laughter and appuse ] i likeman houston iinhis stripper exgirlfr pottervd thebroke up. [ laughter ] refused gck h also, she gave him a bad case of hogwarts. [ laughter and applause ] this story is completely insane. An intoxicated tennessee man was arrested after he tried to have sex with an atm in bar. Now, all me ofashied but im more comfortable making those kinds of transactions with a real live teller. Laughter maybe its just me. [ applause ] this is just sad. Police in michigan are looking for a man who exposed himself at a local restaurant. Apparently they have some qs about his d. [ laughter and applause ] cat snap [ laughter ] and finally, a man was arrested in Frankfurt Airport last weekend after trying to smuggle 55 torises, 30 lizards, four iguana inside a single suitcase. In oer words, that guy is teible at smuggling but amazing at packing ladies and gentlementhis is the 8g band [ cheers and applause ] jimmy how are we doing, 8g band . Everybody well . This is a treat for us. Sitting in with fred and the 8g band, from dinosaur jr. J. Mascis is here. [ cheers and applause ] give it up for j. J. Has a new solo album coming soon on sub pop. Its called tied to a star and it will be out this summer. I cant wait to hear it. Thank you so much for being here, j. Thanks a lot. [ cheers and applause ] seth and fred, im so happy that youre here. Fred i am, too. Seth its great having you here. Every time youre here i feel like i learn something new about you which is so great. Weve known each other for so long and yet every day, something new. I do worry sometimes that people at home feel like you might be making them up off the top of your head. These things im learning about you. [ laughter ] i dont i dont believe that you would do that. But, is it true, did you just discovered a new species . Fred i did. I did. Its a new species of parakeet. It is so it is tremendous. It is absoluty tremendous. Seth how is it different than a the parakeets we know thus far . Its about a thousand times e size. [ laughter ] seth so, sorry, sorry. Its a thousand times bigger than a normal parakeet . Fred yes. Seth and yet, t i wi say it was a thsand time smaller then i would maybe buy that you were the first person to see it. [ laughter ] but it seems like,t the sce, the scale youre talking about this parakeet, it seems weird youre the first one to see it. Fred well, heres the thing about it. The way that it camouflages itself is, as featrs, it has tinyarakee. You know what sa[ laug fred so its just one mass seth but it s flock of parakeets. Fred exactly, yes. Seth i see. Fred yeah. Seth so is it disguising itself against preto fred i think, yeah. Or people, just onlookers. You know what i mean . Like lookie loos. [ laughter ] i think my theory is that they dont like to be stared at. Seth right. Fred do you know what i mean . So i think as a sort of way to confuse people, thats what they do. Just this massf bis. Seth now, i dont know about you but i would definitely stare at a giant parakeet. I would also stare at a thousand parakeets clumped together in one giant mass. You know what im saying . Fred right. But thats evolution. [ laughter ] i mean, thats how it will chan asarakeets learn this and know this, that will change. Thats the beauty of nature. Seth now, as the one who discovered it, do you get on name it . Fred i do. Seth thats great. [ laughter ] what did you name this new parakeet that you discovered . Fred the paragiakeet. [ laughter ] the gia is in the middle. Seth yeah, gia for giant. Fred yeah. Seth thats great. Fred yeah. Seth because giant parakeet would be obvious. Fred yeah. I mean, you want to make it a little flowery. Make it a little prettier. Seth well congratulations, fred. Give it up for fred armisen. [ cheers and applause ] the paragiakeet. Great news. My parents were here last night. Im always very excited when my parents come to the show. And my mother had injured her shoulder. She was hiking and she fell down and broke her shouer. I had not seen her since this happened but she had been on the phone sort of braggin about how well her physical therapy is going and how her rehabilitation is and how much of the range of motion had returned to her shoulder. So last night during the show, she was in the audience and we cut to her and i asked her to show off her new range of motion. Now, i thought she would maybe wave or do this. But lets take a look at what my mother decided to do to show off the range of motion. [ laughter ] that is the happiest anyone has ever looked while heiling hitler. [ laughter and applause ] so great. Of all the things she could have done. My dadaid afterwards, because i made fun of r. She said, well what would you have done . To which my dad said, literally anything else. [ laughter ] if seth had asked me to show off the motion of my arm, i would have said no before i would have given a nazi salute with a big old grin on my face. [ laughter ] it does lead you to think, maybe back in day, hler had a should injury, right . [ laughter ] goes through some rehab, he sees a friend, the friends like, hey, hows the shoulder . Hes like, ja, its good, ja. [ laughter ] and the friend said, whats that . And hes like, oh, just how i show and hes like, you should do something with that. [ laughter ] who knows . Thats how histo, sometimes the catalyst foristory is the smallest thing. It was such a fun show last night. We also had Patrick Stewart here. The great actor Patrick Stewart was here talking about xmen which was very exciting. And one of the things we do on the show when we have a band like we did last night, is while the band is setting up, it takes a while. So ill go into the audience and do a q and a. Ill just see ifnybody ithe audience has somethi to ask me. So theirst guy asked a question. cause i will say usually the questions are very similar. This was a question i had never hearbefore because it wary specific for patritewart. H, what are you doing . You got captain jean lucpicard and you didnt ask any star trek questions. [ laughter ] he seemed really hurt. So i politely sort of told him, you know, that wasnt really what he was here to talk about. And hes done so many other things, it would have been rude to talk about a thing he hasnt done for a very long time. And then i started asking other people some questions. Then i got curious and i went back to him. And i said, out of curiosity, what would you have asked him about star trek . And immediately could i tell that he had not put any thought into this. [ laughter ] and he looked at me, he took and second and he went, i dont know, like, do you miss flying around on a spaceship . [ laughter and applause ] so needless to say, i cant wait for Patrick Stewart to come back. Thats definitely the first thing im going on ask him. And then finally last night, we had counting crows on which is a band i love and adam duritz was nice enough to come out and talk with me. And august and everything after, i listened to that a lot in college. And it is years old ts ye and i was king adam because he writuch grt breakup songs if the women that the songs ar out over the years had ever been angry with him about the fact that he wrote a song about the break up. And he sort of pointed out, the minute he did i knew it to be true. That in his songs, more often than not, he sort of takes responsibility for the relationship not working. Like he is being selfcritical. And i realized that i had been listening to this blaming the girls that i dated in college, and then maybe last night going to bed, maybe it is time for me to take some responsibility. And so to the girls i dated in college, i just want to say im sorry that i thought this was an okay hair cut to have. [ laughter ] you know . You know . Pplam so nt knowf [ lai you probably cant tell because these cameras arent powerful enough. Little bit of a goatee. Tried thut. Work that didnt work t. S of so i never technically had a goatee but not from a lack of trying. At graduation you would have thought i maybe soed it out for graduation. But not at all. [ light laughter ] you have to remember this is the height of hugh grants popularity. So anything could you do to try to rock that look. And then certainly my year book photo, you know, this would be something that would last forever. You know, everyone i ever went to college with will take this down from the shelf. And i do i want to say that i knew it was my year book so i definitely put some product in my hair. cause my hair was a little wild but it came down nicely. It really came down nicely. [ applause ] so to the three women who were kind enough to make out with me in college, my apologies. [ light laughter ] weve got a great show for you only the. James mcavoy is here [ cheers and applause ] cant wait to talk to him. Also stopping by from the new film blended, wendi mclendoncovey is with us tonight. [ cheers and applause ] and well talk with one of the stars of silicon valley. The very funny kumail nanjiani. Well be right back for more late night right after this. [ cheers and applause ] the exquisite Toyota Highlander booooriiiing hit it guys its got a bin for your chickens, a computer from the future and some giant freaky room for eight. Ooh, yeah but it aint got no room for boring im spacing out on all this space, too no, we aint got no room for boring. Whee for boring, we aint got no room the 2014 highlander. Toyota. Lets go places. What . Use these innertubes in the so, youre sapool . We cant sorry, sir. Its hotel policy. Is it really hotel policy . Im afraid so, sir. Do it. How about now . Woohoo i deserve this. You deserve to be fired. Full flavors, full shapes. Cheetos mixups. Have your next burger with a side of awesome. The oneofakind, creamy blend of sweet and tangy. Miracle whip and proud of it. Like in our sinks. In our hands. Excuse me. Sorry . On our tables. Oh . And in here. And since we expect our phones to be with us wherever we go, shouldnt they be water resistant . I am so sorry. Its totally fine, see. 424. Uh, 216. Yeah, we think so too. Introducing the Samsung Galaxy s5. Available at verizon. Bees do it even educated fleas do it [ female announcer ] bring ky into your love nest. Lets fall in love [ female announcer ] bring ky into your love nest. Nicewhat . Nch . Aflac so this is who you brought to help us out . Oh yeah, hes the best. Hmm. He doesnt look like hes seen a tool in his life. Oh, he doesnt kn