[ cheers and applause jimmy wow wow. Oh, my goodness. Please welcome. Have a seat. Welcome, welcome, welcome to the tonight show, everybuy. Yo here. [ cheers and applause finally. Lets start the show, finally, here can we please . Gosh, it was hot this weekend. Oh, my gosh. [ light laughter ] steve was it it was hot jimmy whats that . Steve was it hot jim it was very hot. The heat was brutal, all around the country. For the first time in years, Ice Cream Truck drivers sold more ice cream than weed steve really [ laughter ] jimmy for the first time, yeah [ cheers and applause this is the first get this, it was so hot that here in new york, they had to cancel the new york city trthlon. [ audience aws ] which means 4,000 people were just wandering the streets going, now what do i brag about on instagram . [ light laughter ] i mean, my brunch . Well, throughout the weekend, people came up with interesting ways to beat the heat. Check out what one guy did when he had to swing by the store s surveillance came captured a man walking into a specialty story in bennington, vermont naked [ laughter ] jimmy the guy was like, its hot out there. Ca and thier said, are you sure its not cold . [ laughter ] [ audience ohs ] steve oh oh hey jimmy very sharp very sharp cashier by the way, you dont want to know wherehihat guy was keeping wallet [ laughter ] im just saying. Lets get to some news he. Over the weekend, white house adviser Stephen Miller went on fox news and said that trump is not a racist people at home were confused they couldnt tell if they were little lies. G [ light laughter ] check this out over the weekend, trump asked swedens pme minister to free pper a ap rocky from jail. Was like, were the home of ikea, we dont do anything asap. [ laughter ] some more news about the president. Over the weekend, a couple at trumps new Jersey Golf Club held a make America Great again themed wedding and t. Actually crashed i take a look at this. Yeah, he showed up [ light laughter ]ye , he cut in right after hearing, you may now kiss the bride. Hes like, all right, let me get in. [ laughter ] hey guys, this weekend was theiv 50th annsary of the moon landing. [ cheers and applause its crazy only 12 people have ever set foot on the moon and nobodys been tre since 1972. So its basically the jcenney of space [ laughter ] steve ouch jimmy some Entertainment News everyones talking about the trailer for the new cats movie. Tariq oh, they sure are. [ light laughter ] and now i can finally try out my new segment, tariqs cat corner. Its puurrfect timing. [ light laughter ] d to cut cat corner for weha tonight. Sorry, man tariq oh, i see. [ light laughter ] i guess ill just put all my cat toys away. Jimmy me on, tariq dont be like that well do theegment another time its just tariq another time the cats trailer just came out. Whens it going to be a better time than now . Jimmy look, we have to move on, all right. Tiits like we dont have me tonight. So, im sorry. T we had to cuit tariq its fine. Memories all alone in the moonligh i can smile at the old days jimmy dont do this. Just i was beautiful then jimmy all right, we dont need this, tariq this come on. I remember the time [ laughter ] i kne i knew what happiness was jimmy its mot even cats from tie its generic pictures of cats. Let the memor live again touch m its so easy to leave me all alone with my memories of of my days in the sun if you touch me if i touch yo youll understand what happiness is look a new da has begun [ cheers and applause jimmy well, asto said, were going get to cat corner next week. [ light laughter ] tariq meow [ light laughter ] jimmy hey, guys, this is going viral. Did you see this Shaquille Oneal was in the crowd for a big Music Festival in belgium this weekend. See if you canpot him. [ laughter ] jimmy its like steve what jimmy its lik wa reverse wheresdo. Its called theres waldo. Also, can you imagine being the guy standing behind shaq [ light laughter ] hes like, you got to be kidding me out of 100,000 people, shaq is standing in front of me . ] [ light laught the concert abruptly ended when shaq tried to crowd surf steve oh jimmy very sad [ laughter ] and finally, today, the first trailer came out for the newea mr. Rogers movie, aiful day in the neighborhood. It stars tom hanks and judging by the clip they sent it looks pretty good. Watch this its a beautiful da in this neighborhood a beautiful y for ighbor would you be mine could you be min wont u be m wilson pp [ cheers and ause jimmy we have a great show im going to tell you whos on the show tonight but first, give itvep for the roots, ebody [ cheers and applause [ cheers and applause jimmygreat show tonight two of the funniest men in the world are here david spade is here. Cheers and applause come on jimmy so funny steve hilarious. Jimmy Jeff Foxworthy is rshere tonight [ cheend applause steve what here you go. Ry funny [ cheers and applause i had a great weekend. Birthdayy daughters [ audience aws ] very cute. But it was a hundred it was really it was like 110 degrees. So i was just afraid i didnt want any humans dying steve mishaps, yeah. [ light laughter ] jimmy at my party. Steve yeahat thould have been jimmy because we had a a party and it was great everyone survived, it was really good. But no it was really sweet. She loved it she kind of gets what parties are now. So shes like shes really happy eryone was there and loved the cake and was like kind of shy. It was just great. I asked people, no gifts, because were very spoiled steve right. But people brought gifts anyway, so i played with everythinge and [ lighlaughter ] i mean, it is true though. You do see things that you dont you forget, because you were a a kid. But someone got winnie a a spirograph, do you remember those things steve oh, yeah jimmy you put the colored pens in there and move these gears around and it makes different designs. Steve so great jimmy i played with for like three hours [ laughter ] steve yeah jimmy a great gift i loved it so much but shes great,do and she what ou call it she as of yesterday, her favorite thing was my friend got her a backpack with books in it. And also colored pens and a note pad and she pulled out the note pad, shes like, mom, these are all blank. I get to draw. M gonna start drawing like freaked out about just empty paper. Steve aww. Li [ t laughter ] jimmy i was like, we had a bouncy house. [ laughter ] steve come on. Jimmy come on. But hey, speaking of boo steve whats that . Jimmy our book club, the tonight show summer reads . Steve oh, my god jimmy biggest hit weve ever weve done it. Econd year liug [ la ] st teerve htlast year. Jimmy last year. Steve and way bettere. Han the year befor jimmy we never did it the year before. Much better. Ats why its so [ t laughter ] jimmy already, though, the people voting you guys out there are voting online at more than three times stevelawofow tearsr ye jimmy so its like really a game changer i love su r ry , it. So you guys can vote on what book were all going to read together okay this is real weve done this last year. Steve yeah we read em every year jimmy well, no [ light laughter ] we read them last year steve the last ten years jimmy no, no, no last year was the first year we started thisy, steve exactlhats what i said the first year was two years ago. Jimmy yeah [ light laughter ] and maybe well pick which one which one g no order, im gointo mix them up just no real order here we go, silent patient. Okay check this out this woman is everyone thought Alicia Berenson was a happily married ars st, then she murderr husband. Steve oh jimmy then decides to not talk ever again. Steve wow, thats rude jimmy yeah then you have a psychotherapist that comes in there and tries to get her to talk steve h. Immy and then maybe she does steve maybe she doesnt . [ light laughter ] read it and find out jimmy the silent patient. Steve the silent patien jimmy yeah, yeah this is fleischman is in trouble. This is by taffy brodesserakner, who is a very good writer ive read her stuff in the New York Times magazine stuff like this iher first novel. Its humorous, but its also a a great story. Th its basically, guy fleischman, toby fleischman, his exwife drops the kids off, says, yeah, ill be back. Doesnt come back. steveh. Jimmy so now hes trying to raise these kids and figure out whats going on. Then hes like not sure what his marriage was to begin with whatife was. Yeah [ light laughter ] and its got laughs and fun things in there. The gone dead. Steve ooh. Jimmy yeah, this by chanelle benz. I think this is her firstime novel as well. This is like a mystery one this is a this woman inherits a house, because her dad died years ago but she inherits a house in the south. She es to look at the house, starts talkiand finds out theres a rumor that she was missing or went missing that dayls, ng tcalo steve ooh. Jimmy or Something Like that i dont think she was kidnapped. Steve she just went ssing . Jimmy i didnt read any of these books. Steve right [ laughter ] you havent read them ye why would you read them . Jimmy im saving it for the contest. Steve yeah save them for the contest. Jimmy i know the idea of it steve right. You kn voting on itthe people jimmy correct, yeah. I want to read it with you guys, and really but she finds out she herself went missing on the day her father died. Yeah shes in she doesnt so that will hopefullyrobably tie in [ light laughter ] the gone dead. This is ask again, yes. These are two families live nextdoor to each other in new york, i believe and then they become friends and the kids grow up together. Th something shocking happens. Steve oh jimmy and one of the families have to move away steve cause its so shocking jimmy yeah [ light lahter ] and never to talk to the children cant talk to each other dont talk to me ever again. Steve dont say anything ever jimmy ever again no, well, they are allowed to talk steve well, theyre not its not jimmy thats the silent patient. Steve silent patient. Jimti yeah, silent pat they cant talk again these people can talk steve but they choose not to [ light laughter ] jimmy they choose not to steve they choose not to jimmy they choose not to talk to each other steve refrain from talking to you jimmy dont talk to me steve but ask again, yes . Jimmy no [ laughter ] thats not a good segue. [ applause ] dont clap for that, no. No, no, no, no its not a segueat whappens is the kids, they cant its like a magnet, they cant stay away from each other. Steve cause they grew up together jimmy maybe they might be in love, i dont kw. Steve we dont know. Jimmy it may be so romantic steve it might be so romantic, no ones murdered. [ li jimmy yeah, theres not murder in all of these books steve just a few of them jimmy dont think. All right, so thats ask again, yes. Steve okay jimmy this one is called the chain. Steve boo. Jimmy all right, you ready for this i almost want to have an echo on my voice like, the chainnnnn. This is called the chain. Steve chainnnnnn. [ light laughter ] jimmy this is a thriller check this out steve outtttt. Jimmy your phone rings no, not everything [ laughter ] steve not everyt jimmy i dont want everything turn the echo off. Steve offffff. Jimmy no, im serious. Shut it off f steve offf jimmy turn it off, im being serious. Steve seriousssss. [ light laughter ] jimmy so youre [ fart noise ] [ laughter ] phone rings, the stranger has [ imitating phone ringing no, no, no[ ughter and applause i dont want to do all of this steve im sorry. Im a little hot i went to cape cod im tired re jimmy im gonna ad what the book is about. Steve im not going to say another word sell it. Jimmy a stranger im not selling the book steve im just saying. You dont have many you dont have a horse in the game, right . Jimmy i dont have a dog in the fight. No, these are just fun books i want to read with you. I dont own these books. Steve right. Jimmy i dont option for movies steve no payola. Jimmy nothing. No payola. No one paid me to do this. No, this is just fun steve summer read. Jimmy a stranger has kidnapped your chi teve ooh, child, childddd. [ light laughter ] jimmy a stranger has kidnapped your child to free them, you must abduct soone elses child steve ooh. Jimmy your child will be released when your victims parents kidnap another child youre now part of the chain. Steve chainnnnnn. Jimmy its the chain. , ask agains [ applause ] fleischman is in trouble. Silent patient. And the gone dead. Vote on which book will be this years tonight show summer read go to your local book stores and even pick them up while youre there go to tonightshow. Com summerreads. Vote, or find out whatlyhese books are realbout i give a bad description but thats basically what the idea is. Voting ends this wednesday at noon were going to announce the winning book thursday night on the show steve yeah jimmy its going to be fun [ cheers and applause well be right back with david spade, everybody come on back [ cheers and applause at tmobile, for 40 line for four lines, its all included for the whole family, starting with unlimited data. Use as much as you want, when you want. D you like netflix, its included on us. On plus no surprises our bill. When you want. D taxes and fees are included. And now for a limited time, with each newine, get one of our latest smartphones included. Nl thats right, oy 40 line forith four lines and smartphones are included for the whole family. Dr delivered to your car door so you can do more. More rill. More recharge. More rel. Target run and done. [ soft piano music playing ] mm, uh, what do you do for fun . Not this. Oh, what am into . Mostly progressives name your price tool. Helps people find Coverage Options based on their budget. Flo has it, i want it, its a whole thing, d shes right there. Yeah, shes my ride. This dates lame. He has pics of you on his phone. Theyre very tasteful. He has pics of you on his phone. You know when youre at ross and that cute dress gets even cuter . Yes. Or when bu can say yes. Toh . smiling sure. Or when you find that brand at that price . Are you kidding me . Yeah. Thats yes for less. And thats what ross always has in store. Whoa. sighs yes. Oh, yeah. It feels even better when you find it for less. At ross. sighs yes. Yes for less. Only 1 billionth of 1 is filtered naturally. And emerges crp and refreshing enough to be called deer park 100 Natural Spring water. Born better® need help paying for college . So does. Everyone. Strayer has graduation fund. With tuitionfree classes in your last year. [ cheers and applause jimmy our first guest hosts a new late night show called lights out with david spade which premieres next monday at 11 30 on comedy central. Please welcome the always entertaining, david spade. [ cheers and applause jmy wow. Hey. Hey jimmy thats a nice standing ovation for david spade righ hey jimmy they love you heresh welcome back to th they like us hanging out together jimmy they like us hanging out. Thanks guys. Jimmy todays a special day for all of us because that youre here, first of all. We love having you here. But also, todays your birthday, buddy. Oh, thats right. Jimmy happy birthday [ cheers and applaus happy birthday yeah. Jimmy and you yeah, you dont like to make a big deal of out. No, no big fuss, jimmy. Jimmy what are you going to do do you have any plans . Anything for your birthday oh, we were going to dinner me and you, right . Jimmy yeah youre invited. A jimmy no, me and you going to dinner. Yes, just us. Jimmy i didnt know if you want to tell everybody but yeah yeah, yeah. Were goeng to dinner, and th jimmy were going to go to dinner tonight, wow, im so psyched. I i try to invite anybody rich because [ laughter ] i just want somebody to buy. cause im going to eat and drink a lot and jimmy and youre not paying for it m calling all credit cards beep, beep, beep, beep, beep [ laughter ] jimmy oh, my god i called chris rock, he es, im in toronto. I go, you can call in a credit card [ laughter ]co i mean, you d surprise me. Jimmy yeah but no, its one time, you know, i tried to you know, sandler we always talk about all these names, not to name drop yes to name drop, but also [ laughter ] because of old saturday night live stories. But adam once he always buys me dinner. You know hes a nice guy and his wallets about 10 feet tall. [ light laughter ] and then he has to bend it closedla [ hter ] but we were all out or i was out at dinner at some fancy restaurant and then they go, mr. Sandlers here. And i go, ooh. [ laughter ]do i play it i go, who cares . [ light laughter ] but then, hes got this whole backroom with 15 people, and theyre having some Big Birthday Party or something. So, i go in there, and i do a few thsty bits to get attention. Gross. [ laughter ] and then i come back but then when i leave [ laughter ] it was so sickening im like, im your waiter or whatever. Jimmy yeah, yeah i did that ive done that everyones like [ laughter ] get lost. Jimmy ive done that bit yeah. So i go, all right, and then wht i leave, i go, hey, pu this on, you know, my Discover Card or whatever. So i charge theirs the guy goes, sir, his whole g . Thin i go, yeah. I am on tv sometimes what are you worried about . Ug [ laer ] so he goes, sure you know, and then im like anyway, so the next day identity guard calls me and says someone stole your card. [ laughter ] i go, they did . They go, yeah. [ laughter ] there was some 9,000 dollar dinner last night. [ audience oohs i go, oh, my god. I go, that was me. Theyre like, it couldnt have been youre not that generous. I go, no, i was buzze [ laughter ] jimmy youre not that generous no, no, no, yeah. Jimmy they told you that they knew they could tell. My scrimp weve anne over your tips realized youre a bit of a scrimper. Jimmy no, of course, last time you were here was for your father of the year. Yeah, it was great jimmy father of the year. Thats right it was on netflix. [ cheers and applause it was it was a big hit congrats it wa yeah. They told me once, they go, oh, its the biggest movie in the world for two weeks in a a row. I go, huh . [ laughter i i go, i cant believe it. They go, believe me, we cant believe it. [ laughter ] but they you know, listen, netflix, the way it rks you never know it comes out in all these countries. But i play, like, a boston guy you know jimmy yeahe and so one time wre shooting it, were up, you know, on boston outskirts. Jimmy yeah where im a little more famous and then [ laughter ] jimmy youre more famous on the outskirts . Yeah, yeah. I have an app that tells im like 9 more famous. [ laughter ] dododododo thats where i go, its worth the drive. So were shooting and they give me a minivan so people dont, like, know cause, you know, they know somethings shn. Ting so it blends i and then im sitting in this at, like, midnight and then some lady bangs on the door hey is the superstar in there . [ light laughter ] so, i open it. Im so i open the window about a quarter inch c and i go, hey, what i do for you . [ laughter ] jimmy just peeked your eye out. Hey, man of the