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as these women get closer to freedom, they remain mindful of the fine line between getting out and actually moving on. when i get out of prison, i ll be the kind of person that carries a good job, be the best mother i can be. that s my number one priority, is to be a mother to my child. i cannot bring those children back, i cannot bring the gentleman and his girlfriend back, and i can t wipe the tears of the family members or my own family members. but i can keep trying to move forward and do the best that i can do for others. i ll try to replace it that way. that s the only way i know how. that s what i need to do, is just focus on the fact that in two years i will be out, and maybe there s something i can do on the outside. i want to see the outside. i want to see some beauty. try to forget about this place. ....
The effects ripple on down, and affect so many people that it s unbelievable. the pain will never go away. marta is serving 15 to life. when we spoke to her in 2000, she was convinced that prison was the end of the line but longs to reunite with the family she left behind. i have a very supportive daughter who is 20 who is putting herself through school, and i have a 23-year-old son in iraq right now who should be coming home soon. he s having the hardest time dealing with me being here. and we basically had no communication since i ve been in prison. but i m faithful that god s going to turn that around. i know that god s always there. he wraps his arms around me and comforts me and tells me he s going to see me through this and that he s forgiven me, because i ....
inmates not only have to get used to their new environment, but also the prison routine. a typical day at valley state starts early, at 6:30 breakfast is cooked and served by the inmates under staff supervision. the majority of inmates spend their day in a variety of valley state s educational, vocational or rehabilitation programs where they can earn a high school diploma, learn a trade or cope with anger, addiction and abuse. when i first came to prison, i started fighting at anything. anything you said to me would make me, you know, react. if i felt threatened. most of the time i d end up in cuffs. i had several police tell me you re going to be here until the prison falls down. and through going to groups and therapy, i finally learned that that wasn t the way to do it. i need to learn how to use talking skills instead of my ....
for both women, the isolation of ad seg has provided a chance to reflect on their time behind bars. it was a reality check for me. it was really a reality check. and maybe this is what it took for me to have to realize it. this is not where i want to be. you re told not to be weak in prison. don t be weak in prison. that s a downfall. i don t know how to be strong. i just had that one habit and i just couldn t break away from it, you know? it was like taking away the loneliness. violence and drugs still take their toll inside valley state. darlene acevedo is serving time for petty theft. but as a drug user, she was sent to the ad seg for feeding her addiction on the inside. which led to an attack on another inmate. she s been in ad seg for 21 months. this is the first time i ve been sober in my whole life since i started using drugs since i was 18. ....
And he got very irate and starting beating me up. but when i backed up, his gun was on the counter he carried it once in a while and i picked it up and tried to scare him. he backed off, but then he came at me. and i pulled the trigger, i guess. i really don t remember it clearly. it went off and he died. barbara had more difficulty adjusting to her time in prison than the others. barbara will soon be 71. no. this is not life, i tell you that. you re definitely being punished. that s for sure. it s a nightmare. i still have not gotten over the shock of being here. ....