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The real gabe. >> this is probably going to be some people that i know that are going to think i'm a traitor or whatever. it's pretty refreshing to say i really don't give a [ muted ]. >> it takes a twisted nerve to try to join the hammer skin nation but it takes real courage to walk away from them. >> it's just little stuff that happened that just kind of built that doubt more and more, you know, just grew that seed of disillusion. >> i think the people that stay are afraid. they're afraid to start over. >> i wanted to be me again, not this thuggish skinhead nazi guy. i didn't want to give th...

>> gabe changed the outside but that didn't really change the real gabe. >> there's probably going to be some people that i know that will think i'm a traitor or whatever. it's pretty refreshing to really say i don't give a [ bleep ]. >> there but. >> it takes a kind of twisted nerve to kind of join the hammer skin nation but it takes real courage to walk away from them. >> there's little stuff that happened that just kind of built that doubt more and more, you know, just grew that seed of disillusion. >> yeah. i think the people that stay are afraid. they're afraid to start over. >> yeah. i w...

Because that's not how i really felt inside. >> hate always has consequences. it destroys everything in a person's life, if we let it. >> they tried to kill my child to shut her up. well, guess what, you just magnified her. you need to find in your heart that small shark of accountabiliaccoun accountabili accountability. what is there that i can do to make the world a better place? you take that extra step, that's how you're going to make my child's death worthwhile. i'd rather have my child, but by golly, if i got to give her up, we're going to make it count. >> 30 years ago, i dedicated my