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But im gonna go home, save my cows up, come back. I just want to know how many cows i need. So hes like, who, lisa . Just give me two cows. I said, come on, man. Stop playing. He said, okay, one cow and a porcupine. Its my final offer. I said, man, be serious. He said, just take the bitch. Leave my name is naim. You ever have somebody mess your name up, but then when you correct them, they get mad at you like you did something wrong . How you doing, raheem . Actually, its naim. Well, excuse the hell out of me, naim. I did a show at this college. They had a poster with my name on it. Nobody kne...

[cheers and appl captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. [daily show theme song playing] [cheers and applause] captioning sponsored by Comedy Central jon welcome to the daily show. My name is jon stewart. Man, what a program our guest documentary filmmakers Lori Silverbush and kristi jacobson. Theyve done a documentary on hunger in america that will absolutely anger you but still while you are watching it have some junior mints or something...

[cheers and applause] stephen thats it for the from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. [daily show theme song playing] [cheers and applause] captioning sponsored by Comedy Central jon welcome to the daily show. My name is jon stewart. Man, what a program our guest documentary filmmakers Lori Silverbush and Kristi Jacobson. Theyve done a documentary on hunger in america that will absolutely anger you but still while you are watching it have some junior mints or something. Just to you know. You may be familiar with the new york assemblym...

Jeselnik thanks to nick kroll and pat and oswalt and follow me on twitter and at tc. Com jeselnik and first lets look back at the best moments from tonights show. Hey . Yeah, anthony. What do they say about a bully gay teen on suicide watch . I dont know, anthony. Jeselnik no noose is good noose. [laughter] hey, rick. Yeah, anthony. Jeselnik why didnt christina get an aportion . To make a big splash at prom . Like in the toilet . Jeselnik you got it. Thats a look at this springs hottest dildos. Well be right back. Yeah yeah never forget, good night, kids. Go read a book. [cheers and applause] ...

Im waiting for one of these disgusting pedophiles to say, hey, i dont do threesomes, okay, pal . The good thing about this show is when these pedophiles, and they are creeps, run out of the house, theres like 15 or 20 cops waiting for em. They throw em on the ground, handcuff em, and take em to jail. They cannot get away. Its impossible. Im watching an episode. The guy runs out of the house, theres 15 cops, and theres a cop dressed in a tree outfit. Hes dressed as a tree. In case he gets through the 15 cops, the tree [laughter and applause] as the pedophiles walking up the drive like, wouldnt ...