This. we re asking in the wrong way and nobody s helping us. right? even though we know there are people who want to. we re going about it wrong. yes. i want to talk about the first thing you say here, which is just ask a favor. oh, yeah. actually, that s a really great technique. especially if you don t really know someone well and they have no particular reason to want to help you personally. it turns out if you preface asking for what you want by just saying, would you mind doing me a favor, and then you have to wait, by the way, until they say yes, and then you ask for what you want, that s called precommitment and it almost doubles the rates of helping. so people will actually be much more likely to help because they feel like, well, i already kind of told you that i would. now i m going to feel extra bad if i turn around and say no. it s not a technique you want to use with people you have a relationship with like a colleague, but if you need help from a stranger or a ran ....