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(laughter) and my guest daniel bergner says women's sexual desire matches men's. so now men will be thinking about women thinking about sex every seven seconds, every seven seconds. mayor mike bloomberg unveiled a $20 billion plan to fight climate change it will limit the oceans to no more than 16 ounces. this is "the colbert report." (cheers and applause) (cheers and applause) welcome to the report, everybody. thank you for joining us. >> stephen captioning sponsored by comedy central stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! >> folks, thank you so much, ladies and gentl...

( cheers and applause ). >> john: that's our show. please join us tomorrow night at 11:00. here it is, your moment of zen. >> some guys on their own picking out a political class to go after, that they would do that without-- ( phone ringing ) >> mrs. cheney is giving you a >> stephen: tonight the nsa surveillance program called prism, haven't heard of it? it's heard of you. (laughter) then this travel season the tsa is tracking down, so make sure you don't have anything down your crack. (laughter) and my guest daniel bergner says women's sexual desire matches men's. so now men will ...

cannot live on bread alone but by every word, just chanted by your audience. folks, let's get straight to the story everyone's talking about. the nsa knows what everyone's talking about. (laughter) and according to stunning new articles first published by friend of the show and professional blabbermouth glen greenwald in the u.k.'s the guardian the newspaper, the nsa is also engaging in cybersnooping. >> nsa the national security agency has assets to the central servers to some of the top u.s. technology firms through a program called prism, those firms being microsoft, google, yahoo...

unveiled a $20 billion plan to fight climate change it will limit the oceans to no more than 16 ounces. this is "the colbert report." (cheers and applause) (cheers and applause) welcome to the report, everybody. thank you for joining us. >> stephen captioning sponsored by comedy central stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! >> folks, thank you so much, ladies and gentlemen. you know i need it. you know i need it. (cheers and applause) thanks, please, folks. please, folks, you know, thank you so much. thank you so much for chanting my name. jesus himself said man canno...

to fight climate change it will limit the oceans to no more than 16 ounces. this is "the colbert report." (cheers and applause) (cheers and applause) welcome to the report, everybody. thank you for joining us. >> stephen captioning sponsored by comedy central stephen, stephen, stephen! stephen, stephen, stephen! >> folks, thank you so much, ladies and gentlemen. you know i need it. you know i need it. (cheers and applause) thanks, please, folks. please, folks, you know, thank you so much. thank you so much for chanting my name. jesus himself said man cannot live on bread alone but by...