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Even Michelle Obama can't get Jimmy Kimmel's daughter to eat her veggies

Even Michelle Obama can't get Jimmy Kimmel's daughter to eat her veggies
Screenshot: Jimmy Kimmel Live
Former First Lady Michelle Obama isn’t going to brag about the fact that her best-selling memoir is better-selling than her former President husband’s book. Honestly, it’s not even close, so Mrs. Obama could be even more gracious in victory on Tuesday’s
Jimmy Kimmel Live than usual, instead spending her airtime ragging on Barack in other ways. Apparently, you don’t get credit for not being a slob when you pay someone to tidy up your presidential clutter, and a fancy producer credit doesn’t mean the former head of state actually gets down in the trenches with the puppets in the couple’s new Netflix kids show,

United-states , American , Samin-nosrat , Jeremy-konner , Lionel-richie , Jimmy-kimmel-screenshot , Michelle-obama , Jane-kimmel , Zach-galafianiakis , Lady-michelle-obama , Bruce-springsteen , Netflix

Best Creepshow Episodes Season 1: 6 Essential Shudder Stories

1
The Creep, who introduces each segment via comic-book pages, fondles the remote in key art from season one of Shudder’s
Creepshow.
Image: Shudder
Stacked with killer talent both in front of and behind the camera, Shudder’s hit series
Creepshow—based on the horror anthology films from Stephen King and George A. Romero—returns soon for season two, with a third installment on the way. Each episode contains two stories, so we’re sharing our favorites from the six-episode (plus two bonus installments!) first season.
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1) Grey Matter
The series’ kickoff segment set the tone for what was to come with a classic tale directed by series producer Greg Nicotero that pays loving homage to the first

Stephen-king , Greg-nicotero , Georgea-romero , Creepshow , Kasey-lansdale , Entertainment , Culture , Jordy-verrill , Bob , Splatterpunk , David-brucker

Pamplin Media Group - Libraries shrug off Dr. Seuss book controversy

March 11 2021
Cancel culture? Meh. Librarians used to tough issues, so leaders say they'll seek a community 'balance.'
Dr. Seuss books always tickle
His publisher put some in a pickle
Decision to let books fade isn't so humdrum
Oh no! Oregon libraries face a conundrum
Attempts at mostly clever rhymes aside, when Dr. Seuss' publisher decided to no longer license or sell six particular titles, Oregon's public libraries didn't flinch. They mostly shrugged.
On March 2, Dr. Seuss Enterprises announced that six of the children's books would no longer be published or licensed because they include images and text that "portray people in ways that are hurtful and wrong."

Multnomah , Oregon , United-states , Central-library , California , Washington-county-cooperative-library , Portland , Laytonville , Washington , Oregon-city-public-library , Multnomah-county , American

Failure To Launch is almost a bizarre meta parody of rom-coms

attempt at movie stardom. Parker’s Paula is a “professional interventionist” who helps parents get their unmotivated adult sons to move out of the house by pretending to date them, thereby boosting their confidence. It’s a business she’s dreamed up herself based on her briefly mentioned tragic backstory of having fallen in love with a guy she couldn’t get to move out of
his parents’ house. Not one to let lost love get her down, Paula has channeled her personal disappointment into professional gaslighting—a business model that raises as many logistical questions as it does ethical ones. What happens to the poor guys after she gets them to leave home and then (presumably) dumps them? Did this movie singlehandedly inspire the entire incel movement?

Shanghai , China , Sarah-jessica-parker , Judd-apatow , Terry-bradshaw , Julia-roberts , Tyrel-jackson-williams , Parker-paula , Zooey-deschanel , Kathy-bates , Tripp-mcconaughey , Richard-gere

Matthew McConaughey might run for governor of Texas in 2022

Photo: Joshua Blanchard/Getty Images for NEON
Matthew McConaughey has been a lot of things over the course of various careers: He’s been a beach bum, an immortal wizard, the star of
more. Something that can actually leave a lasting impact on the beautiful big rock we call America, or at least more of a lasting impact than his awards, his millions of dollars, his family, and his aircraft carrier full of classy Lincoln automobiles… something like
politics.
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Yes, if you felt a bone-aching chill run through the air this something, it wasn’t climate change generating another polar vortex. It was, in fact, the haunting echo of another celebrity deciding that their specific set of skills (which include “looking presentable,” “reading,” and “being famous”) would translate perfectly to a career in politics. But hey, it worked out for Ronald Reagan and Arnold Schwarzenegger and Donald Trump, who says it can’t work out for Matthew McConaughey as well? He’s a

Houston , Texas , United-states , America , Stephen-colbert , Donald-trump , Joshua-blanchard-getty , Arnold-schwarzenegger , Matthew-mcconaughey , Ronald-reagan , Entertainment-weekly , Olympics

Literary Critics Praise Unpublished Salinger Novels As Good, But Not 'Go Out And Shoot A Celebrity' Good

Literary Critics Praise Unpublished Salinger Novels As Good, But Not ‘Go Out And Shoot A Celebrity’ Good
HANOVER, NH—Touting the manuscripts as close to the author’s best work, literary critics at Dartmouth College hailed several unpublished J.D. Salinger novels Wednesday as good, but not “go out and shoot a celebrity” good. “Don’t get us wrong, there’s the same wry prose and pitch-perfect characterization of uniquely American individuals that made Salinger into a household name, but if we’re being totally honest, nobody’s going to go out and blow someone’s brain out over these,” said professor Sheila Heidt, noting that the as-yet-unseen works were a “B, maybe a B+” that likely wouldn’t inspire psychotic individuals to do more than hit a celebrity a few times with a tire iron. “Unfortunately, would-be assassins will likely find that the novel’s tendency towards the maudlin and a muddled narrative fail to evoke the passion required to take down a singer or presidential candidate.” Heidt added that among the manuscripts was a sequel to

United-states , American , Sheila-heidt , Dartmouth-college , Franny-and-zooey , Salinger , Entertainment , Culture , Jd-salinger , Zooey , American-writers , Writers

Don Jr. Sends Letter To RNC Begging To Have Likeness Used For Fundraising

PALM BEACH GARDENS, FL—Demanding the organization start at once, Donald Trump Jr. reportedly sent a letter Wednesday begging the Republican National Committee to use his likeness in fundraising materials. “You’re free to use my image as my times as you like in any medium as long as it’s front and center—in fact, I’ve enclosed some good shots right here,” read the letter, which included a variety of glossy 8-by-10-inch photographs for committee officials to consider along with a USB flash drive containing a highlight reel of the former first son speaking at various events. “The one of me on the tree stump is my favorite, but all of the close-ups are pretty cool too. I don’t have anything with my dad though, so I hope that’s okay. Please? Pretty please? Oh yeah, and can you link to my social media too?” At press time, Donald Trump Jr. was excitedly refreshing the RNC’s homepage waiting for his picture to appear.

Republican-national-committee , Donald-trump , Don-jr , Donald-trump-jr , American-people-of-german-descent , Presidents-of-the-united-states , Melania-trump , United-states , Business-people , Trumpism , The-onion

Key Takeaways From The Capitol Security Review

A task force convened to address security at the U.S. Capitol Building following the January 6 riot released a report on Monday. The Onion looks at the key takeaways from the Capitol security review.

Mitt-romney , Mike-pence , Capitol-police-board , Quick-reaction , National-guard , Quick-reaction-force , United-states , Krav-maga , Far-right-politics-in-the-united-states , Qanon , Riot , Articles

Sellers Charging Thousands for Dr. Seuss Books

As Fox News continues to remind everyone, six books by Dr. Seuss were pulled from circulation by the fake doctor’s estate over racist depictions and language. The titles of these books are largely irrelevant because the big three, Cat in the Hat, Green Eggs and Ham, and Oh the Places You’ll Go are all still for sale, and children of this generation are not exactly clamoring for Dr. Seuss’s deep cuts. But still, there is a wave of inexplicable anger over what is being touted as the cancellation of Dr. Seuss—a man who is literally dead and could not care less what happens with his books. But adults are dumb and instead of letting six books that they themselves had no plan to read wither and die, some are selling the last remaining copies of these books for thousands of dollars, according to the Toronto Star.

Toronto , Ontario , Canada , Scott-olson-getty , Facebook , Horton-hears , Profit-off-manufactured-outrage , Scott-olson , Getty-images , Fox-news , Green-eggs , Writers

Hulu adds 90s teen shows Felicity, My So-Called Life, Blossom

The party starts with
Blossom, which aired on NBC for five seasons from 1991 until 1995. The cast included Mayim Bialik, Joey Lawrence, Michael Stoyanov, Jenna von Oy, and Ted Wass. Bialik played 15-year-old Blossom Russo, who has to learn to adapt to a big change when her mother leaves the family to focus on her career. She dreams of a sitcom fantasy mother and frequently gets advice from famous celebrities.
Blossom will begin streaming on March 8, followed immediately by
Felicity on March 9.
Felicity is actually returning to Hulu after some time off from the streamer. The J.J. Abrams-created teen drama which ran for four seasons from 1998 to 2002 on The WB, and starred Keri Russell, Scott Speedman, and Scott Foley. It centered on Felicity Porter during her time studying in a university in New York City. The show gained immense popularity for its love triangles and Russell’s performance. Hulu is also adding

New-york , United-states , Hollywood , California , Americans , Felicity-porter , Scott-speedman , Michael-stoyanov , Joey-lawrence , David-arquette , Bess-armstrong , Jared-leto