Hurricane Desantis News Today

[cheers and applause] thank you, thank you for receiving us with open arms. even if they are covered with black sabbath tattoos and number 77 sunscreen. lets cover some news before we go to the monologue. an american who was trapped in ukraine for eight months says he evaded russian troops by prevpretending to be irish. in other words, he was drunk. comedian gallagher sadly has passed away at age 76. his family scheduled a private ceremony. followed by smashing him with a giant hammer....

The Happiest Place on Earth has some lessons for the would-be president in his fight with Disney.

The Happiest Place on Earth has some lessons for the would-be president in his fight with Disney.

Just not about her eyebrows. it gives her that surprised look on her face, like when you accidentally sit down on the childs toy. i said accidentally. or maybe shes as shocked as we are that she won. if those brows got any higher, theyll turn into wings. she is the embodiment of the flaw in the lefts thinking for everything they think should be a negative of florida, its something people wear proudly like a red, white, and blue speedo. for example, when governor desantis entered in the ban lockd...

The actual delivery question tell my got murdered. tyrus, after the hurricane desantis had, a very brief solution. a reminder that looters get shot. this wasnt after a hurricane, this was an ongoing consistent problem that weve given up on. any solutions? >> i live in louisiana and i didnt need ron desantis to tell me that because we also carry. and we sometimes if you step in my house unannounced, shoot first and hide the body later. i think that message was resoundingly clear to criminals. lik...

Pizza? because it chicago, the actual delivery person got murdered. [applause] so tyrus, you know, after the hurricane desantis had a very brief solution it was a reminder that leaders get shot, this is not like after a hurricane, just an ongoing consistent problem that we have kind of given up on, any solutions? >> you know, i live in louisiana and i did not need ron desantis to tell me that, because we also carry. and we sometimes if you step in my house unannounced shoot first and hide the bo...