Page 4 - Network Designed Data News Today

And zyrtec® is different than claritin. Because it starts working faster on the first day you take it. Zyrtec®. Muddle no more™. Have ohare party repair remove them. And install tostitos cantina chips and salsa. Guaranteed to bring that south of the border je ne sais quoi to any occasion tostitos. Bring the party. Jon thats our show here it is, your moment of zen. The doctor put president obamas coffee cup salute on the couch. As a psychiatrist we may see these things unfolding, these episod...

Thank you for joining us. My name is jon stewart. Tonights guest, actress emma stone is going to join us. A couple actors talking. All right. One actor talking. [laughter] but first, the real question is this what time is it . Did you really just shout party time . You didnt recognize im setting up a bit of a routine here . [laughter] just got out of college, just a reflex. What time is it . Party time a little bit quiet now. A little bit quiet now. You may be thinking to yourself, time have the...

Those democrats. Its a highstakes election year. There is so much at stake. The stakes this year couldnt be higher. The stakes are stunning. Jon they are the most beautiful stakes ive ever seen. laughter jon i offer you 1 million for just one night with those stakes. laughter so just a few races will decide who run congresss upper housement and they are the subject of tonightsed race to get filibusters. Now perhaps the one person who stands to benefit most from shifting Senate Control is Current...

Thank you, folks. Thats great. Before we get started, i understand your enthusiasm, ladies and gentlemen, dont get me wrong, i understand. But ladies and gentlemen, before we get started i cust want to address the horrible tragedy in the ukraine. Earlier today a Malaysian Airline flight carrying 295 passengers and crew crashed apparently brought down by a missile. It is an unthinkable loss an our thoughts and prayers are with everyone affected by this senseless act. And there is more trouble in ...

Tonight i would like to kick things off with a hot shot, a pick me up from what i like to call Stephen Colberts smile file. Tonight on the smile file tyrannical north korean dictator kim jungun. Folks, this mad man lives a constant state of stern disapproval. But even before he came to power young un made no time for frivolity. Just listen to this actual cnn interview with his old border schoolroom mate from switzerland. Did you go out in the night, you never go out, on disco or make party, neve...

Captioning sponsored by Comedy Central captioned by Media Access Group at wgbh access. Wgbh. Org eagle caw stephen tonight, the midterm elections are on november 4th. Or if youre a democrat, november 7th laughter then, america reaches a milestone. Though it had to use one of those reachergrabbers. laughter and my guest, Walter Isaacson, has a new book about the history of your computer it had to be your history because i always clear mine. laughter netscape navigator launched 20 years ago today,...

If you remember tyou werent there, man. laughter that was woodstock. Anyway, it tanked the economy. Well, when was the last time you got good and angry about it . Want to . laughter all right. You asked for it. Remember how we gift wrapped 184 billion to insurance giant a. I. G. To purchase that companys terrible mortgage bets so that their incompetence wouldnt become a global extinction event . laughter . We just got the thank you not. Former American International group Hank Greenberg is suing...

Report. cheers and applause captioning sponsored by Comedy Central cheers and applause stephen, stephen, Stephen Stephen, stephen, Stephen Stephen, stephen, Stephen Stephen, stechb, Stephen Stephen, stephen, Stephen Stephen, stephen, stephen cheers and applause welcome to the report, everybody. Good to have you with us in here, out there, all around the world. Nation, theres a lot to talk about. But of course, of course folks i have to start tonight with a Shocking International incident that ha...

Where israel what . Israel isnt supposed to defend itself . [both speaking at once] a 4,000yearold conflict. [bleeped] selfhating jew. [laughter] jon jon that was weird. [laughter] anyway, what i was saying was last thursday saw the start of a new ground offensive launched by israel. [both speaking at once] [bleeped] [laughter] jon um, holy [bleeped]. Look, obviously there are many strong opinions on this issue, but just merely mentioning israel or questioning in any way the effectiveness or hum...

Go home not our problem. If obama likes them so much, let them stay at the white house. [laughter] jon thats an interesting suggestion. Although a grown man inviting thousands of kids to his house gives off a bit of a neverland ranch vibe. [laughter] all right. So look, its not like these countries developed problems overnight. Why the sudden kidsplosion . Republicans point to the president s 2012 order theyre protects children from deportation, but that applies only to those who enter the Unite...