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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20160512

Arrrrrr rrr look, kyle, cartman is totally miserable, even more miserable than he was before, because hes had his dream and lost it. Its not fair its not fair. I wanna die i wanna die you are up there. Captioning by captionmax www. Captionmax. Com from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is daily show with trevor noah. cheers and applause captioning sponsored by Comedy Central trevor thank you so much. Welcome to the daily show. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Im trevor noah. My guest tonight from fivethirtyeight. Com, nate silver is here, everybody. Lets get straight into it with an international controversy. The queen of england, known mostly for her hat collection and her 1975 hit single Bohemian Rhapsody yesterday got into a spot the trouble. We begin with a private conversation at a garden party thats causing an international commotion. Talk about an embarrassing international incident, Queen Elizabeth caught on camera criticizing the chinese government. Tre

Transcripts For COM Bad News Bears 20160402

cool rock theme playing dog barks nice. Sorry good catch. Boys, lunch is ready. There you go. squeaking woman gasps screaming aint no doubt about it, lady. You got a load of rats down there. gasps woman whimpering damn, is it 3 00 . I gotta get outta here. But, wait, what about my basement . Well, just call and make a followup appointment. Its no problem. But. You. Oh, sh oh upbeat, cheerful theme playing boy hey, go to first, go to first man fire fire nice throw. Boy 2 hey, hey over here, over here man much faster. Go to the ball, go to the ball. Here we go. Couple more. Boy 3 throw it, second base boy 4 throw it. Man safe. team chattering boy cover the bag, cover the bag. Man bring it in. Here you go. team chattering motorcycle approaching ahhh. Got one of those for me . Nice try, you little creep. Mr. Buttermaker. Mr. Buttermaker. Youre late. I got held up, sorry about that. Are you drinking . Oh, hell, no. Thats, uh. Nonalcoholic. Im drivin, you know. laughs oh. Im so sorry. You he

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