i would like to welcome a first time guest. you are probably following one of his 400 parity twitter accounts. bill schulz thinks he is on a date with michelle beatle right now. and sitting next to me is the co anchor of fox and friends. it is brian kilmead. i am violating a court order by being this close to him. and his readers are leaving because his words are deceiving. it is our "new york times" correspondent. good to see you, pinch. >> ahoy first time viewers. i am the cory spawn department who also -- correspondent who happens to be at "new york times." i talk about distributing the wealth and the cultural race as the american self and the organic neatness of brooklyn. i am commentary on what the gray lady actually is, or a parity of how the right view t.z and also, i am drunk. one too many after work jim fizzies for me i'm afraid. all the news that's fit to news, burp. >> never not, not funny.