had a huge impact on me because he writes about the pressures to write with certain tonality when you're writing about war, whether it's writing with irony or writing with sentimentality or overreference. certainly as a civilian, treading on that subject overreserverence. treading on that subject is a little scary. there are phenomenally talented warriors coming from these wars that are starting to write fiction about it. i think my father feeling that connected gave me the courage to try something i otherwise would have probably said oik i'm up to that. >> speaking of your father. in the sort of at the end of the last segment, i talked about his secret past and when you came on the set, you said there's a distinction between secret versus nondiscussed. talk about that and talk about why -- you said before you were a narcissistic teenager. do you think if you had asked him, what he discuss it with
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