I read today best buy and target are planning to stop selling cds in their stores to which i say best buy and target are still selling cds for those too young to remember cds are shiny discs that would get scratched almost immediately and would sit in a binder of the backseat of the car until you sold the car. If the store stopped selling them cds may not be around any longer, kind of said first cd i bought was elvis electronic spike i bought that and six disc changer only had one but three days later someone stole it all. I saved up for two years to get a new stereo with a cd changer and when i did i went and bought spike again. Was the first and second cd i ever bought. Because i had to get the monkey off my back. By the way, did you hear about what happened with rob gronkowski. Rob gronkowski of course is the tight end for the new england patriots. The patriots lost the super bowl on sunday [ cheers and applause ] i didnt mean to start a fight. It just happened. And to make it worst white gronkowski was on the field someone broke into his house and literally robbed gronkowski which is terrible. Kind of smart, they knew he wasnt home because he was playing. They were probably watching him only the tv they were stealing. They should be charged with burglary and unsportsman like conduct. Got to hope they find him. They took his safe. His gun. They took his book. I hope when they catch the guy they drop him in the cage with gronk like a lion but best wishes to rob gronkowski. Rob, during the super bowl, this is why i leave my valuables in cleveland with the browns, never a worry there. [ cheers and applause ] this is a special video a sports anchor in tulsa, oklahoma, apparently lifelong eagle fan either than or hes emotionally unstable. Okay. Late break yes they won it, they won it yes ah they did it [ cheers and applause ] its just, l. A. Thunder. Oh. [ laughter ] get it together man. Thats my god [ cheers and applause ] i think he won the oscar for best supporting actor or something. By the way if its that big of an affair shouldnt he have been watching the super bowl. Congratulations to him i guess. President trumps legal team is now reportedly trying to put the breaks on a looming interview with special Counsel Robert Mueller according to the times Trump Lawyers are worried he could be lying too much to vest gators and they base their concern on everything hes ever said and done over the course of his life [ cheers and applause ] donald trump is like the bus from speed if he doesnt tell 60 lies an hour he blows up. Fried chicken and cheeseburgers everywhe everywhere. Trump been bragging to members of the staff that he would clear it up if he spoke to mueller and now his lawyers basically their es excuse is the president cant testify because theres a chance he might lie under oath. Like a pickpocket cant go to court because theres a chance he could steal the judges wallet. Trump said he doesnt have time, he has fox and friends and more. If you are Donald Trumps lawyer are you more about him lying or telling the truth. Its kind of a loselose, if you think about it. Meantime president released special message to honor his favorite month of all of them, black history month. I think you are absolutely fantastic. Thank you. But youre fired. Oh, i think thats sweet, you know. [ cheers and applause ] absolutely, fantastic. Meanwhile, in south korea, Winter Olympics start thursday. Vice president , mike pence will be there for Opening Ceremony but is leaving after that so he doesnt have to see biathlon he believes athlon should be between one man and one woman. [ cheers and applause ] the president s daughter ivanka trump headed to pyeongchang to lead the ceremony. Choosing them to represent the United States wasnt easy. They had a meetmeeting, who are least necessary people in the white house, there was a lot of competition but mike and ivanka won out, and theyre going [ cheers and applause ] you know what might be making a come back the noro virus. About 1200 members of the Olympic Security Team if any of the athletes get the virus could affect their performance in the village sex party. [ laughter ] imagine competing in this event with diarrhea. [ laughter ] i mean you would definitely want to be the first guy down. In other major world news kylie jenner revealed the name of her new born daughter. Could i get a drum roll. And her name is stormy. So if you have ever wondered whether or not the kardashians are keeping up with current events, they are not. So far parentingkwiez shes wise shes 0 for one. Going to be awkward conversation one day, mommy did you name me after a lady who had sex with the president , honey dont be silly i named you after a shade of eye shadow i like [ cheers and applause ] very good reminder, before you give your baby a name google it. Okay. Apple has something new and terrifying on the way. Soon will be able to track all medical information on the iphone. Apple is like we already know this stuff we are just asking your permission. To help keep track of medical history. And to let the guy at the genius bar know you have herpes. Part of me likes the idea of tracking my medical history but part of me doesnt. Imagine what it would be like if siri was your doctor. [ cheers and applause ] hey siri. What can i help you with . Thanks foreseeing me. Ive been a little under the weather. The weather in los angeles is currently clear skies with zero percent chance of rain. No im saying, siri i dont feet well. Feel well. I have a pain in my side. Youre concerned about penis size. [ laughter ] i found several pills that can help. A little. I have a pain right here it hurts when i press it. Prostate. Got it. Remove your pants and bend over the table [ laughter ] no, no, siri this pain has absolutely nothing to do with my prostate. Okay. Prostitute. I found five prostitutes in your area. Tap one to call. No. You know i dont want to call them. Can you give me something for the pain, as pirn or tylenol. Okay toad pide pods. No. Can i help you with anything. No siri thank you for the tide pods. Im just going to stay here. I dont know why. I feel like it. You just walked in on a lily tomlin sketch. All right. Well when we come back we got a story about a girl, one of the smartest girl scouts in American History and a lot of other stuff too. And were going to eat some tide pods everybody, there you go. Well be right back. [ cheers and applause ] if you told me a ye announcer Abcs Jimmy Kimmel live brought to you by progressive. I discovered the true meaning of paperless discounts. And the indescribable rush of saving drivers an average of 620. Why does fear feel so good . I fell in love three times once with a woman, once with a country, and finally. With myself. So, do you have anything to declare or not . Isnt that what im doing . So, do you have anything to declare or not . Nosy neighbor with a glad bag, full of trash. What happens next . Nothing. Only glad has febreze to neutralize odors for 5 days. Guaranteed. Even the most perceptive noses wont notice the trash. Be happy. Its glad. Directv has been rated 1 in Customer Satisfaction over cable for 17 years running. But some people still like cable. Just like some people like banging their head on a low ceiling. Drinking spoiled milk. Camping in poison ivy. Getting a papercut. And having their arm trapped in a vending machine. But for everyone else, theres directv. For 1 rated Customer Satisfaction over cable, switch to directv and get a 200 reward card. Call 1. 800. Directv whoa. on baby monitor weve got a situation here. Ive never seen anything like that. Will you get my phone, please . Youre not taking a picture of that . No, i want to video chat with a doctor cooing grunt oh clattering toys clicking, buzzing whoa. straining im okay. Need a doctor after hours . Unitedhealthcare can help. See a doctor right on your phone, right from your home. Is that normal . Thats normal for a new baby. And what about him . Hey, doc. Doctor thats normal for a new parent. Unitedhealthcare. Doctor thats normal for a new parent. Jimmy hi there. Welcome back to the show. Sam rockwell and miranda kerr and music from awolnation is on the way. But first you know its girl scout cookie season right now and allow me to present the 2018 nominee for girl scout salesperson of the year. Cellphone video shows a nineyearold selling Girl Scout Cookies out of a wagon near a marijuana dispense airy she sold 312 boxes in six hours. [ cheers and applause ]. Jimmy thats 52 boxes an hour, brilliant. You sell cookies on the way in, and by the time they came out already forgot they bought cookies. The store posted the picture ant prompted to see if she broke any rules only rules should be whether shes old enough to be president of the girl scouts [ cheers and applause ] marijuana as many know is legal now in Southern California in the state of california for reck re aitional use and ive been smelling a lot of recreation in our neighborhood every day. With that time to play a game called whos cousin sal is out front of the theater do you detect any high people. Yes, i do smell some cannabis down this way. Heres how we play the game we bring in three contestants one is high the other two are not. Our job is to determine whether they smoke pot or not. Lets bring in the first group. There they are. Okay. All right. Well, lets see now. Hi, whats your name . Daniel. Yeah i saw that on your tag. Daniel where you from . Im from melbourne. Jimmy okay. Can we get closer in on daniels eyes so i can have a look. You have beautiful blue eyes daniel. Thank you jimmy. Jimmy not much i dont see any red in there really. Daniel, what did you have for lunch today . Had a panini. Jimmy how many of them . One. Jimmy okay. I dont think its daniel. Lets move on to the center. Hello adrian. How you doing jimmy. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy good, do people still say yo adrian or is that past now. Thats past, like last month. Jimmy yeah . What do you do for a living adrian. Im a truck driver. Jimmy all right do you get tested. No, i do not. Jimmy you do not. Okay. All right. All right, i guess before i decide its you we should talk to sharon for a second. Hi jimmy. Jimmy hi sharon, how are you . Real good. [ cheers and applause ] sharon, are you from st. Louis. Yes i am. Im on vacation. Jimmy yeah have you been to one of our medical marijuana shops since you been here . I have not. Jimmy well then im going to say its adrian, got to be, adrian are you high . No jimmy . Jimmy what whoa sharon are you high. No i am not. Jimmy wait a minute, daniel, youre the one. [ cheers and applause ] yes. You cant see it but hes been chewing on his tongue for few minutes. Heres thin mints everybody. Jimmy Girl Scout Cookies everybody. Lets bring in one more group to see how it goes. Wow that was. Oh, my god. Now wait are you guys twins. Do you know each other. Nah. [ laughter ] jimmy well, geez. I feel like im high now. Thats good. Jimmy when you saw each other youre like lets hang out all the time. Every day. Jimmy bobby where you from. Im from philadelphia. Jimmy hey congratulations. Thank you. Jimmy were you happy, were you watching the super bowl. Yeah i was watching it. Jimmy seem pretty fired up what do you do for work brobby. Im an artist i make paintings and artwork at home. Jimmy where else would you make them. Anywhere i want. Jimmy okay. All right. Lets keep going, now aaron what do you do for work aaron. Im a rapper. Jimmy where you from . Florida. Palm beach. Jimmy you feel its important for a rapper to enjoy the ganja from time to time. Yeah i think so, it helps me. I like it. Jimmy okay. All right. And finallierica, hello, where you from. From alberta, washington. Were you on the price is right today . Im not at liberty say skbroo wow were you contestant potentially. I was in the building. Jimmy did you touch drew carrie today. I tried to but security grabbed me. Jimmy all right off the bat i would say no way its erica and everybody tries to trick me and its probably erica and i got these two guys here. [ laughter ] well. Erica what do you do for work . Im a finance manager. Jimmy okay. Well your eyes look clear. Okay. Lets take one last pass. Take a look. [ laughter ] ah, geez, its got to be aaron. Aaron, its got to be aaron. No offense to bobby you look high too. No offense we out here pretty medicated. Jimmy aaron are you high . I might be, yeah im medicated. Jimmy we have prizes. There you go. Crayons. Dont eat those aaron. Those are not a snack. All right. Thank you very much. Wow what a game that is, huh. We ought to get that in primetime, you know. We have music from awolnation, miranda kerr is here, well be right back with sam rockwell. [ cheers and applause ] announcer portion of Jimmy Kimmel Live are brought to you by and fill it with music. Om so if you want to feel all the layers of that acoustic version you love. song by sylvan esso . Or if you just want to bump the bass. Hey google, play that song thats like. You might not ever come down. song by Anderson Paak use it with spotify or youtube music. And then ask it hey google, turn it all the way up. Introducing google home max. Part of the google home family. When this guy got a flat tire in the middle of the night. Hold on dad. Liberty did what . Yeah, Liberty Mutual 24hour roadside assistance helped him to fix his flat so he could get home safely. My dad says our insurance doesnt have that. Dont worry i know what a lug wrench is, dad. Is this a lug wrench . Maybe . You can leave worry behind when liberty stands with you™. Liberty stands with you™. Liberty mutual insurance. Jimmy sometimes a lot of the more successful actors, sam rockwell did this, they have a hat made like its just my eczema again,t. But its fine. Yeah, its fine. You ok . Eczema. Its fine. Hey hi arent you hot . Eczema again . Its fine. I saw something the other day. Eczema exposed. Your eczema could be something called atopic dermatitis, which can be caused by inflammation under your skin. Maybe you should ask your doctor . Go to eczemaexposed. Com to learn more. We can now repair complex at saortic aneurysmsare, without invasive surgery. If we can do that, imagine what we can do for varicose veins. And if we can precisely treat eye cancer with minimal damage to the rest of the eye, imagine what we can do for glaucoma, even cataracts. If we can use dna to diagnose the rarest of diseases, imagine what we can do for the conditions that affect us all. Imagine what we can do for you. [ cheers and applause ] jimmy welcome back. Tonight on the show shes a mod eligib model, miranda kerr is here and musical guest awolnation on the mercedesbenz stage. Tomorrow jairus byrd rose byrne and Richard Jenkins will join us and real life and ellen pompeo and elise trouw so join us then. Next honored for oscar for his war three billboards outside ebbing, missouri which is in theaters, please welcome sam rockwell [ cheers and applause ] jimmy now im happy to have you here. I feel like i know you because we have mutual friend whos talk about you all the time. Yeah like jen talk, krzyzewski. Yeah John Krzyzewski talked about you for solid hour the other night. Fabulous hes a great man. Jimmy great to have you here you did a fantastic job in that movie as well. [ cheers and applause ] thanks man. Thanks. Jimmy i dont know if you know this but youre the heavy favorite as far as gambling goes youre the heavy favorite to win the oscar do you feel like the heavy favorite . I feel blessed to be part of this Incredible Group of actors, you know, its plumber, defoe, i work with defoe, Richard Jenkins is buddy of mine, woody harrellson is a buddy of mine. Jimmy you worked with him on another movie. Yeah. Jimmy do you worry you might cancel each other out because youre in the same movie. Possible, sure. Jimmy is he competitive because woody is very competitive. Woody is competitive yes. Jimmy is he competitive in this kind of thing or would you want to beat you more in arm wrestling match than for the oscar. You know whats that . Jimmy feel he would be more interested in winning flip cup than winning oscar. You know how he got white men cant jump wasnt a movie star at the time and he had to play full court to get the part and he can play, he got after it, he got the part. There you go. Jimmy maybe you guys can do that whoever wins the basketball game wins the oscar. I suck at basketball. Jimmy is there a area you may beat woody. Maybe hoofing, maybe dancing. Jimmy that would be fantastic. You are a good dancer. I think woody is a good dancer too, basketball is kwiend of like dancing. Jimmy will you bring an acceptance speech to the oscars with you. I think you got to have bullet points in case. Jimmy written down or in your head. I dont know ive been writing down scribbles, cant even read it. Jimmy dont want to forget certain people. No i may have the crutch in case. Jimmy yeah theres nothing sadistic sadder than people going home after not winning and taking off their clothes finding that acceptance speech i always imagine what a great Coffee Table Book that would be. That may happen. Jimmy youre doing very well. Thank you. Jimmy not only are you getting great reviews from critics, et cetera, but this is from the New York Times put that up on the screen. Got great marks in the comments section of New York Times. Ers of Pete Rockwell wrote this i would love it if another actor played dixon but not quite as much [ cheers and applause ] i think thats my old man. [ laughter ] jimmy he didnt run it by you before he posted this . No i think he just did it. Hes a fighter. Jimmy how old is your dad . Hes like 73. He rides his bicycle 15 sometimes 20 miles a day. Jimmy wheres he going. Exactly from culver city to santa monica, his new wife lives there they have two different places, they are newly married. Jimmy how newly married . Just got married about six months ago. Was a wild wedding. Jimmy was it were you the best man. Was a lot of fun. I was the best man. There were wedding crashers. Jimmy like with real wedding crashers or vince vaughn and owen wilson. I wish those guys were there. It was real wedding crashers very exciting and thrilling. Jimmy did you throw them out. I think jim got that job. Jimmy why didnt he get that job. Hes very sensitive but hes tough. We figured he is the best guy he went in like super co, he said listen, this is cool i want to know how you guys did you come here