Here we choochoochoose to believe in the constitution. Isnt that bananas . Yeah hey, its the loch ness monster. I had a perfect phone call. Oh, boy. Im full of steam. But hes full of whistle blowing its the late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight in syrias trouble. Plus, stephen welcomes ronan farrow and Andrea Savage featuring jon batiste and stay human. And now, live on tape from the ed sullivan theater in new york city, its Stephen Colbert cheers and applause stephen come on wooo hi we made it we made it nice perfect thank you, everybody. Please, have a seat. Ladies and gentlemen, one and all, welcome to the late show. Im your host, Stephen Colbert. Well it is another yet, yet another bewildering day in america up is down, right is wrong, trump is president. Ill tell you one thing, you have got to hand it to the guy, hes willing to call his most disastrous blunders his greatest victories. If he were in charge of the hindenberg, it would have sounded like this and the back motors are just holding enough to keep it in place. And another ontime arrival oh, the victory stephen case in point trumps complete betrayal of our kurdish allies after his phone call with turkish president erdogan. This is so despised on both sides of the aisle that the house voted to condemn trumps actions 35460. That is the sort of bipartisanship you only see in, like, naming a post office. In fact, Congress Just approved the Donald Trumps syria policy sucks forever stamp. Now, it can be cheers and applause it can be it can be argued that getting out of the endless wars in the middle east is not a bad thing. I understand that part. But the way trump did this, make no mistake who wins here his buddy vladimir putin, who yesterday met with erdogan to carve up syria like a christmas shawarma. So, naturally, this morning trump gave a selfcongratulatory speech from the white house and claimed others were congratulating him, too. Todays announcement validates our course of action with turkey that only a couple of weeks ago were scorned. And now people are saying wow, what a great outcome. Congratulations. Stephen as trump yes, a lot of people are saying, wow, what a great outcome. Congratulations specifically, erdogan and putin. They keep saying it to each other and giggling. Then immediately he took the congratulations back. People are saying wow, what a great outcome. Congratulations. Its too early to me to be congratulated, but weve done a good job. Weve saved a lot of lives. Stephen as trump please, people, i just made up. Its too early to congratulate me. Oh, what . You already got me this cake i ordered for myself . laughter wow. What a great outcome. Congratulations. Now, trump declared a Permanent Peace in the region, kind of, sort of. The government of turkey informed my administration that they would be stopping combat and their offensive in syria and making the ceasefire permanent, and it will, indeed, be permanent. However, you would also define the word permanent in that part of the world as somewhat questionable. laughter stephen way to undercut yourself during an announcement. as trump we have achieved Permanent Peace by which i mean, a very temporary peace. That is my promise by which i mean, my suggestion. Really just spitballing here. Point is, wars over. Lets go forcibly kiss a nurse in times square. And trump made one thing clear this is our fake victory, and were not sharing this was an outcome created by us, the United States, and nobody else. No other nation, very simple. Stephen as trump just remember, when you write it down in the history books, it was my idea, and mine alone, to give turkey and russia everything they wanted. laughter then trump bragged about this new buffer zone between the Turkish Border and the kurds. We are achieving a much more peaceful and stable area between turkey and syria, including a 20milewide safe zone. An interesting term, safe zone. Thats the term we are using. Hopefully, that zone will become safe. Thousands and thousands of people have been killed in that zone over the years. laughter laughter stephen that doesnt actually sound that safe. Mayba maybe we should call it the danger zone. I hear theres a highway that goes straight to that. Trump spoke about his decision to abandon American Allies like a goth poetry teen. Let someone else fight over this longbloodstained sand. Stephen fun fact bloodstained sand also the paint swatch they use for trumps face. laughter cheers and applause its a good match. Jon similar color. I see that. Stephen then trump praised our kurdish allies for retreating to an area that our enemies told us it was okay. The american delegation negotiated the original fiveday ceasefire that ended kurdish fighters to safely leave. It just got them to a point where, frankly, they were able to it enabled them to get out, to go and move, really, just a few miles in a slightly different direction. laughter stephen so we lost them . We dont know where as trump the kurds got out, but i will never, ever get out of this sentence, which is going tremendously, by the way, a lot of people calling up and saying, wow, great sentence. Congratulations on such a subjectverb gumbo. The president gumbo, right, jon . The president assured the public the president assured the public that isis prisoners have been contained you know, ish. General masloom has assured me that isis is under very, very strict lock and key. And the detention facilities are being strongly maintained. There were a few that got out, a small number, relatively speaking. Stephen what . Hold on. A few got out . Then they arent under strict lock and key i wouldnt send my toddler to a daycare that advertises children are safe under lock and key. A few got out, but a very small number, relatively speaking. laughter applause of course theyll clean that up. Of course, trumps focus on the disaster in syria is just a transparent attempt to distract us from the disaster of his impeachment. Things got way worse yesterday, thanks to a bombshell testimony from former ambassador to ukraine and guy cornering you at a party to tell you about recumbent biking its more efficient bill taylor. Ill tell you all about it in tonights edition of don and the giant impeach. I made a perfect call. Not a good call. A perfect call. laughter stephen the big headline from yesterdays testimony was that taylor directly tied trump to ukraine quid pro quo. Not only is that incredibly damning, its also the vocal warm up i use before the show every night. Ukraine quid pro quo, ukraine quid pro quo. Zelensky portendskys the end of your presidensky. cheers and applause red leather, yellow leather. Amidst the mist of frost. Florida representative Debbie Wasserman schultz described taylors testimony, its like if you had a big, 1,000piece puzzle on a table. This fills in a lot of the pieces of the puzzle. Okay, i get the analogy, but isnt it more like a childs sevenpiece puzzle of a squirrel, and we just got one piece atshe ente squirrel. Everything else is tree, and its just all nuts. After in there. Now, after taylors testimony, the white house released this statement, President Trump has done nothing wrong. This is a coordinated Smear Campaign from farleft lawmakers and radical, unelected bureaucrats waging war on the constitution. Yes bill taylor is just a radical, unelected bureaucrat i mean, look at the pinko who appointed him mike pompeo. Okay okay, but this was his second time as ukrainian ambassador. The first time he served, he was appointed by radical lefty george w. Bush. Okay, fine. But who originally gave him a job in the state department . None other than deep state kommisar Ronald Reagan okay, but may i remind you, i am all out of arguments. Checkmate. Now, trumps allies applause trumps allies also jumped to his defense, including former acting attorney general and lex loser, matt whitaker. laughter whitaker went on the fox and news and said this im a former prosecutor, and what i know is, this is a perfect time for preliminary hearings where you would say, show us your evidence. What evidence of a crime do you have . I mean, the constitution sort of you know, abuse of power is not a crime. Stephen we at the late show wanted to make sure we got the legal facts right, so we hired a team of 15 researchers and gave them all day to look into this. And while they were on the way to the office, i googled it on my phone, and it turns out that, yeah, abuse of power is definitely a crime. Also, fun fact, in the federalist papers, Alexander Hamilton wrote that one cause for impeachment is the abuse or violation of some public trust. Thats coming straight from hamilton. So trump might be impeached and win a tony cheers and applause look at that. Jon look at it. Stephen winwin. Another trump defender was california congressman devin nunes, who said this of taylors testimony ive defined it as watching a slowmotion crazy train that is going into impeachment fantasyland looking for the loch ness monster. Stephen which is funny, because ive defined nunes as watching an insane jetski careening off of Jackass Mountain into mixed metaphor lake. laughter now the g. O. P. The gop the g. O. P. Is having so much trouble defending trumps behavior that today, instead of addressing any of the charges, House Republicans stormed a closed door hearing to protest democrats impeachment inquiry process. Its like when youre on the debate team and the other side is really strong in the crossexamination, so for your counterpoint, you set fire to their coach. We have a picture of the storming. Thats either a bunch of republican lawmakers or a black friday sale on pleated khakis. laughter the g. O. P. Ringleader was Florida Republican and evil bobs big boy, matt gaetz. And, oh, gaetz came in hot. Im gathered here with dozens of my congressional colleagues, underground, in the basement of the capitol, because if behind those doors, they intend to overturn the results of an american president ial election, we want to know whats going on. Stephen oh, oh, i know donald trump pressured ukraine to give him dirt on joe biden, a whistleblower told congress, who are now Holding Hearings with republicans in the room, until they were all interrupted by the fraternal order of asshats. cheers and applause weve got a great show for you tonight. Ronan farrow is here. But when we return, right here, more monologue stick around dramatic orchestra performance comes in lots of flavors. Theres the ampedup, overtuned, feedingfrenzyof sheetmetalkind. And then theres performance that just leaves you feeling better as a result. Thats the kind lincolns about. Sc johnson. Magnum ice cream double caramel. Now in ice cream tubs and bars. [growling] mail slice. Just get one of me looking off. How is she there and were here . Condoms. True. Dont hatelike their trip, book yours with hotels. Com and get rewarded basically everywhere. Hotels. Com. Be there. Do that. Get rewarded. Is just like our originalhn sandwiches. Only littler. So we bought a little ad. On lil jon. Little johns, yeah 3, what . but one blows them all out of the water. Hydro boost with hyaluronic acid to plump skin cells so it bounces back. Neutrogena® and for body. Hydro boost body gel cream. Herebuy a bunch of reeses. Ck. uh huh, there you go so it bounces back. Turn off all the lights in your house. yeah yeah trick or treat and then just dont answer the door. Not sorry, reeses. Do you recall, not long ago we would walk on the sidewalk all around the wind blows we would only hold on to let go blow a kiss into the sun we need someone to lean on blow a kiss into the sun we needed somebody to lean on all we need is someone to lean on cheers and applause stephen welcome back, everybody. Jon batiste and stay human right there cheers and applause stephen jon you know im over here. More monologue. Theres too much monologue. We have to do two monologues tonight. Its one of those nights. And i cant wait to get beyond the monologue because our guest tonight is ronan farrow. A lot to talk about. Hes doing a tellall on you next, jon. Jon on me . Stephen yeah, hes blowing the lid off how nice you are. Jon thats great. Stephen dont sweat it. Today donald trump spoke at a shale energy conference, where under tremendous pressure, his mouth released some gas. First, he introduced his team. These are people that fight with me all the time on the witch hunts. Ive had the mueller witch hunt, the russia witch hunt. I have witch hunts every week. I say, whats the witch hunt this week . Stephen i think its whatever illegal thing you did last week. I think if we jump weeks like that, we leapfrog. Jon it would be a lot. Stephen then his brain hit an oil slick and started to spin out. Thank you, dan. Thank you. applause that looks like cary grant, doesnt he . Have you ever been told that . That is not a bad compliment, i must say. Today we have tomarn tom arnold, and in those days, you had it a little different. Those days, you had errol flynn cary grant. A little different. Stephen as trump back then, you had cary grant. Todays biggest movie star is tom arnold, in the hollywood blockbuster true lies, the biggest hit of 1994. Also the year my brain stopped absorbing new information. And trump found a new thing to brag about he builds the straightest roads. Instead of a straightine, looks like this, if you have a drink youre in big trouble. Stephen wait, so the problem with curvy roads its hard to drive drunk on. I promise you, in a second trump turn, the roads will be so straight, you can just jam an umbrella under the steering wheel, then lean back and get your cronk on, fol. Dont applaud. Please. Jon dont drink and drive. Stephen please, drink responsibly. As always, he harkened back to his days as a builder. I was a builder. Thats what i did the best i built. I really built good. Stephen and you still do youre building a really good case for impeachment. cheers and applause then trump made the workers a solemn promise. With the help of our proenergy agenda and by the way, youll never have another president like me. laughter stephen yes, yes, trump is unique, like a snowflake white, fragile and, with any luck, gone by spring. cheers and applause then applause laughter then he brought up building the wall obviously, its a big applause line, building the wall. Although, im not sure he knows exactly where. Were building a wall in colorado. Were building a beautiful wall, a big one that really works stephen what the huh colorado is not on the mexican border. Wait, wait. Is he trying to tell us something . as trump i had a great phone call with turkish president erdogan, gave him the goahead for his military offensive into new mexico. Hes just setting up a safe zone, folks. Got to clear all the kurds from albekurdy. Well be right back with mr. Ronan farrow. 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Folks, my first guest is an investigative journalist who won a Pulitzer Prize for his reporting on Harvey Weinstein. His new book, about the corruption and coverups he encountered during that investigation, is called catch and kill. Please welcome back to the late show ronan farrow applause nice tow see you again. Thanks for having me. Stephen let me ask you a quick question about the Pulitzer Prize. I love a question about about the Pulitzer Prize. Stephen i have a lot of prizes. I dont have one of those. Is it nice . It helps to fill the yawning void of insecurity im constantly trying to fill. Stephen i have one of those, two. The new book catch and kill, which digs into your reporting on Harvey Weinstein and the circumstances around it. Hoihow long ago did your originl article come out . Because we are before that, you know, hashtag me too existed and there was an awareness of sexual abuse happening in the workplace, Sexual Harassment happening in the workplace. It amplified, it certainly accelerated, broadened want peoples knowledge of this and created a new cultural era for us. What was when did that actually come out, that article . Its been almost exactly two years. Youre right, there was grassroots activism. But it has been incredibly moving to see an industry after industry people standing up and saying enough and starting to talk about some of the systems that kept this quiet for so long. Stephen lets talk about the systems. Thats whats fascinating to me. We know a lot about some of the revelations of powerful men not held to account. Lets talk about thes w waye protected. Whats catch and kill. Its an old term, isnt it . Its a tabloid journalism term. I use the