These troubled dogs before this happens im donald trump, and i am going to hump your leg. Announcer its a late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, masking for a friend. Plus stephen welcomes w. Kamau bell, and the chicks, featuring jon batiste and sta stay homin and now live on tape from a safe distance, its Stephen Colbert stephen did he do that . Did the dog eat your shoes . Yeah, you knew that. Stephen i thought it was a different pairt that he ate. Well, those look id chew those. laughter welcome to a late show. Im your host Stephen Colbert. If you havent checked the sports pages today, coronavirus is still winning. The United States reported a single highest single day of cases today just behind the record set the day before. I looked it up in the i need a guinness book of world records. In all these cases, governors and mayors are scrambling new mask orders. That seems a little late. Its like deciding not to send a mothers day card, then going, what the hell, happy fourth of july, mom. I wasnt wearing a mask when i signed this. Please wash your hands. One of the maskycomelatelies is alabama governor and lady at the bake sale who just lied about the brownies being gluten free, kay ivey. Ivey has been holding out on masks, but alabama just hit their singleday death record, so yesterday ivey issued a statewide mask order. To make the order more palatable to alabama voters, the masks will be deepfried. One elected official whos not giving in to the health huggers is georgia governor and face born for a mask, brian kemp. Yesterday, kemp explicitly banned localities from ordering people to wear masks. So not only is he doing nothing, hes stopping other people from doing anything. And to make matters worse, he Just Launched a new Georgia Public Health campaign, lick the elderly, its the law. To emphasize how antimask kemp really is, when donald trump landed in atlanta yesterday, kemp greeted him at the airport with a mask dangling from his ear. Look, either wear the damn thing or dont. Thats like surveying a Nuclear Accident with your hazmat suit tied around your shoulders. And theres more troubling pandemic news. Yesterday, we learned Russian Hackers have launched cyberattacks on covid19 research centers. So the russians are getting americas coronavirus data . Could they share it with us . And its not just any data, specifically, the Russian Hackers were attempting to steal Coronavirus Vaccine research. So if theyre successful, its only a matter of time before we start getting spam for a bootleg coronavirus cure. Very make health, super impress, lack of dying plus turgid member all night drive women go crazynuts wow wow wow buy now the attack was perpetrated by a group named a. P. T. 29, also known as cozy bear. Or their new alias, the dukes. I knew we couldnt trust those boys and their confederate car revving engine, banjo music looks likes them duke boys disruptin democracy with rootin tootin putin stephen this isnt the first time the dukes aka cozy bear have attacked the states because cozy bear was one of the groups accused of breaking into the d. N. C. Network and stealing emails ahead of the 2016 president ial election. So dont be surprised on Election Night when its announced the next president of the United States is senator corinne a. Virus. But for once, russia is the second biggest hacking story of the day because, yesterday, major twitter accounts were hacked in a bitcoin scam. If youre not familiar, a bitcoin scam is anything involving bitcoin. The hack targeted the accounts of people like barack obama, joe biden, mike bloomberg, elon musk, and kanye west with s with messages like im giving back to the community due to covid19. All bitcoin sent to my address below will be sent back doubled. If you send 1,000, i will send back 2,000. If obama and biden were promising free money, it would have been the biggest political scam since eisenhower roped canada into amway. To prevent it from spreading, twitter shut down accounts for hours. I was able to keep tweeting. The problem is, twitter didnt just disable celebrity accounts. As a result, when the National Weather service declared a tornado watch for parts of southern illinois, the agencys regional twitter account found itself unable to warn residents of the danger. Thats why i follow only unverified tornado accounts. ding . A little late with the sound. I already acted like i heard it. laughter wow, a house just fell on a witch. Her sisters going to be pissed. laughter got that reference. I did. Stephen yes, you did. We still dont know the identity of the hackers, but experts say that the fact that they attacked now, instead of waiting until closer to the election, suggests that they are criminals rather than government operatives. What . That makes no sense. You dont just hack an election without doing a test drive. Its like fast furious movies. You dont lead with fleeing a submarine across a siberian ice flow, thats crazy. You gotta start small with cars, work your way up to a tokyo drift, then you have the rock redirect a torpedo with his bare hands. Otherwise, it just seems farfetched. Twitter c. E. O. Jack dorsey took to, well, twitter, to express his discontent saying we all feel terrible this happened. Fun fact we all feel terrible this happened is twitters official motto. laughter , are you enjoying this . Thank you very much. The country is in crisis, but the white house is doing everything they can to stop the coronaviruss natural enemy, anthony fauci. Trumps cronies have attacked fauci in the press, dug up Opposition Research on him, and stopped meeting with him at the white house. But still, faucis more popular than ever. Case in point, he is the cover he wponent of the good doctors outfit is those shades. Holy c. S. I. Miami, batman. as david caruso will we have a treatment . That remains to be, vacseen. I dont know if this vaccines gonna work, but its worth, a shot. I havent spoken to the president in months. Hes avoiding me like, the plague. Doctor fauci appearing on the cover of instyle magazine is an historic moment for american medicine. Its almost as significant as that Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition featuring louis pasteur. Hey, remember the 2020 president ial election . Its still happening and according to a recent poll, biden now has a 15 point advantage over trump. Woohoo joe, youre doing great, by doing nothing stay in the basement. Someone toss a crate of ensure down the steps and yank the knob off the door. Right now, its less a case of biden beating trump and more a case of trump beating trump, because, according to another poll, 72 say the us is on the wrong track. Thats a devastating number, but who are the 28 who look around and say, yeah, this feels right america is perfect for me, an agoraphobic germaphobe with a fetish for face coverings. Now if youll excuse me, im gonna go collect my urine in a jar. Even though biden is leading now, the election is still almost four months away. A lot can happen in four months. You know where i was four months ago . With other people. I had an audience. I touched their hands. Probably not a great idea even then. I wont feel confident biden has won this thing until hes giving his first state of the union. And even then a part of me will be thinking, comey could still bleep this up. Of course, trump doesnt put too much stock in the polls. I think that the enthusiasm now is greater and maybe far greater than it was in 2016. I think a lot of people dont want to talk about it. I think theyre not going to say, hey, i am for trump. Im for trump. Stephen if youre doing such a great job, why are they embarrassed to say your name . When you propose to someone, you generally dont say, barbara, will you spend the rest of your life with me hiding in the attic so no one knows were married . In fact, trumps doing so well in the polls that, yesterday, he replaced his campaign manager. Yeah, you always replace someone when things are going great. This soups delicious. Arrest the chef. The guy trump pushed aside is former Trump Campaign manager and the official template for the nfl football, brad parscale. You may remember parscale for his tweet back in may, for nearly three years we have been building a juggernaut campaigndeath star. It is firing on all cylinders. Data, digital, tv, political, surrogates, coalitions, etc. In a few days we start pressing fire for the first time. I believe we have footage of the moment trump canned parscale i find my low poll numbers disturbing. Stephen obviously, thats not the real footage. Trump doesnt wear a mask. But according to insiders, parscale hasnt been completely choked out, hes just been demoted, because trump really cant fire brad he knows too much. as trump look guys. We cant fire brad completely. Hes the one who has that map that shows where all the states are. With covid case numbers skyrocketing in much of the country, back to School Season is looking more like back to laptop. In california, schools in los angeles, san diego and oakland will be doing full Distance Learning in the fall. With so many of our nations young people stuck at home, teen tv dramas are going to have adapt. Weve got a preview. Jim . This is an on creek day. This story is about staying home. But when High School Goes online, well, life doesnt just stop. Hey, braden, i didnt see you in social studies zoom. What gives . None of your business. I think it is my business because were together. I saw your zoom chats. You sent them to everyone. They were clearly meant for stashly. Wow, someones clingy. Social distance much . Stash orry, that wasnt me. Listen, casually, can we go somewhere and talk about this privately, like slack . Guys, come on. In these most difficult times, we sexy teams have to come together and i think youre frozen. Radisson. No, hes not frozen. Hes dead. He died. From murder. Now hes finally out of our way. Come here, babe. Where are you . Oh, here you. Go yeah. You guys this fall, were definitely still a thing. S shou tonig. W. Kamau bell and the chicks are here. But when we come back, a new service to help Peaceful Protesters get their out. Stick around. Up at 2 00am again . Tonight, try pure zzzs all night. Unlike other sleep aids, our extended release melatonin helps you sleep longer. And longer. Zzzquil pure zzzs all night. Fall asleep. Stay asleep. This little baby can detect trace amounts of cheetle. Whaaaaat . When did we get a cat . Its a cheetos thing. Off deep woods provides long lasting mosquito protection sc johnson well the names have all changed since you hung around but those dreams have remained and theyve turned around whod have thought theyd lead ya back here where we need ya welcome back, america. It sure is good to see you. Stephen wel lemr. Jon baste. Llo, jon. Jon wow. Stephen always good to talk to you. We were just listening to a song by a friend of our mr. Ben folds. Jon the great. Stephen called 2020. Its worth hearing. Jon yeah. Stephen its out there. Jon is he coming to play that one . Stephen i hope so. Jon we have to get him to come play it. Stephen i would be very grateful. Jon yeah. Its a great song and it speaks to a lot of what we are facing right now. Stephen yeah, yeah. So what sopping is on your mind right now . What have you been listening to last 24 hours, my friend . Jon oh, my goodness, i have been listening to lift every voice and sing and trying to figure out how to capture the essence of that song. That song, you can play it in any genre. humming jon yeah stephen jon batiste, everybody. Thank you, jon. Ill see you later. Its been less than two months since the start of massive protests against racism and Police Brutality, following the murder of george floyd, and the movement has not stopped. There are new protests happening every day. And the fact that, during a pandemic, so many people are willing to go out and advocate for change is inspiring to see. The only problem is were not seeing it as often as we used to. Apparently, the media isnt focusing on the protests as much as they did when there was more clashing with authority and destruction of property. But it turns out, theres a new product that might solve the problem of getting the media to cover peaceful protests. Ta a lk. Couny, thousands of protesters continues to take to the streets, but for some reason these cries for justice dont get the same air time as these siren well, not anymore. Introducing carafire. The brandnew video filter guaranteed to make your protest footage newsworthy simply by adding a burning car. Holding the palesful demonstration they dont show on tv . Car a fire. Registering people to vote . Car afire. Black transrights . Car a fire. Everything gets more attention when you add jarring violence, which is why car a fire is great for cspan hearings, even wedding videos. Car a fire really works. Need proof . It got me on tv right now car a fire, th the revolution will not be televised, unless you add a burning car. Stephen well be right back with the host of united shades of america, w. Kamau bell. New force flex plus, bright colors febreze freshness. 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Watch your bill shrink to 35 month after just 6 ontime payments. Plus get a free lg k51 when you switch on our new, upgraded network. Boost mobile. Stephen welcome back. Joining me is an Emmy Award Winning comedian who hosts the series united shades of america, please welcome back to the late show, w. Kamau bell. Thanks for being here. Hold for the applause. laughter hold for the applause, please. As performers, its always up here. Were always hearing the applause. Yes. Stephen nice to see you. Youre in california, correct . Yes. Stephen how is everything out there . How are you riding out the the coronavirus. Were all right. But now feels like were florida junior, i would say. Stephen thats surprising because california got a lot of praise for how they brought the hammer down firmly, fully. They were a model for everybody else. What happened . Orange county is what happened. Orange county is not San Francisco or lamb. I think we have a loft Orange County spread throughout the state. I think our governor felt pressure from them and other weird governors who are opening up. I like to think maybe this is a year or two before the apocalypse. When you see a movie about the apocalypse, you never see the year or two leading up to it. Thats what this feels like. Stephen things are almost normal. You never see mad max going, a year before, man, gas is expensive laughter you never see denzel washington, i cant find bibles anywhere so were maybe in a preapocalyptic moment which makes me feel better for some reason. Stephen im just going to knock wood for no particular reason. I know youre a father of three kids. Do you mind if i ask how old they are . Nine, five and a half and two. Stephen okay. O yay stephen so the two is a little young, but the five and a half and the nine certainly schoolage kids. I know all around the United States but especially in california, some School Districts are having kids come back, some arent. As a parent, how do you feel about that . I mean, everybody wants kids to be able to go get educated, but theres anxiety. Yeah. I mean, i dont believe our kids are going back to school. I think its just a domino effect. I think its just one School District at a time until they all go. Im sort of preparing for the fac thatd really going to have to bone up on how to educate our kids. At the same time, i know that the teachers at our school will be plugged in and trying to help them. Its just what we should have done in this interim is we can see how school works because its not going to work the way these worked for a long time, you know. Stephen now, youre a comedian, but youve got a cnn show. Do your kids watch the news . I mean, do they my kids watch a lot of news. My kids definitely i would put my nineyearold up against any other nineyearold about donald trump knowledge and whats going on currently in the white house. He would win that contest. Stephen does she ever set your back on your heels with some of her questions . I mean, shes like me. When i was a kid, i just sort of listened to what adults were saying and later would ask questions of my mom. I called my daughter an oldschool ear hustler. Shell come in in an hour and say, i have things i want to discuss, and well have a whole conversation about george floyd and Police Brutality while were on a tire swing. I was just spinning around in the tire swing, and she wanted a full explanation of what happened with george floyd and Police Brutality in america. And i was just like, aaahhh stephen wow. What does it feel like to have that conversation . I mean, weirdly, it feels great because i would rather have that conversation with her or have my wife have it with her than her to go through the world and not have had that se sersatand have sod publicly on cnn with your show united shades of america now going into its fifth season for years now. Its celebrated, emmywinning. How were you so prescient to know that the United States would eventually have racial problems . laughter i have books in my house that have the word history on them and i sort of read them. Stephen all right. I buy the books, and then i t