but 1st of all why have you ever received a telephone call or a letter for your partner who's passed away even worse is your deceased loved one ever been threatened with legal action Well that's the problem Neil Bowles had with the pension company listen to their policies and why you have to go through all this be able to quit so you're not sick a pragmatic approach to finding out all these companies you've got people like they the banks like pension benefits etc And similarly I know it's not found that most of them had the Raven sections and I thought with everything so nicely and gets a play that it might the whole thing so much easier. But then not to coalesce and inform them that it passed a by and I one of the things that might be the surprise because 1st of all it was a phone call center and there were certain. Difficulties this science of accidents and that sort of thing so it's very very hard to actually explain what was happening but I did seem to explain in the end and I said that we had about a month's money to square up and protect my pension yes I quit that that was our thing and then I said this the whole thing was then closed and there was no more need to contact them and then the mouse started coming through on Linda's accounts over the next few weeks Sinai were threatening to cycle to cope because she stopped by my pension and so I started to phone am and explaining things and I apologized as you'd expect and more a mouse started coming and so it was just fun call after you mouth phone call after a mallet threatening to cycle into court that eventually got through to someone who sings and I would I would say Ok about he said we should have spent 7 forms to fill in that give you the power to close down Linda's accounts now that the end of it should have been forms so they sent me the forms the thought that that's the end of it afterward in the forms little for They've got a letter back from them signed the forms for now because Linda hadn't signed them oh if I have insight so they they were threatening to take you dead wife to court yeah and saying they couldn't accept the forms because you dead wife hadn't signed them yet exactly and all the other companies involved they all say this quite simple normally that if need be paid off for a copy of the death certificate which are our title for a yes it's very easily done but I didn't I even offer them a death difficult my son and I we don't need it we can just put it on the system and that will take care of it now we will get annoyed that movie called centers and things will get very 1st try to repress someone pressin So listen to all these 4 seasons for me after our way over but this is suddenly become very personal one very emotional the on having to talk to strangers in a so-called government called friends. And trying to to swipe and my wife the state and it does you it really has done me in markets just sell up sets in. Since we contacted nest and told them we were going to be talking to Naomi all the sudden been interested in him and have got in touch with him so hopefully things they will be sorted out but have you had similar issues trying to prove that someone had passed away and he's on the line now morning Andy good morning Mark thanks for joining us what happened Andy Oh it was it wasn't it was when my dad died. Oh this is going back into the 9920 minutes on the poll tax and. When that go I. Went and told the. Bar Council because they sent through a poll tax. They said oh yes s.s.n. Shilling but just the same thing a poll tax moans and eventually they say a rate one with. A thing on it that said if you didn't if you can post poll tax taken to coordinate what sort of thing. I think is probably because that was probably still in the voters vote from the previous year so they can compete to anybody mother mother you know we're requiring placid lady but when she saw the red she saw right and she went charging into are 2 separate camps who stormed into the office lunch with Bill on the only. Counter in front the receptionist and said if you're in the party's blankety blank poll tax you can go up the blankety blank stare Sarah Jane cook deforming yourself is on not doing it will tell how did that work. She never heard a thing war. You understand sometimes mistakes happen but. It's. People One thing you need to take care of isn't it. Actually is I used to work in a bank and. Say we stood there with. What we are rather in incorrectly used to refer to as jobs but when people post while a little process we're dealing with and you know. Yet mistakes happen but it sounds as if the pension company needs to get their act together and get their systems or city and from what we've heard today just go to a Christmas decoration that means something to you. We've got a couple we've got this or. That you might have more in the real feathers which was my wife's mother gave it to us I think one of the 1st Christmases that gets put on the tree every year. Very precious and. That stain is 16 years ago my daughter to that I'm reminded with a mission organization important beautiful city set a homemade one. Night one and that has to come every year to remind us why we celebrate Christmas. Is that when you can bring them down like that and think oh wow that reminds me of such and such will sound so that's that's the wonderful thing about those decorations isn't it yes yes we are one song we used to also have a mousetrap on the Christmas tree ready your legs I'd like to annoy my wife was quite young. Her mom used to pull him out from the Christmas tree because it was there to catch you it catch the little mouse to catch the root chocolate. It was a term like it melts. Like it I like Andy thank you very much good to talk to you this morning we're going to do more on Christmas decorations off the 930 and spinning touch when her mom passed away. To the post office to close the pensions go through she said the death certificate said they couldn't close the account the name to. The form this was. Who would. sharing em some buses replacing trains on that stretch also train services between in Phoenix. Replacing train singing problems there and then also buses for place trying. To Sudbury because of signal problems and signal problems calls going on issues for trains between a and p. To Brown their running reduces the trains between Cambridge and because of the signal problems. Heavy around by Woodbridge a model if you're on. 12 ounce of cup talking to change ships a little bit busy going on to the roundabout there and queues going into very soon Edmonds rough and rugged safe odds seem to be doing fine around by a great part where the road works out I'm Gary Scott for b.b.c. Radio Suffolk travel if you see something or come up they'd be call 801412121. Just all radio this is b.b.c. Radio South eg. Been hearing about the case of who's been dealing with a pension company after his wife passed away and basically she employed him as a carer so he had to have a workplace pension with next pension scheme and he's been trying to say look you know my wife's passed away he sends paperwork off they sent it back saying she had to sign it why how can she spin passed away 5 months and they said we're going to take you take her to court as well which be incredibly difficult to do Rochelle's been in touch on the she's I'm so glad you took on this story I know my good friend Neil since last year and he deserves much better it is stunning also at how a company only decides to work with him after a radio show or the press get on to them just to cover their backs that seems cowardly and shameful to me Well I'm sure they were going to contact him anyway let's have a word with Cathy Hughes in Lowestoft Good morning Cathy Well good morning and thank you for joining us today it's really terrible when you lose a loved one and you do have to go through a lot of paperwork and to let people know and you had an experience not a nice one those who are yes I went to go into the building widely and take my host name of joint appearance and this nun stood at this day and they said Oh what can I do I don't I just said I would like that was all during a time and before I could get my real not that man said Well he got how many so. And do it and so over say I best in a day is. Still a woman. I was very upset. It's just insensitive isn't it that is that only that there is still many things like that and like the insurance I had to say isn't that a mole flat and that mean you couldn't carry on with that did him as he led to another new one. So the whole work is sore if it isn't it's a day away but at least you would imagine a company should have some kind of policy on hand to deal with these things yes that is. Kathy this is just one of those things I thought I'd just let you know na na bless you thank you very much for getting it's not so really appreciate it listening to that with me now Stephen Bruton partner in charge Ross coats solicitous in case Great Good morning Stephen good morning thank you for joining us on the program is this common place people are having difficulties trying to get official some to believe their loved one has passed away I think it was more commonplace in times past I think most institutions are actually getting quite sensitive to the issue and they have special bereavement departments. But I suppose in point I had and it was very distressing the chap died leaving insolvent a state to say his name was John Smith his widow kept getting bills from a bookshop in Cambridge addressed to John Smith and she kept ringing them up and saying look he's dead he's not going to pay we haven't got any money so it just went on eventually she got very distressed about it so they took it on board and then the next letter arrived to John Smith deceased in this just deceased really yeah oh yeah but I know I've actually done it myself I you know sent out a standard letter with a standard paragraph in it it said as you were buying in joint names and that the lady was very upset and it was just. Stupid I should have been more careful but that's what happens you know. Can we do anything that would help the process I was talking to Roland your own from reason suggested maybe you know we ought to think about Power of Attorney those kind of things is all the things that we can get in place with our loved ones are ahead of time of anything that might happen in the future would do that do those things help 1000 attorneys cease when somebody dies so it's a good thing for end of life time but it's Once somebody is dead then it's of no effect no value or no. Suspect listening to that lady she may not have said over the past person didn't hear her say when was that but again it is tutors so insensitivity and I think I learned my lesson are now very careful but it's a busy day and as you listen to the radio will hear things like this it's easy just to not be as sensitive as your own doing Ok nice Well at least this pension companies now are dealing with me enough to get in touch with them so I'm sure they're going to do that anyway most distressing thing for people is the delay of it and the time it takes for these companies to respond and sometimes it's a week sometimes it's months and months and months trying to get money out of pension companies like companies or sorts of institutions they take forever and that's very hard work for. People to keep their money still haven't come have to get on the phone or try to get a different person every time they ring on and on it. Stephen thank you very much appreciate you joining us this morning and if you've got somebody safe you've been down this road of trying to prove someone has passed away it's 080-141-2121 it's the last thing you need to do is not really when you've dealt with the loss of a loved one is to try and convince someone that. The noise here anymore. Would like. To move in. A. Month lose. The Mubarak. Yes and only 30 very and which I'm going to. Try to convince officialdom companies that someone has passed away. They always have systems in place to deal with this kind of stuff and cause most companies do but a mistakes happen but sometimes you just find yourself trying to convince someone that your loved one has passed away which is what Neil has had to take Let's talk to Linda who's on the line to us now from stock market Good morning Linda good morning did you have issues some point well I do not think she's convincing them I think they have issues compete for me he was still alive some way from Iraq well because they are kind of well known building society yeah there was a letter trying to change the draft what I do with you we try to get everything to my address a letter addressed to him and on a lecture it said Dear Mr My father's name and then 1st sentence sorry to hear about the death of Mr Assad and so Sidon the same day when he suggested also telling him the story about his death. So they were apologizing about his own death to himself Yes yes exactly did they not read what they were writing Well they they couldn't. Make a complaint about it they need to facially apologize but that wasn't the point it's lucky I wasn't that close to my stuff but it could upset the people quite a lot it's just insensitive isn't it Ray Yes The last thing you need thank you very much well there is a celebrant based in celebrant Good morning Tina Oh good morning how you are very well thanks for joining us this morning already quite disturbed by you know some of the stories that we've heard today of people having to really really work hard to convince companies business sees officialdom for want of a better description that a loved one has passed away. Just my so angry it does it it does make you very angry of listening to the stories on the radio this morning and they are very very distressing I mean my role of course I can see the family immediately after they have lost a loved ones that probably are no set the stage where they're receiving letters as we've heard from listeners this morning but when I can see families I particularly distressed about their stories of of what they're having to go through and experience and things like that having to clean flat so houses very quickly and get out within a particular time old or trying to get a getting through to sort of officialdom overseeing banks so solicitors So it's just a complete mind failed you know you've lost somebody which is ghastly in itself you know trying to come to terms with us and then you've got all these things that you have to do I think it's very hard yeah you can understand why people need documentation but it's when you say no and I still don't get it and don't understand what's happened absolutely yes I mean I think Stephen early I think he was very wise in what he said I mean he does say that a lot of companies nowadays and I understand that is correct they they do they are better trained in bereavement and understanding grace but it's it's it's very very difficult for families after they've lost someone is all they have to face and I cannot imagine what it must be like to be with even less of a loved one who's passed away and yet nobody can seem to sort of understand that I mean it was case we were going to take her to court and sending pipework bank because she hasn't signed it which is just think of the psyche not reading what you're getting up sending back that's right but I do think I'm not saying all families I think some families have much better experiences but I do think a lot of families can go through a lot of distressed after the passing of the 1st passing of their loved ones have never been through that before and then they're faced with all this documentation what do we need to be for us and of course that trying to. The funeral service as well and think about their own grief and their loss that it's terrible terrible for them and I tell you something else I think all companies should think about hope this is not quite what you're talking about you know but I think they should give people more time off whenever lost a loved one I think companies and businesses should allow more time off so that this documentation particularly can be sorted out. Because you've got the grieving process your work potentially and then you've got all of this documentation on top of the. Pile again I have to say they can't get the time off work and they have had to take a certain amount of time off but they just have to keep working and I think it coming it would just give them a little bit more grief and time leave that would be that would help enormously years a lot to so and if you're talking about. Someone's life time you know possessions and documents and house and all this can stuff it just takes time doesn't it where do you start. Thank you very much appreciate you getting in touch and joining us on the show thank you very much Jonesy Westberg Oh and he says In March 28th seen his wife died in the hospital after 5 weeks he didn't have any problems except from his insurance it was a joint account he got to the stage where he had so many days to pay in or they would be consequences in the end he agreed to pay it just to make them go away but when he offered to pay by card they said they didn't have the facilities to take a car payment in the end he managed to speak to someone at the bank you sorted it all out you can be the computer but you just need to speak to someone. Coming up next to Suffolk decorates it's Christmas trees have you got a special decoration that mean something to you. cut cut Band-Aid and Do They Know It's Christmas here on b.b.c. Radio suffocates Malkmus fi at breakfast and it's 21 minutes to 10 and James Hanks was on the way at 10 o'clock this morning good morning to you secret Santa we're looking at today. Yes Go on be a fun yes so waste of money on the set top guy could have been used but yes yes you are talking to the person who. Want does the secret send all of us a very good point yeah that's even allocated that this year have you of the soft policy it's not really a secret Santa it's kind of like a pass the parcel Yeah well there is actually don't that's different isn't it that's not really Santa that's not where you go oh I've got to spend a tenner on some I'd say I know the moment if you break this Christmas party so he's organized this actually I think it's 5 pounds per person Yeah the secret Santa you know and you have to make sure that you have an extra person in their case someone doesn't turn now I guess I got you but what do you buy someone with a fiver that me what do you eat on telly it's a secret where you go what that 5 and not be best spent on charity. Plaquemine it anyway Well look I wasn't able I didn't have one remember can you member that they were not cry Well you know questions were most Murphy Christmas lunch you know the team will go out and everybody's opening up their presence and arms in the. Yet. Right. Some surprise you found a venue big enough field team. So we'll look at that anyway from 10 o'clock yet it was in a phone box that I absolutely if that also can't be operating Barry been shortlisted in the top 10 for this year's design then sure the annual challenge we'll talk to a dream expert Emma about how dreaming can have an impact on your life and how to overcome the fear is that you have for every time a dream a dream about this place that the studios changed I don't know how to work it when I come back I often sit in tree I dream that I haven't got the next record we don't even play records but I often dream that the next record is never I always hunting for cds that reproach to play right yeah exactly There you go we'll be reminding ourselves of the work of the town past isn't Simon war has been watching telly He'll be reporting back mixtape back in the day all to come from 10 decks up yeah yeah yeah I was you know I was elsewhere over