things, was a long letter, a draft of a letter she had written to her husband in an effort to try to explain why she felt it necessary to leave him. >> "my spirit is crushed. i feel that you are too controlling and obsessive and jealous, and i just can't live with those personality traits anymore. i can't go on pretending that there is nothing wrong. i am unbearably unhappy. the bottom line is, i don't love you enough to stay married." >> also in her desk were books about divorce. >> she was planning the separation, and she had saved up some money, and she had spoke to a couple of lawyers to get some advice. and she was making her plans to move on to her new life with her children. >> and sherry told friends that bob had been abusive. >> no sign of physical violence at all. it was more that she wasn't comfortable around him. he was obsessive, controlling.