peace and find myself. >> had you ever had anybody to talk to about those things in your life before? >> no. >> tell me about what the last seven years have been like since you haven't seen her. >> trying to better myself, but keep finding the wrong women. i got into illegal escorts, ended up getting robbed, um, attacked by a pimp. >> have you tried to have a relationship outside of the paid world? >> i have, but for me, this is a safety. i get that girlfriend experience without the stress of a regular relationship. >> does it bother you that you have to pay for caressa? >> it doesn't bother me. i explained it to my mother as like, "i've got certain needs," as like, "i can go fulfill those needs legally, or you can come visit me in prison for the next 20 years." i'm not saying i would ever do something to someone, but it's, like, i do this to keep me from finding out because of my brain, the way it's wired.