Ive seen it. [laughter] and please follow me on twitter so we can live chat during the show. You can also watch full episodes of tosh. 0 on flo tv live mobile television. Finally, i showed you this video last week and asked you to guess what i was reacting to. Well, here are your guesses. Was it jane lynch winning an emmy . [laughter] no, it wasnt, but she deserved it. I am a huge gleetard. I dont know. But it was recio from the black guy clip of the week . Yes, recio, that was you. [laughter] [audience ohs] were you watching the jets and the slutty mexican reporter . No. I find that hard to believe. The jets cant score on anyone. [audience ohs] [cheers and applause] gonna be a long year, sanchez. [laughter] you were watching the diffrent strokes episode with dudley in the bike shop. Oh you mean the molesting episode. No, i wasnt, but solid reference. No. Was it the Interrogation Room suicide . No. [laughter] good job being wrong, everybody. It was a video of a gu all right, we are out of time. See you next week. Good night. [cheers and applause] captioning sponsored by Comedy Central [the colbert report theme music playing] [eagle caw] [cheers and applause] [cheers and applause] [crowd chanting stephen ] [cheers and applause] welcome to the report. Stephen good to have you with us. [cheers and applause] thank you so much, folks. Glad you are with me here tonight. Nation, al gore should be turning over in his grave, [laughter] because its march 6th and it is still winter. [laughter] a massive storm is sweeping the country, so i hope youre bundled up somewhere warm, surrounded by your loved ones. Particularly your slow moving, wellmarbled loved ones. [laughter] you never know. Now, this year the Weather Channel has taken to naming all the winter storms, theyre calling this one winter storm saturn. Personally, i would have gone with uranus because thats where they are pulling these names from. [laughter] besides, the rest of the media has a much better name for the storm. The dreaded s word, snowquester. Snowquester. Snowquester. Snowquester. Snowquester, right . Theyre calling it snowquester which i think is great. Isnt that cute . I think its cute. [laughter] stephen it is cute. And deadly. [laughter] of course, the snowquester is a combination of snow and the sequester. Nation, i think this fantastic and ridiculous. Or, fantasticulous. [laughter] we should name all of our weather events after what kind they are plus whatever people are talking about on television at the time. Today, a washington is blanketed in the snowquester, tomorrow, a storm covers new york in dronecicles. [laughter] or a freak blizzardashian. As we speak oklahoma is still suffering the effects of pope benedrought the 16th . [laughter] i mean, isnt that cute . [cheers and applause] kind of cute. Anyway, i think thats cute over to you stephen. Thanks, steve [laughter] nation, no one is a bigger fan of the Civil Rights Movement than yours truly. I even attended 1963s historic march on washington and this is true while still in my mothers womb. [laughter] ill never forget Martin Luther kings stirring words. [heartbeat sounds] [muffled voice] [laughter] thats why im personally invested in a challenge to the 1965 Voting Rights act now before the Supreme Court. Thats right. The law that banned the silencing of African Americans is finally coming before our nations foremost silent africanamerican. [laughter] of course, before the Voting Rights act black people were regularly kept from voting with roadblocks like literacy tests, poll taxes, and you must be this white to vote signs. [laughter] now that law is being challenged in the Supreme Court by Shelby County, alabama. They argue that the law is unfair, because it applies only to states with histories of Racial Discrimination alabama, arizona, georgia, louisiana, mississippi, South Carolina, texas, parts of carolina, texas, virginia, and alaska, which has a sad history of discriminating against its African American population brian. [laughter] good guy. [ laughter ] hes a good guy. [laughter] but theres one key reason to strike this act down, as shelby theres one reason to get rid of this law as Shelby County lawyer bert rein explained to the court. The problem to which the Voting Rights act was addressed is solved. Stephen you heard it, folks racism is solved jimmy, drop the fully integrated balloons [cheers and applause] we overcame it whoo [cheers and applause] look at that [cheers and applause] look at that look at that [cheers and applause] wow. [cheers and applause] wow, i must have missed the moment when racism ended. I wonder when it was . The time ross dated aisha tyler on friends . [laughter] or when keebler added a black elf . [laughter] oh, i know, it must have been when they made slavery illegal in mississippi all the way back in four weeks ago. [laughter] [ applause ] in fact, were living in such a postracial utopia that we couldnt suppress black votes even if we wanted to which we definitely dont. [laughter] luckily conservative stalwart and justicethehutt Antonin Scalia knows that the courts have to decide this, because even though racism is over, americas elected representatives lack the bicameral ball sack to vote against this thing. I am fairly confident it will be reenacted in perpetuity unless unless a court can say it does not comport with the constitution. Its its a concern that this is not the kind of a question you can leave to congress. Even the name of it is wonderful the Voting Rights act. Who is going to vote against that in the future . Stephen yes, youd have to be an ahole to vote against that in the future luckily, weve got an ahole who will vote against it in the present. [laughter] the point is, the Voting Rights [cheers and applause] the Voting Rights act is obsolete its like an old restraining order. These states are just saying, yes, i used to beat my girlfriend, but i havent since the restraining order. So we dont need it anymore [laughter] [cheers and applause] here to celebrate this milestone in equality live via satelite is one of the founders of the student nonviolent coordinating committee, chairman emeritus of the naacp and civil rights pioneer julian bond. [cheers and applause] thank you so much. Pleasure to be here. Stephen now that Racial Discrimination is over what do you plan on doing with your free time . Take pottery classes, hot yoga . I dont believe that Racial Discrimination is over. In fact, if anything its increased during the period when barack obama has been president. Stephen sorry, excuse me, sir, when the black president was president racism got worse . That doesnt really make any sense. Yes, did it. Stephen how is that possible he is black. Exactly so and his presence angered people who accused accuf him of being president while black. Stephen he is guilty of being president while black, you admit that . Yes, he is. Luckily the numbers of people who dont like it are small but the fact that they exist is upsetting. Stephen now that the Supreme Court its people in black robes its people in progress. Its step its not a step forward but you know, i am sure you are talking about the statements made by justice scalia. He is the Rush Limbaugh of the Supreme Court. Says inappropriate things over and over again most recently about the Voting Rights act. Stephen yes, its not a necessity a racial entitlement. Its not an entitlement to be able to vote without discrimination. Its something all americans expect to have. Stephen can we even remember who was denying Voting Rights to whom . Of course we can. Im old enough to remember. Stephen i cant. You lived in South Carolina. South carolina was a major offender and so a certain degree, much less so now, South Carolina is an offender now. Stephen i dont remember being discriminated in South Carolina. The point is that you were not discriminated in South Carolina. Stephen i accept your apoll by. Black people in s. C. Were discriminated against. Stephen what is wrong with a little voter intimidation . Doesnt it make the voter hungrier with the right to vote . Its like the right to vote is playing hard to get. Its exciting. Its a poll tease. Oddly enough the attempts by republicans to make it difficult for racial are notes to vote in the last election spurred more to the polls than were expected to good there. Stephen youve got georgia roots, Clarence Thomas has georgia roots. How come you see it so differently . Justice thomas and i have lived different lives and drawn different lessons from the lives weve lived. He thinks this way and i think that way and im right. Stephen you are right. Okay. Once its not happening anymore shouldnt you let the law go . For instance, we dont have slavery anymore. Shouldnt we get rid of the 13th amendment. Doesnt seem necessary. [ laughter ] im glad its there. Stephen okay. Because it would have affected me fit werent. Stephen thats assuming that people would want to enslave africanamericans again and its a little prejudicial. There would be people eager to do so. Luckily their numbers are not great and they dont seem to have much power. Stephen were not going to enslave africanamericans, sir, we have mexican nows. Indeed. Im glad the mexicans are glad to hear that. Stephen mr. Bond thank you for joining me. [cheers and applause] stephen welcome back, everybody. Thank you so much, folks. Ladies and gentlemen [cheers and applause] you know what they say . There is absolutely no such thing as a free lunch. So there might be, after i shamelessly plug delicious lunchables like the name says they are able to be lunch this is thought for food. Nation, nowhere is the nannystate more rampant than new york city, where mayor bloomjerk trademark has been curtailing food freedoms. First, he banned transfats, then he put calorie counts on menus, and now starting on march 12th, you wont be allowed to order a 2liter soda with your pizza delivery. Thats a lot less weight to carry for the delivery guy, who is the only person in this scenario getting any exercise. [laughter] bloomberg is acting like americans cant control what goes into their own mouths. Well, hes wrong we can control our mouths. Or at least snack food scientists can. [laughter] because last week the New York Times reported that the nachoindustrial complex has discovered something called the bliss point, an addictive combination of flavors that create the greatest amount of crave. [laughter] its the most ambitious project in food science since america put a man on a beanbag chair, and gave him a tube of cookie dough. [laughter] it was one small nap for man. No steps at all of any kind. [laughter] [cheers and applause] a recent breakthrough is that doritos has developed a complex formula that piques the taste buds enough to be alluring without a distinct, overriding single flavor that tells the brain to stop eating. Yes, doritos has engineered chips so that you keep shoveling them in your mouth without ever feeling satisfied. Which explains their new flavor blazin buffalo Bottomless Pit of unfulfilled longing. [laughter] [cheers and applause] now, this kind of flavorbased behavior modification may work on your casual snacker, but no Snack Company is gonna make me their bitch. [laughter] so screw the bliss point im going to prove to the world, and mayor bloomberg, that i can eat a single tostito scoop. [cheers and applause] jim, snack music please. You are the best you know what, im in such control here, i will choose to have one more scoop. [laughter] they are scoops. Ill have it with some dip. Hit it, jimmy. You are the best stephen welcome back, everybody. My guest tonight is an artist who does impressionis. For walmart shoppers. His painteddings cost 6. 99 for a pack of six. Please welcome brendan oconnell. [cheers and applause] mr. Oconnell thank you for coming on. Thank you for having me. Stephen you are an american painter traditionally trained. More or less. Stephen more or less. Lets say more. All right. [ laughter ] you capture themes of every day life and youve chosen to paint scenes from walmart. I started painting walmarts eight years ago. Stephen did they know . Well stephen let show the people what i mean. Jim, put up one of these. Its hard to explain. Okay. Stephen thats one of your paintings . What inspired you to paint a rack of jif . I just kind of liked the colors, patterns shapes. Ive been painting walmart for about eight years and watching people and going in and photographing and they kept asking me to leave. Jon were you going in there with an easeel . I was going with a came are and i would take pictures of the environment and then they said if you continue do that you are going to have to leave. Stephen so you are not allowed to take photos in walmart. Most retail environments dont allow to you take photos . Jon why . I dont know if they think they are losing trade secrets. Stephen yeah, you cant let out how these are stacked. [laughter] this reminds me immediately of course of like andy warhols soup can but it was a singular object. It was like objetdar and had a synthetic subjectiveness. This has an aggressive quality that turns pop art into consumer art. Now if does what i just said mean anything . Not necessarily but [laughter] stephen good because i was just [cheers and applause] i was just grabbing words out of the air there. What i think is interesting is we have a relationship to brands. I like the view of the world pushing the cart and out of the corner of your eyes five Miles Per Hour you see a blurred vision of the world. Stephen theres my Black Diamond smoked almond thats my brand. You get minimal information and people know exactly what you are representing. Stephen lets go to the next one here, james. All right, what is this . This is the check out aisle of the north bergen, new jersey, walmart. Stephen thats a good one. Thats a good one. [laughter] this is when they allowed me to have a feteo shoot there and his a cherry picker and professional photographer and we photographed this thing. What i like about this is you give minimal amount of information. This whole exercise was trying to put as little paint on the canvas. Stephen its an impressionist version of a parade. They were painting in paris and i feel like im painting the aisles of walmart. Stephen lets go to the next one here. Now is everyone who shops at walmart sexy . Because ill go there more often if this is what you get. Thats my wife. Stephen oh, it is. No. [ laughter ] i had various models over the years go in and i paid them to shop basically. So thats how the series began. I had the classic american blonde shopping in walmart. Stephen lets go to the next one. Okay. Is this called us. Great big us. Stephen i love this one. Is there anyway you could the only thing that would make it better is can i click on the painting and purchase these items . I sometimes snack while painting. Its you know, its very big. This one is like seven feet by eight feet. Stephen how much do these things go for . That is worth 40,000. Stephen 40,000 whasms is the low end . The small one goes for 1,000. Stephen okay. Could people who shop at walmart afford the paintings you make of them . [cheers and applause] what is interesting about the half the people who buy the paintings have never bought a piece of contemporary art before and the other half spend 100,000 every year. What i like is its a series that seems to have a Broad Spectrum of interest. Stephen you are about to get a lot more interest because you are getting the colbert bump tonight, all right . [cheers and applause] today you are painting walmart. This time next week you are painting at whole foods thank you so much for joining me. Brendan oconnell, painter of walmart. Well be right back. [cheers and applause] ,x