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'Chaos Walking': Wanna Hear What Tom Holland's Thinking? Think Again

'Chaos Walking': Wanna Hear What Tom Holland's Thinking? Think Again
'Chaos Walking': Wanna Hear What Tom Holland's Thinking? Think Again
An attempt to start a film franchise out of Patrick Ness's YA sci-fi books - about a planet where everyone hears your thoughts - falls flat on its face its first time out
David Fear, provided by
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Chaos Walking, an adaptation of Patrick Ness’s young-adult trilogy about a planet where one’s private hopes and fears become public audiovisual transmissions, cribs the sentiment from that Dylan couplet — though, to be fair, it does not chop off a single person’s head. Characters are shot, beaten, tortured, drowned, chased, burned, pushed into an abyss, scratched, and shamed, but no gets the falling blade. What happens to the cast of Doug Liman’s movie version, however, is far worse than any of that. They end up finding themselves stuck in an overcooked 22-pound cinematic turkey, a genuine schlockbuster, a cosmic flop. The guillotine would have been quick and merciful. An association with this misfire will be on their résumés and their IMDb pages and, likely, their consciences for a long, long, long time. (It hits theaters today. Pray it goes away soon.)

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Chaos Walking review: A great sci-fi premise elevates uneven YA

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In the distant future of
Chaos Walking, Doug Liman’s long-delayed, would-be science fiction blockbuster, human settlers live like cowboys on another planet. New World, as they’ve christened it, is pretty similar to Earth, save for some unfamiliar fauna, a sun that never sets, and one unusual metaphysical anomaly: Every man or boy that sets foot on the surface of this foreign terra firma finds their most private thoughts publicly amplified. The phenomenon, which they call The Noise, manifests as a holographic halo swirling around everyone’s head—their stream of consciousness vaporized into projected images, their inner monologue made involuntarily outer. Some have learned to control and even mute the running commentary airing from their smoking noggin. Others find themselves over-sharing every hour of every day.

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What to Watch in March: 'Godzilla vs. Kong,' New MCU Series and Prince Akeem Returns to America

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What to Watch in March: 'Godzilla vs. Kong,' New MCU Series and Prince Akeem Returns to America
What to Watch in March: 'Godzilla vs. Kong,' New MCU Series and Prince Akeem Returns to America
From blockbuster superhero releases, to a sequel 33 years in the making, here are the best movies and TV shows to stream this March
Keith Phipps, provided by
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The first two months of 2021 have brought no shortage of compelling, even great, movies and TV series but in March we’re getting some full-on events. A big, new animated Disney movie! Eddie Murphy returns to one of his most famous roles! Godzilla fights King Kong! Zack Snyder fights the limitations of a theatrical running time! It’s madness in the month of March! (If only there was some kind of pithy phrase that could be used to describe such a thing).

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