Page 88 - Funny News Today

the beautiful wife >> something crazy about her. >> but an ill wind will blow through paradise. >> kennel dogs were very upset. >> it was huge ruckus. >> i knew my heart something terrible had happened. >> we heard the dog trainer gone? a trail of sinister clues. >> there was three wet blood spots in the hallway. >> there is also its of ammunition and guns and firearms on magnets behind tapestries. firearms injuries over his house. >> he has his arms around a big role of plastic in my ...

we are grate. . "the beat" with ari melber starts right now. >> see you tuesday. >> im ari melber, we begin with the breaking news. we start the new week with the federal defendant, donald trump, back in florida. this is the eve of his federal arraignment tomorrow, and he made the trip from new jersey preparing to voluntarily surrender into federal custody for the first time as a defendant. that is the consequence of the indictment unsealed and briefly explained by jack smith on friday...

tons of smoke all landing here making it the worst thing from that country since seth rogen. but as the trees burn, another tree speaks out. john parry commemorated the 79th anniversary of d-day by comparing it to the fight against climate change. >> note to john. its okay to visit the statues at easter island. just dont turn into one. he claims the climate change bite requires the same level of innovation and mobilization required to fight the nazis. but todays threat comes from all o...

my name is andreas vollsund. im mayor of time kommune. bryne is the big city in this community. bryne is a small place, but a warm place, a place where everyone knows each other. the people in bryne, in time kommune, in the jaeren, as we call it here, is, yeah, friendly people, but working, hard—working people. bryne is the biggest place in an area called jaeren, which is a very agriculture—heavy place, theres a lot of farms. right outside of the city, you can see green grass every...

when i was young, i wanted to become the best in the world. dreams do come true. my name is andreas vollsund. im mayor of time kommune. bryne is the big city in this community. bryne is a small place, but a warm place, a place where everyone knows each other. the people in bryne, in time kommune, in the jaeren, as we call it here, is, yeah, friendly people, but working, hard—working people. bryne is the biggest place in an area called jaeren, which is a very agriculture—heavy place...

hello, america. im jimmy fallon, the king locke of late night. >> greg gutfeld is out. and thats a good thing becaus,e would totally trash this jacket from my overweight figure skater collection like, listen, folks, greg bashes my wardrobe a lot. but in my defense, unlike greg, i cant borrow clothes from peter dinklage. jimmy. >> anyway, we have a great show for you tonight with a. but before we get to them, it is friday. now, the normal tradition on gutfeld is that wed open with lefto...

second, martha but you are live at perry, iowa news officials holding a news conference giving details on the school shooting earlier today. >> an opportunity a few moments ago to speak to the officers involved. in a situation like this as we all know, every minute counts. and they are heroic actions, we can say save lives. the response was tremendous. and we are extremely grateful. the full resources of the state government will be available to assist in the response, and of course, t...

as donald trump makes a third bid for the white house and is the the first votes are to be cast in iowa in just under two weeks. trumps lawyers say the 234-year unbroken tradition of not prosecuting the presidents for official acts, despite calls to do so from across the political spectrum, provides powerl evidence. no president prior toth donald trump tried to disrupt the peaceful transfer of power. had his attorneys point to the likelihood of mushrooming prosecutions. and future cycl...

♪ m along with rachel, jessica, and jimmy. its 5:00 in new york city. this is "the five." >> well, democrats creating more election chaos as they try to stop americans from voting for donald trump. maine disqualifying the g.o.p. frontrunner from its 2024 ballot. and its all thanks to the states democrat secretary of state. she decided to follow colorados lead and find trump to be ineligible under the 14th amendments insurrection clause over his actions surrounding january 6th. she ma...

tonight. a foreign policy stumble. the biden administration sending two senior officials to china yesterday the exact day the tin men square anniversary. we dont know to this day how many people were killed. recognizing that atrocity still forbidden in china. tom cotton says this official visit sends exactly the wrong message. >> biden administration officials should stop chasing after the chinese communist counterparts like love struck teenagers. it is embarrassing and pathetic. it pr...