Page 6 - Stand Ups News Today

You want to see? >> yeah. >> no. >> whoopi goldberg always thought of herself as an actress more so than a comedian. she was very much in the spirit of lily tomlin, more so than the stand-ups of era. >> they said, are you a valley girl? no, im a surfer, because before there was the mall, there was the ocean, okay? >> she was so much more than stand-up, she was commenting on the world were living in a really interesting way through these different characters. >> i passed this big dude walking aro...

Beach? did you notice any reaction? were people headed to the hotel? >> let me show you something. take a look. so out in the distance, quite frankly, this is the last day of a long reporting trip, well shoot some stand ups, in the water where those people were surfing right out there. not a siren to be heard. not a word spoken in the water and once we got back to shore. about to have breakfast and meet our colleague sky from nbc left field. and she basically ran up to us with terrified look on ...

Your mouth, which i think is appropriate and funny. >> listen, i dont have time to tell you all the things that are the matter with you. but lets start with that checkered bell bottomed suit. >> you had to learn to deal with it if you wanted to make it in the clubs. and the best ones did. >> hi, pigs. >> i dont know how to say this, but i want to be on you. >> i dated my last boyfriend for two years. finally, i gave him an ultimatum. i said, listen, either you tell me your name or its over. >> t...

Your mouth, which i think is appropriate and funny. >> listen, i dont have time to tell you all the things that are the matter with you. but lets start with that checkered bell bottomed suit. >> you had to learn to deal with it if you wanted to make it in the clubs. and the best ones did. >> hi, pigs. >> i dont know how to say this, but i want to be on you. >> i dated my last boyfriend for two years. finally, i gave him an ultimatum. i said, listen, either you tell me your name or its over. >> t...

>> save yourself. >> that must have been a fun scene for you to be in, eating all that cake. >> yeah. a few takes. >> im sure there were a few takes. the cast have already suffered many heartbreaks, too many of them, including your tv mom ask kbrour d your dad, and your mom, dana boyle. >> i remember when i got the pilot and i met ray for the first time. we were both stand-ups for years but we had never met on the road and didnt know each other. when we knew doris roberts and peter boyle were go...

24 american people without getting the congressional budget office to score. you can look at every one of those republican leaders that were in donald trumps background shot, serving as his standup that basically his stand ups for a prop. and every single one of those men -- i just say men because -- >> theres a woman there, but she has her head down, smartly. she actually has a brain. she knows this is bad. >> ducking her head. every one of those men standing by, if youre a conservative, you ne...

>> paul: absolutely. its your first time getting paid as a performer, and its also the largest amount of people ive performed for was on a cruise ship. its 950 people youre performing to, you know, four nights a week. >> anthony: right. >> bearded man: places, act 1. >> woman: how are things? >> guy: ah, good. should i put the game on? the patriots are playing the red skins. >> paul: do we know where the dry cleaning is? theres no job that you can liken to this job. >> woman: what are you trying...

And knock the [ bleep ] out of your mouth, which i think is appropriate and funny. >> listen, i dont have time to tell you all the things that are the matter with you. but lets start with that checkered bell bottomed suit. >> you had to learn to deal with it if you wanted to make it in the clubs. and the best ones did. >> hi, pigs. >> i dont know how to say this, but i want to be on you. >> i dated my last boyfriend for two years. finally, i gave him an ultimatum. i said, listen, either you tell...

But lets start with that checkered bell bottomed suit. >> you had to learn to deal with it if you wanted to make it in the clubs. and the best ones did. >> hi, pigs. >> i dont know how to say this, but i want to be on you. >> i dated my last boyfriend for two years. finally, i gave him an ultimatum. i said, listen, either you tell me your name or its over. >> this is my long, luxurious blond hair. aint it pretty? >> yes. >> i could put it in a ponytail, you want tsee? >> yeah. >> no. >> whoopi g...

Checkered bell bottomed suit. >> you had to learn to deal with it if you wanted to make it in the clubs. and the best ones did. >> hi, pigs. >> i dont know how to say this, but i want to be on you. >> i dated my last boyfriend for two years. finally, i gave him an ultimatum. i said, listen, either you tell me your name or its over. >> this is my long, luxurious blond hair. aint it pretty? >> yes. >> i could put it in a ponytail, you want to see? >> yeah. >> no. >> whoopi goldberg always thought ...