Transcripts For COM The Daily Show With Trevor Noah 20240712

COM The Daily Show With Trevor Noah July 12, 2024

Trevor lets begin with the police. If youre black, you know them as the guys pulling you over. If youre white, you know them as the guys that give lap dances at bachelorette parties. For three weeks since the killing of george floyd, millions of people around the country have been calling for police to be reined in. And after weeks of local leaders responding to the protests, today, the president carefull carefully shuffled down the ramp into the fray. Called for some modest changes, like a database to track police misconduct. There was a new thing that would challenger Police Departments not to use choke holds, saying the choke holds should not be used unless an officer felt like his life was in danger, which means the thing can be used, but it cant be used. But it can be used. When trump came out to make these remarks, it just felt like his heart wasnt in it. Americans believe we must summit the brave men and women in blue who police our streets and keep them safe. Americans know the truth. Without police there is chaos. Without law there is anarchy, and without safety there is catastrophe. Americans want law and order. They demand law and order. They may not say it. They may not be talking about it but thats what they want. Some of them may not know thats what they want but thats what they want. We will have law with our extremely talented Law Enforcement officers. President obama, and Vice President biden never even tried to fix this during their eightyear period. Trevor donald trump is always constantly downplaying the number of bad cops. If bad cops was a minor problem you wouldnt have huge protests in every city. You would just be able to point to the bad cop and say, gary, cut that shit out. Trumped signed an exclusive order that was supposed to cut down on trump violence but spent the whole time praising the police. Trumps executive order clearly doesnt have much teeth, but some places are taking steps that really could make a difference. New york has just disbanded a 600member undercover unit for a long history of abuse. And San Francisco and albuquerque are now saying soon when some residents call 911, they wont get the police at all. Instead, calls for situations involving drug overdose, the homeless and people in mental distress will be answered by an often armed professional who is trained in those fields. And i think i mean we can all agree this is long overdo in america. Police in america do too much. So if you can avoid bringing armed police to these situations in the first place, that should be the goal. Because wherever a gun is present, it means theres a chance the gun is going to go off. If theres a gun in a club and a fight breaks out, theres a chance a gun will go off in the club. If kids are playing and a gun is around, theres a chance the gun will go off. If theres a couple fighting and theres a gun around, theres a chance that gun is going to go off. Having a gun gives every tense situation the potential to end in death. Think of the last time you played monopoly. Now imagine having a gun there. Its gonig to end like a tarantino movie. And i know this seems like a radicality idea to some people. Some of you are like, what, do you mean youre not going to send the cops. Think about it, its the same thing we did with ghostbusters. Yeah, they used to send cops when ghosts showed up, and then they realized, these are not the right people for this kind of job. So they created the ghostbusters, and they didnt have guns. They had ghost vacuum cleaners, and it worked way better, and it was also funnier. In fact, maybe more people would get on board if we just made up a cool name for the social workers we send out. Who you gonna call . Systemicsocietalissue busters as the protests can gone on, the focus has expanded from Police Abuses to other forms of systemic racism. A lot of attention has been given to confederate monuments. But in new mexico, the big debate is another statue of a brutal man from history. Lets get to new mexico, where a man was shot last night over a protest over a statue of a spanish conquistador. Demonstrators were trying to tear down the statue, while also clashing with members of a selfappointed Armed Civilian militia who vowed to protect the statue. The victim is in critical but stable condition right now. Several people believed to be militia members involved in the shoot regular now in custody while police investigate. The city says the statue will now be taken down for Public Safety reasons. Trevor first of all, the fact the news can say the phrase, selfappointed Armed Civilian militia, like its normal, tells you that something is very wrong in america. In africa we call them rebel forces. Look at those selfappointed militia who have gathered together to overthrow somebodyap ah, yes, yes. Much like the debate over confederate statues, this debate is about why in america anyone would have a statue honoring a 16th century spanish conquistador, who, by the way, enslaved and massacred hundreds of indigenous people. This shows the problem with statues in general. We dont need statues anymore, people. It doesnt matter who theyre for. We dont need statues. Statues are like tweets. The type you make them they seem cool but if you leave them up for to go at some point theyll become problematic. If you ask me, statutes shouldnt be built to last forever. They should be designed to naturally dissolve after a few years, like a hollywood marriage. And then once it crumbles, you can decide as a society whether its worth rebuilding, like a hollywood face. Now you are changing the whole dynamic of the debate. Think about it its a lot easier for people to fight and say, lets leave up the statue. Its part of our history. Its a lot harder to issue, okay, guys, we need to raise money for a new bill cosby standpointue. By the way, why does a 16th century spanish conquistador have such a devoted angry fan club to begin with. Who are you people . Why is this your hero . Why caercht you be obsessed with beyonce like normal people. Conquistador, theyre not even here. They dont have number one hits. No one is singing conquistador songs. All the conquistadors, all the conquistadors. That wasnt a hit. Maybe the biggest sign of the power of the black lives movement right now is it is changing americas cultural institutions. Just look at the n. F. L. , which is surprising everyone with a highprofile reversal. N. F. L. Commissioner Roger Goodell weighing in on quarterback Colin Kaepernick, who has not played since 2016, when he first started kneeling during the National Anthem to protest racial inequality. Well, goodell now saying he encourages a team to sign kaepernick. I welcome that out a club making that decision and i encourage them to do that. Goodell again says he and the league were wrong to oppose the kneeling protests started by kaepernick. We should have listened to our players earlier. Our players including Colin Kaepernick. Trevor goddamn. All of a sudden, Roger Goodell wants Colin Kaepernick back in the league. No one from the n. F. L. Has been jerked around this much since robert kraft went to that massage parlor. This move by the n. F. L. Is a lot like when your parents finally admit you were right but its like a decade after they punished you. Thank you for giving me my discman back. Now ill go find some cds. And i know some are saying its just putting a bandaid on the problem, to when bandaid replied, no, this is putting a bandaid on the problem. Bandaid is looking to be more inclusive. The brand is launching a new line of bandages in different skin tones, from beige to dark brown. The company, which is owned by johnson johnson, says the move is meant to embrace the beauty of diverse skin. No words on when these new bandages will be available in stores. Trevor thats right, after 100 years of existence, bandaids are finally discovering that some people are not white. Sadly, its too little too late for nanny. Dont get me long. I think its long overdue for racial minorities to have products that recognize our existence. Its just a little weird that elmo got bandaids before black people. I just hope they stop at a few shades, because if you give people too many options, its going to become a problem. Youll be bleeding out in the store like, no, not that one. No, not that one. I spent a bit of time in the sun. Thats nice, thats nice. Oh, and while youre at the drug store to buy the new black bandaids, you can also pick up some black Beauty Products with a lot less hassle than before. Walmart says they will no longer put black hair Care Products in their locked cases. Walmart told nbc news the company is sensitive to the issues and understand the concerns and the changes will be implemented as soon as as possible. Trevor for years, walmart and other drug stores have been locking up black hair and Beauty Products, and not the white products. Even black Hair Products suffer from mass incarceration. What is this shit, huh . This is great news. What portsmouth of walmart is saying i hrpd you were talking about walmart trevor i was dulce, but how did you . Never mind that. I got some thoughts. Trevor i want to know how you hacked into anyway, i imagine youre pretty happy that walmart is getting rid of this policy, right . Yes. Free at last, free at last. Thank god almighty, the black hair care is free at last not only did this racist ass policy treat black people like thieves, but you know what the worst part . It made every trip to walmart ten times longer trevor why would it be longer . Because i had to go on a magical quest to find the person with the key who then had to unlock the cage who could finally retrieve my treasure. Its like a black lord of the rings. Trevor its like an extra 10 minutes. Why does it matter . Do you know how long it takes to style natural hair . Do you know how much i have to go through the magical process, the moon, the stars and the products that have to come together for this to grace the plan snet thats time consuming. Its wash day. Its a whole day its prepooing, shampooing, deep conditioning, and then i gotta bail my hair care out of jail. No. Trevor wait, bail your hair care you mean buying the products. No, its bail. I have to sign a piece of paper. I have to put my house up. Its a whole thing. Trevor i dont know where youre buying your hair Care Products but i understand what youre saying, dulce. I think its great news the policy is ending. And i bet you will be going to walmart soon. I have already been, and just so you knowuc i sent you a Little Something in the mail, i see you need some help. You have no hair and makeup and you have a quarantine baby fro. Youre looking kind of dry. Trevor wait, wait, what do you mean its i used i used bye trevor no, dulce, wait. Dry . I prepoo. When we come back, Michael Kosta, jaboukie youngwhite are going to be discussing the best ways to fight for equality. So stick around. Find new listings so quickly . operator got another vacancy at fifth and pine. brad oh, thats good. Apartmentsdotcom. The most popular place to find a place. Good mormore treatment . Were going to try Something Different today. Hi awwww, so pretty. Dogs bring out the good in us. PedigreeĀ® brings out the good in them. Sixtytwo thousand seven hundred and ten dollars and thirtyone cents. Sofi allowed me to refinance all of my loans to one low Interest Rate and an affordable monthly payment. And i just feel like theres an end in sight now and that my debt doesnt define me anymore. Sofi is helping me get my money right. Could put cookies creme in twix. Twix sofi is helping me get my money right. This is a right twix. Excuse me. [screams into pillow] new twix cookies creme. I never dwell in the moment im just constantly focused on the next thing. When i reach a goal, i cross it off and set a new one. Over the past few weeks, millions of people have been trying to get involved in Racial Justice issues for the first time. Theyre marching, theyre protesting, and theyre donating money. In fact, some groups supporting the protests have gotten so much money, theyre asking people to stop donating to them and donate somewhere else, which is way more altruistic than i would be if my charity was overrun with donations. Im not going to lie. Id be like, we liberated all the protesters from jail. Now lets liberate that maserati from the dealership. So with so many newcomers to the black lives Matter Movement, a lot of people are having conversations about what they can do to further the cause, and what doesnt help the cause. To move that forward, our very own jaboukie youngwhite and Michael Kosta had one of those very needed conversations. Michael, so many people are joining the black lives Matter Movement, including white people, which i think is ironic, considering how quickly white people get on to black trends. Like, why didnt this happen earlier . Yeees go off, jaboukie. Whats important, though, is that were finally all on the same page. Were fighting to End Police Brutality and end systemic racism. Yes, yeah, no, yeah, and now that were all on the same page we can focus on making sure everybody is taking action, you know, effective action, not just black squares on instagram. I could be the agree more, jaboukie. Posting a black square on instagram means nothing. Thats why i tato do a black square on to my body. Thats commitment. Why does that look like youre covering up a worst tattoo. Its actually a third nipple that im covering. Look, ill be tattooing a black square on my body until we dismantle racism in this country or i run out of skin. Whichever comes first. Youre probably going to run out of skin first, and then youll be in permanent black face. Black face . Shit. Why does everything i do end up in black face. Forget the black square. Whats important is to remind people theres still a lot you can do to help. Right, like protesting, donating, volunteering for campaigns. Watching the help every day, text messaging yu black friend, we go . Which, by the way, jaboukie, we good . No, no, not if thats all youre doing. Its not. Im doing more. I made a celebritystyle video to showeb how committed i am. Take a look at this. Black lives matter. Black lives matter. Black lives matter. Your spirit is in the right place. But you know that theres a difference between symbols and nice gestures and stuff like that, and then actual change and action. You know that that, right . I know about change. Yeah . Im all about change. Remember this guy . Yeah. Hey, hey, walter its not walter. I changed his name. His new name is racism is bad. Isnt that right . I love you so much, racism is bad. Oh, my god. See, okay, this is exactly what im talking about. Like what is it going to take for white people to just genuinely want action or change or or wait. Hey yeah kosta. Did you know that cops kill hundreds of dogs every year . What. Yes. And you know what . Most of them unarmed. Well, weve got to defund the police then. All right, yeah. Thats not even enough. Weve get to abolish the police. 100 . bleep we have to dismantle the entire military industrial complex. Okay wait, wait, i just donated all my money to the n. A. A. C. P. Why are we still sitting here . I dont know. We need to get out on the streets. Racism is bad. We need to go to washington. Lets go, lets go, lets go. All right, okay. I knew it would work. Trevor smart thinking, jaboukie. When we come back, well be talking with republican senator tim scott. So stick around. Tomorrow can only be better with wendys breakfast. Win with a breakfast baconator, honey butter chicken biscuit, sausage egg and swiss croissant or frostyccino. And get another for a dollar. You and wendys breakfast. Tomorrow is lookin good in the time it takes to brew a cup at home, heres the story of Green Mountain coffee roasters. Meet mario. Mario helps make nantucket blend taste phenomenal. So we support him. To recycle nutrient rich water. To help make his soil rich. And his coffee stunningly delicious. All for a smoother tasting cup at home. Green mountain coffee roasters. To save on auto insurance. Theres lots of ways really . Yeah. Very proud of that. With smartrideĀ® from nationwide, they can get discounts for safe driving. Does she get one . Mrs. Carmichael . Safest driver in peytonville. Takes a lot of work and effort to be the safest driver in peytonville. What about this guy . With nationwide smartmilesĀ®, the less he drives, the less he pays. The list of Inspiring Stories goes on and on. I bet. Ive never seen anyone do more with their retirement. Than you. I. Concur. [son] mom yeah. [son] i fell. Okay theres bandages in the cabinet. [son] im bleeding. Grab two. Sheba. What cats want. Trevor welcome back to the daily social distancing show. My first guest tonight is the republican senator from south carolina, tim scott. Earlier today, we spoke about leading his partys effort on Police Reform in the senate and about working with President Trump. Check it out. Senator tim scott, welcome to the daily social distance show. Youre welcome. Thank you for having me. Trevor thank you so much for being here, especially on today. We saw the president of the United States come out and release what many people were surprised to see from him, you know, a sweeping reform in his opinion on police force. Some people thought, like, it didnt go too far. For President Trump, some people were shocked he even did anything at all. Upper in the room. You have been part of those discussions. What did you make of the executive order . I thought it was a good day. I thought it was a strong day for the country. I was glad the president took up the issue so many of us have talked about most of the of our lives. If i started this journey five years ago working on the walter scott notification act, and to be here now with the president signing an executive order which disease with some of the more important issues like the choke hold, to the importance of the coresponders, those folk

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