contemplated suicide and poured out his feelings to strangers on the internet has so many people do. he pictured himself at one point with a rifle and suggested he might have to go to jihad. when he did that a response from a woman he never heard of and the two never met in person but over time a very intense relationship develop.fe and she professed her love and recorded it online forr weeks but then got to stop writing and disappeared to. then a new woman took her place in this one began texting also. her name was jana. she told him that if he planned to kill himself, he might as well take some with them. when jihad on create or cause that is the only time all that allows it. that is what she wrote, but eventually admitted that fantasized about killing people in a church near his pizza shop though he stressed he would never actually do it.