i checked and at 9:45 p.m., he was texting for the girl he was going to have a date with. so he was excited. nine minutes later, he texted me and said, i feel like it's all spiraling out of control and i'm going to take my life. in nine minutes, he went from -- >> it was like a switch. >> he went. so i was in a texting conversation with him then for the next hour trying to talk him, you know, off that ledge, talk him into independent. so i knew it was very desperate and i also knew he had a gun. so i knew that there was, that he had the lethal. >> the means moi. >> so not only was he impulsively in despair, i knew he could do something about it. >> how did you know he had the gun? >> he told us. he told us everything. >> i will come to that. he bought the gun online. >> he did. >> illegally. >> he did. >> we'll come to that. but you knew that. you had a suicidal son with a gun. >> he was getting more and more