anger, frustration. >> add to that the note from carmella found in heather's car. >> i remember telling her, you're dead to me in the note. >> you're dead to me? >> hard words that carried weight like knives. i didn't know the weighing of them. i took her for granted. >> do you regret writing that in. >> oh, yeah, in more ways than one. >> reporter: carmella says there was never a serious argument about heather's hair. >> i would have never said anything to make her feel bad or think that her hair wasn't looking good. it was just the color preference. i said i liked it better blond. but it still looks nice, that's little e literally all that was said. >> there was never a fight about her hair? >> no, there was no fight about her hair. if something was off, you can communicate about it. i can't tell you how many times we agreed to disagree. >> reporter: carmella said the investigation ultimately built a