Page 4 - King Jon News Today : Breaking News, Live Updates & Top Stories | Vimarsana

Well, kid . Well, if you put it that way. Come in, unit four what have you found . Nothing, sir. We just found some tremendous deals on cars nobody wants, thats all. Barkley, out. No but obama wasnt really elected. Dont you people care . [choral singing] obama is president again captioning sponsored by Comedy Central from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. cheers and applause jon welcome to the daily show. My name is jon stewart. The guest tonight, listen to this, settle down. Supreme court justice, thats right, today on the show, Supr...

Theres not that many chances in your life where you get to see a problem and then eat that problem. I wouldnt have even fixed my car. Id wait for people to be like, what did you hit . So i could be like, this. [ laughter and applause ] all right, thank you guys very much. Youve been great. I really appreciate it. [ cheers and applause ] captions by vitac www. Vitac. Com captioning sponsored by Comedy Central from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. cheers and applause jon welcome to the daily show. My name is jon stewart. The guest toni...

Cop i have ever seen. Are you volunteering. Community service. Is that how you get your audience . Are you montley landscaping [daily show theme song playing] [cheers and applause] jon hey, everybody. Welcome to the daily show. My name is jon stewart. Good one tonight. Great one tonight. Jennifer lopez is joining us tonight. First time on the program. [cheers and applause] a singer of note suggests a powerful controversy out of washington tonight. Beyonce may have lip synced the national anthem. This has never happened before where it was pretaped. Jon its worse than that. It may not have been...

You were the bathroom. I miss you so bad right now. I want to get inside you right now. I wanted to get to you before everybody else got out there and all these girls i dont even know are just in there peeing in you. I wanted to get in there alone. Im gonna be honest, i was just gonna go number one. While i was sitting there, i dont know, maybe kill two birds with one stone. [cheers, whistles applause] thats a missed connection thank you guys very, very much. Thank you very much. Captioning made possible by comedy central. Captioned by mccaptioning services www. Mccaption. Com [daily show them...

Stephen thats it for the report, everybody. Dont forget to see zero dark thirty by Kathryn Bigelow and captioning sponsored by Comedy Central from Comedy Centrals world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. cheers and applause jon welcome to the daily show. My name is jon stewart. The guest tonight, listen to this, settle down. Supreme court justice, thats right, today on the show, Supreme Court. Thank you very much Supreme Court Justice Sonnia Sotomayor cheers and applause unless i believe shes coming out here. Unless this is another elaborate hoax by manti t...