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captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) [crowd chanting stephen] ahoy, land lubbers. welcome to the reporrrrrrt! [laughter] thank ye fer joining us. forgive my grizzled visage and hollow, haunted eyes, for i have just sailed seven days on the heaving breast of cruel poisedon in the 2011 charrrrleston-to-bermuda yacht race! there i be at the helm. [laughter] now i know what lies beyond the horizon's salty veil. the buffeting winds, ravenous whales as long as twelve stout men laid head to heel. don't ask me how i know. [laughter] luckily, b...

( cheers and applause ) [crowd chanting stephen] ahoy, land lubbers. welcome to the reporrrrrrt! [laughter] thank ye fer joining us. forgive my grizzled visage and hollow, haunted eyes, for i have just sailed seven days on the heaving breast of cruel poisedon in the 2011 charrrrleston-to-bermuda yacht race! there i be at the helm. [laughter] now i know what lies beyond the horizon's salty veil. the buffeting winds, ravenous whales as long as twelve stout men laid head to heel. don't ask me how i know. [laughter] luckily, before i set sail, i steeled myself against the ocean's horrid ...

( cheers and applause ) [crowd chanting stephen] ahoy, land lubbers. welcome to the reporrrrrrt! [laughter] thank ye fer joining us. forgive my grizzled visage and hollow, haunted eyes, for i have just sailed seven days on the heaving breast of cruel poisedon in the 2011 charrrrleston-to-bermuda yacht race! there i be at the helm. [laughter] now i know what lies beyond the horizon's salty veil. the buffeting winds, ravenous whales as long as twelve stout men laid head to heel. don't ask me how i know. [laughter] luckily, before i set sail, i steeled myself against the ocean's horrid ...

[cheers and applause] >> jon: that's our show. join us tomorrow night at 11:00. here it is your moment of zen. >> what andrew was insinuating about him with young g captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh access.wgbh.org >> stephen: tonight, did the world end? could be -- a lot of places were closed yesterday. [laughter] then, my guest, author james stewart has a new book about lies, which i totally read. [laughter] i just spent seven days on a boat with no showers. so i'm not sure if this is a beard or barnacles. [laughter] this is "the colbert...

then, my guest, author james stewart has a new book about lies, which i totally read. [laughter] i just spent seven days on a boat with no showers. so i'm not sure if this is a beard or barnacles. [laughter] this is "the colbert report." ["the colb captioning sponsored by comedy central ( theme song playing ) ( cheers and applause ) [crowd chanting stephen] ahoy, land lubbers. welcome to the reporrrrrrt! [laughter] thank ye fer joining us. forgive my grizzled visage and hollow, haunted eyes, for i have just sailed seven days on the heaving breast of cruel poisedon in the 2011 charrrr...