seconds all at the same time. you know, in certain aspects it's every single second without my mom is a lifetime, but at the same time so much has happened in less than a year. so both. >> carlee, what about for you and your family. do you feel the same way about how painfully slow time can feel at moments and then the reverse at others? >> yes. it doesn't feel like it's been a year. this year has went by so fast. i can still, you know, picture me and vicki goofing off. the last time i spoke to her. i can still remember that time in my life. i can still remember hanging out with her, but at the same time it feels like nothing has been done since december 14th. more people have been killed. and in that aspect it's heart breaking because no change is being made. >> do you ladies focus on the --