hopefully get something for breakfast, hopefully get something for dinner. you're alive at the end of the day, and you want to get to the next day and go through that. and like in my case, you don't think about oh, i'm going to be here for 311 days because you don't know. you might be actually dead at the end of the first day. >> did you think every day you were going to die? i think most people -- none of us can understand what it must have been like. the claustrophobia, the fear, you don't understand what the people around you are saying. >> well, you never knew. the gang that i was with wanted money. so i was hopeful they would keep me alive trying to get the money. but you never knew what they were going to do. and from time to time they would take me out of the little room and have like a mock execution and say okay, we're going to kill you now. and they would after a while put me back down in the hole and put