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MGoPodcast 15.20: May the Romanovs Find Reason

1 hour and 44 minutes The Sponsors Thank you to Underground Printing for making this all possible. Rishi and Ryan have been our biggest supporters from the beginning. Check out their wide selection of officially licensed Michigan fan gear at their 3 store locations in Ann Arbor or learn about their custom apparel business at undergroundshirts.com. Our associate sponsors are: Peak Wealth Management, Matt Demorest - Realtor and Lender, Ann Arbor Elder Law, Michigan Law Grad, Human Element, Sharon's Heating & Air Conditioning, Venue by 4M where we recorded this, The Nose Bleeds, which is the Sklars Bros’ reboot of Cheap Seats on UFC Fight Pass, Autograph: Fandom Rewarded, who just launched an app where you earn rewards for things like reading MGoBlog and listening to this podcast, and introducing Champions Circle, the NIL fund keeping our team together. 1. The Final Coaching Staff Starts at 1:00 Jack Tuttle has been approved for a 7th year, does this incentivize you to switch over your offense since he's so different from Orji? Whoever the quarterback is, they just need to have a Cade McNamara year. Sabb hitting the portal is sad. The coaching staff is final (other than what's up with Mike Hart). The average age of this coaching staff is too close to Alex Drain. The Tennessee message boards are like "RHWRRRGHREWRGRR". Things seem to be moving positively on the NIL front. Michigan is losing assistants at a higher rate because if you succeed at Michigan you go to the NFL. [The rest of the writeup and the player after THE JUMP]

Tennessee , United-states , Alex-drain , Michigan , Ann-arbor , Cade-mcnamara , Mike-hart , Matt-demorest , Andy-reid , Travis-kelce , Bryan-mackenzie , Sklars-bro

Punt/Counterpunt: Rutgers 2019

Something's been missing from Michigan gamedays since the free programs ceased being economically viable: scientific gameday predictions that are not at all preordained by the strictures of a column in which one writer takes a positive tack and the other a negative one… something like Punt-Counterpunt. PUNT By Bryan MacKenzie@Bry_Mac A lot has changed in the 168 hours since we last spoke. I predicted a loss last week, but no one predicted that. We entered with the game with a vague foreboding, but we exited… well, actually, we didn’t exit. We got shoved, hard and ingloriously, into the Black Pit of Negative Expectations. And there we reside. [After THE JUMP: Let’s explore!]

Kansas , United-states , Illinois , Dallas , Texas , New-york , Ohio , Iowa , Spartan-stadium , Michigan , Jack-nicholson , Wesley-morris

1st and Bowl launches "Big Dill" pickleball tournament and league

Despite winter-like conditions, pickleball is still a big dill - especially at 1st and Bowl!

Bryan-mackenzie , Bowl-facebook ,

Punt-Counterpunt: The 2023 National Championship

Bama Links: Preview, The Podcast, FFFF Offense (chart), FFFF Defense (chart). SPONSOR NOTE. We still need your help to keep our team. Last year, Champions Circle® launched the One More Year Fund to support key Michigan players like Blake Corum, Trevor Keegan, and Zak Zinter who elected to return to Michigan for One More Year. Now, we’re launching the Those Who Stay NIL Campaign. Our rivals are coming after many of our key players, trying to induce them to leave Michigan. It's time for the Michigan Family to show our players how much we appreciate them and want them back in Maize and Blue! To keep the momentum going, please contribute now. ------------------------- Something's been missing from Michigan gamedays since the free programs ceased being economically viable: scientific gameday predictions that are not at all preordained by the strictures of a column in which one writer takes a positive tack and the other a negative one… something like Punt-Counterpunt. PUNT By Bryan MacKenzie@Bry_Mac Sometimes in the morning, I am petrified and can't moveAwake, but cannot open my eyesAnd the weight is crushing down on my lungs, I know I can't breatheAnd hope someone will save me this time - - - - - - - - I sit here like the rest of you. Not knowing how I feel, yet feeling it with uncomfortable, unyielding, unsustainable intensity. A million thoughts and nothing coherent to tie them together because AHHHHHH. I mean, look at the title of this post. Read it aloud. Picture tonight. Imagine toe meeting leather. Hear it in your mind. Now reduce that to words. Yeah, me neither. - - - - - - - - In August of 2009, on the heels of the worst season of Michigan football in living memory, MGoBlog put together a somewhat atypical preseason hype video, set to Rilo Kiley’s “A Better Son/Daughter.” The gist of it was, “yes, that sucked, but it will get better.” (As if any Michigan fan could forget how THAT season went, the fact that a similar video set to the same song was created the following year should remind you.) A Better Son/Daughter might seem like an odd choice for a hype video. Aside from spending the first 100 seconds with nothing but melancholy vocals and an organ accompaniment, the lyrics detail the struggles of a person battling bipolar disorder and trying to find happiness, knowing that the highs and the lows will never truly be separable. In the post explaining the editorial thought process, Brian explained: “in desperation there's that shred of hope; people who are down and not desperate are resigned. I could be ignorant or desperate.” [After THE JUMP: Sometimes when you’re on.]

Houston , Texas , United-states , Washington , Ohio , Michigan , Alabama , Cotton-bowl , Bryan-mackenzie , Mason-graham , Chris-fowler , Roman-wilson

Punt-Counterpunt: The Rose Bowl

Bama Links: Preview, The Podcast, FFFF Offense (chart), FFFF Defense (chart). Primer on Alabama switch D. Something's been missing from Michigan gamedays since the free programs ceased being economically viable: scientific gameday predictions that are not at all preordained by the strictures of a column in which one writer takes a positive tack and the other a negative one… something like Punt-Counterpunt. PUNT By Bryan MacKenzie@Bry_Mac If you hang out in Michigan Internet circles long enough, you’ll come to the conclusion that everyone has a favorite random astrophysics fact. The kind of thing you’ll throw out at parties or social gatherings with the slightest provocation. Things like “the observable Universe is 93 billion light years across despite being only 13.7 billion years old” or “the atmosphere of a neutron star is 4 inches high” or “because of gravitational lensing we once watched the same supernova four times over the course of several months.” Now, some of you will say this is nerdy, to which, shut up. My current favorite astrophysics factoid is this: it takes sunlight eight minutes to reach Earth from the surface of the sun… but it takes that same sunlight thousands and thousands of years to escape heart of the sun and reach its surface. You read that right. Light is generated in the core of the sun, and when it travels, it travels at the speed of light. But the core is astonishingly dense, and as a result the photons keep, in scientific terminology, bumping into shit. So they keep getting reabsorbed and reemitted in random directions, over and over again, like a caffeinated toddler in the world’s largest house of mirrors, until it happens to stumble upon an exit. Bottom line: the light you’re seeing right now is the result of the fusion of two hydrogen atoms into a helium atom millennia ago. Photon escaping the sun, or Semaj Morgan touchdown run? [After THE JUMP: Photons ranked by luck.]

Alabama , United-states , Michigan , Georgia , Texas , Brian-scalabrine , Ryan-day , Kris-jenkins , Russell-ackoff , Bryan-mackenzie , Blake-corum , Nigel-franks

Punt-Counterpunt: The Big Ten Championship 2023

Iowa Links: Preview, The Podcast, FFFF Offense (chart), FFFF Defense (chart). Iowatch Episodes 13, 12, 11, 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2 Something's been missing from Michigan gamedays since the free programs ceased being economically viable: scientific gameday predictions that are not at all preordained by the strictures of a column in which one writer takes a positive tack and the other a negative one… something like Punt-Counterpunt. PUNT By Bryan MacKenzie@Bry_Mac Today, we lose something beautiful. Something pure. Something unsullied by outside world and the excesses of modernity. A testament to a bygone era, when men wore flannel and donned massive mustaches, coffee was black, modems said BeeeeebBaBoopBabDingDingDingEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHH, and punting was winning. Before the clock strikes midnight tonight, the Big Ten West will cease to exist. The addition of Washington, Oregon, USC and UCLA gave the conference no choice but to abandon the concept of divisions, and to instead adopt a "whatever dogpile arrangement yields the biggest television ratings" structure. Likewise, the structure of the conference championship game will fundamentally change. Everyone will be thrown in the same pot of Hormel chili, with the expectation that the best two teams will emerge by the end of the season and play in Indianapolis (or Chicago or Vegas or Qatar or the deck of the U.S.S. Nimitz or the moon). [After THE JUMP: an otterbox.]

Westchester , Ohio , United-states , Wisconsin , Ann-arbor , Michigan , Washington , Nebraska , Oregon , Iowa-city , Iowa , China

Punt-Counterpunt: The Game 2023

Ohio State Links: Preview, The Podcast, FFFF Offense (chart), FFFF Defense (chart). Something's been missing from Michigan gamedays since the free programs ceased being economically viable: scientific gameday predictions that are not at all preordained by the strictures of a column in which one writer takes a positive tack and the other a negative one… something like Punt-Counterpunt. PUNT By Bryan MacKenzie@Bry_Mac As a bit of a Thanksgiving family tradition, the kids and I were watching Home Alone the other night (and yes, for those of you who haven’t seen it, SPOILERS AHEAD). We got to the part where the family is still on their front porch, when Uncle Frank remarks that their flight—an INTERNATIONAL flight, mind you—takes off in 45 minutes. And I, as a Dad Who Has Traveled, made the obligatory snorting sound that says, “buddy you ain’t making that flight.” The derision only increases, of course, as the family sprints untouched through O’Hare Airport like Donovan Edwards through Ohio Stadium, and are then allowed onto the plane without the gate agent counting either the tickets OR the passengers. Hell, she doesn’t even LOOK at the tickets. A wealthy-looking white dude just arrives with a pile of ticket-sized papers and a pile of humans, and everyone just agrees, “well everything seems to be in order here.” And then she says… AND I QUOTE… “take whatever’s free.” [After THE JUMP: Peanut butter jelly with a baseball bat.]

Ohio , United-states , Virginia , Ohio-stadium , New-york , Ann-arbor , Michigan , Colorado , Singapore , Oregon , Kansas , Oklahoma

Punt-Counterpunt: Maryland 2023

Maryland Links: Preview, The Podcast, FFFF Offense (chart), FFFF Defense (chart). Something's been missing from Michigan gamedays since the free programs ceased being economically viable: scientific gameday predictions that are not at all preordained by the strictures of a column in which one writer takes a positive tack and the other a negative one… something like Punt-Counterpunt. PUNT By Bryan MacKenzie@Bry_Mac Imagine it's last Saturday, and you're Sherrone Moore. Six years ago today, you were the Tight Ends coach for Central Michigan University, and you were preparing for a Tuesday night #MACtion game at Kent State in front of 5,580 people. Three years ago, you were the Tight Ends coach for a 1-2 Michigan team coming off Michigan's first loss to Indiana since the invention of the color Crimson, and you were probably polishing your resume on the not-so-off-chance your boss got fired. And yesterday, you were Michigan's Offensive Coordinator. But five hours ago, you were told, "you are now the head coach of the University of Michigan football team, effective as of RIGHT NOW." I know you've done this exactly once before, at home, against Bowling Green, with several weeks advance notice. But Michigan takes the field in State College, Pennsylvania today in front of 110,000 loud, angry people. This season—THE season—is in your hands. There is no elder statesman on the staff to guide you. It's all on you. Kickoff is in 90 minutes." "Go." [After THE JUMP: The players.]

College-park , Maryland , United-states , Iowa , Ohio , Happy-valley , Bowling-green , Pennsylvania , Central-michigan-university , Michigan , State-college , Illinois

Punt-Counterpunt: Penn State 2023

PSU Links: Preview, The Podcast, FFFF Offense (chart), FFFF Defense (chart). Something's been missing from Michigan gamedays since the free programs ceased being economically viable: scientific gameday predictions that are not at all preordained by the strictures of a column in which one writer takes a positive tack and the other a negative one… something like Punt-Counterpunt. PUNT By Bryan MacKenzie@Bry_Mac For the 20,653rd year in a row, the Dunning-Kruger Effect is having a banner year. The Dunning-Kruger Effect, of course, is the concept that those least competent in a certain subject area tend to overestimate their skills the most. The first recorded incident dates back to 18,630 BCE, when Krog disregarded the warnings of Gork, Selecter of Berries, stating, and I quote, "BAH, berry fine." Since then, the number of incidents of humans boldly asking the world around them, "what are you going to do, stab me?" has been, conservatively, 117 trillion. The beauty and comfort of the Dunning Kruger Effect is that 98% of the time, it doesn't matter. Almost no one who says, "yes, I could land a commercial airliner on an aircraft carrier at night" or "I could defeat a silverback gorilla in unarmed combat" are ever going to face those scenarios. There is also comfort in it; many of us spend most of our days consumed with the nuances of our specific jobs or fields, which sucks. You got promoted to Assistant Vice President for Color Administration last year, and you spend all day looking at light refraction spectrums and focus group comments and color trademark research. There are, like, a couple of hundred people in the world who understand your job, and four people in the world who are BETTER at your job than you. And sure, it's annoying when normal people look at your work and say, "yep, that's green," but you can likewise turn on a basketball game at the end of the day and say to no one in particular, "man, he should have made that shot" when a point guard misses a 16-footer with a hand in his face. [After THE JUMP: Gamification, and the poor pig.]

Ohio , United-states , Michigan , United-kingdom , Americans , British , Englishman , Britain , American , Bryan-mackenzie , Dunning-kruger , Charles-griffin

Punt-Counterpunt: Purdue 2023

Indiana Links: Preview, The Podcast, FFFF Offense (chart), FFFF Defense (chart). No-Name Defense Primer (video) Something's been missing from Michigan gamedays since the free programs ceased being economically viable: scientific gameday predictions that are not at all preordained by the strictures of a column in which one writer takes a positive tack and the other a negative one… something like Punt-Counterpunt. PUNT By Bryan MacKenzie@Bry_Mac James Hydrick was a “self-proclaimed psychic” who rose to prominence in the early 1980s as a guy who could perform super-simple acts of telekinesis, but skyrocketed in prominence when he got super mega dunked-upon on television for his obvious, obvious fraud. Hydrick went on the television show That’s Incredible! in 1980 and demonstrated his vast powers to… flip the pages of a phone book (located right in front of his face), and to rotate a pencil (located right in front of his face). The trick was so obvious that even host John Davidson pointed out that he could hear Hydrick blowing. And this was 1980, before the concept of skepticism had been invented. So when Hydrick got invited on a second show, the Bob Barker-hosted That’s My Line, to face a challenge from magician James Randi, he probably should have said no. Randi offered Hydrick $10,000 if he could perform the page-turning trick again. And this dude agreed. And then got body-slammed into the core of the Earth by my man Ambrose Burnside. [After THE JUMP: The people who demand to be taken seriously.]

Michigan , United-states , Ohio , Maryland , Happy-valley , Indiana , Ambrose-burnside , Sam-bankman , James-hydrick , Bryan-mackenzie , James-randi , John-davidson