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Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20170215

Why would i do that . I dont know, sir. Its not sexy. Uh, well, actually, what if the dance is more like, uh okay. Feel it. Feel it. You feel it. You just kind of feel it. Youre gonnaooh. Oh, theres something in my tummy. Its more groovin. Its groovin. Now its a baby. There it is. Fellas, is this some sort of joke . Because i consider myself a really chill dude, but you are pissing me off. Now, what happened to the guys who came up with the hunky specs commercial, huh . Look, you have every right to be angry. Please allow us a moment to discuss. No. What are we gonna do now . I dont know. I honestly thought my dancing was sexy. Gentlemen. Jean and louise strhol from strhols ice cream are here to see you. Strhols ice cream . We have been trying to get a meeting with them for months. This is huge. Where are they . I put them in the conference room. Son of a bitch. Crap. [phone ringing] hello, mother. Sheila, can you tell ned he has two clients waiting for him . Where are you two going .

Transcripts For COM Midnight With Chris Hardwick 20170215

Class nosel noCC 01702 q jacksonJackson 6, Jay 4, Los Angeles 4, Al 3, Valentine 3, Eric 2, Al Jackson 2, Chick 2, Mary Lyn 2, Hershey 2, Mary Lynn 2, Emily 2, Ivanka 2, Kelly Unfollow 1, Beyonce Kphreupbtu 1, Baa Baa 1, Valentine Post 1, Chevy 1, J. D. Power 1, Hashtag 1 Network Comedy Central Duration 00 31 01 Scanned in San Francisco, CA, USA Language English Source Comcast Cable Tuner Virtual Ch. 745 Video Codec h264 Audio Cocec ac3 Pixel width 1280 Pixel height 720 Audio Visual sound, color

Transcripts For COM The Daily Show 20170215

Why would i do that . I dont know, sir. Its not sexy. Uh, well, actually, what if the dance is more like, uh okay. Feel it. Feel it. You feel it. You just kind of feel it. Youre gonnaooh. Oh, theres something in my tummy. Its more groovin. Its groovin. Now its a baby. There it is. Fellas, is this some sort of joke . Because i consider myself a really chill dude, but you are pissing me off. Now, what happened to the guys who came up with the hunky specs commercial, huh . Look, you have every right to be angry. Please allow us a moment to discuss. No. What are we gonna do now . I dont know. I honestly thought my dancing was sexy. Gentlemen. Jean and louise strhol from strhols ice cream are here to see you. Strhols ice cream . We have been trying to get a meeting with them for months. This is huge. Where are they . I put them in the conference room. Son of a bitch. Crap. [phone ringing] hello, mother. Sheila, can you tell ned he has two clients waiting for him . Where are you two going .

Transcripts For COM Midnight With Chris Hardwick 20170215

Class nosel noCC 01702 q jacksonJackson 6, Jay 4, Los Angeles 4, Al 3, Valentine 3, Eric 2, Al Jackson 2, Chick 2, Mary Lyn 2, Hershey 2, Mary Lynn 2, Emily 2, Ivanka 2, Kelly Unfollow 1, Beyonce Kphreupbtu 1, Baa Baa 1, Valentine Post 1, Chevy 1, J. D. Power 1, Hashtag 1 Network Comedy Central Duration 00 31 01 Scanned in San Francisco, CA, USA Language English Source Comcast Cable Tuner Virtual Ch. 745 Video Codec h264 Audio Cocec ac3 Pixel width 1280 Pixel height 720 Audio Visual sound, color

Transcripts For KGO Jimmy Kimmel Live 20170217

Got some very good news today. For those of you who are looking to get off the planet. Anybody ready to go . Astronomers at the Carnegie Institution is discovered more than a hundred potential planets that may be habitable. Which means were one step closer to finding a planet with intelligent life. [ laughter ] its exciting. Especially, for members of the scientific community, this is on the level of like a woman brushing up against them on the subway exciting. This might not be the best time to make contact with aliens. They say, take us to your leader. What do we do at that time . Our leaders a little busy on twitter right now. How about we take you to oprah . Shes nice, youll like her. What a day it was in washington today. [ cheers and applause ] i know that many of you in our audience are here on vacation or whatever. But it might have been our craziest one yet. You know, there were demonstrations across the country today to protest the president S Immigration policy. Immigrants w

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