may have discovered the secret to time travel. Hear me out. We're currently seeing the Middle East unravel faster than Ilhan Omar's marriage to her brother. We're seeing inflation roaring back like that wrasse Kat got at Coachella. We're seeing absurd gas prices and a gas shortage. We're at the mercy of criminals trying to shut down a pipeline and a president who actually did shut one down. And speaking of, we have a bumbling leader who scares no one except young women who use Herbal Essence shampoo. Oh, he'll send a stern letter to our adversaries as long as it's before his 4:00 p.m. bedtime...