certain actions or reactions are going to be computed in a child's mind. so, the first thing i thought about was, was he emotionally -- did he come out of this life with us emotionally disturbed in some way? he didn't. i've asked him. >> some people would say that someone who had committed such horrible crimes must have had something horrible happen to them. you're saying just didn't happen? >> you know, i wish i had an answer. it's a terrible feeling to have this unending, unknown, why did this happen? what's the purpose of this happening, the horribleness that so many people have had to go