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And ive had my doubts in the past but i think this time shes serious. [ laughter ] President Trump spoke before the u. N. General assembly today. And i got to say, dude, whats going on with your face . [ laughter ] youre starting to look like the nailed it cake version of yourself [ laughter ] [ applause ] thats right President Trump spoke before the u. N. General assembly today. And to prove hes not a robot, he read a captcha. Lgbtq [ laughter and applause seth President Trump this morning denied reports that he withheld military aid from ukraine in order to pressure of the country to investi...

I dont know if i can handle all this fame. I mean, i always thought id want to be famous, but now that i am, i dont know if i like it. I mean, i probably cant even walk through this mall right now without people going, oh, my god, its the fingerbang guy oh, my god yeah, thats gonna suck. Yeah, i just want to be a normal kid again, have a normal life, and appreciate what i have. I think you boys are very smart for your age. Come on, ill buy you all an orange smoothie. I dont think they sell those anymore. Hey, cartman, do you think god is going to be mad at you for not making 10 million . Oh, s...

With my money and our time. Lemonis if i cant help them fix their process and their relationship. You guys picked this location. Chris yeah. Lemonis you guys did it. This board shop will have to board up its doors. My name is Marcus Lemonis, and i risk my own money to save struggling businesses. Were not gonna wake up every morning wondering if we have a job. Were gonna wake up every morning wondering how many jobs we have to do. Its not always pretty. Everythings gonna change everything. But i do it to save jobs, and i do it to make money. This. Lets go to work. Is the profit. Tony windward, ...

[ cheers and applause jimmy oh, my goodness. Thanks so much thank you. Please, please, have a seat. [ cheers and applause i love you i love you i appreciate it. Thank you very much. Sit down, relax. Welcome to the tonight show, everybody. Youre here and you made it. Im happy. [ cheers and applause you guys, my guest tonight is one of the alltime greats Sylvester Stallone is here [ cheers and applause backstage i asked him, can i get you something to drink water, soda . He was like, raw eggs. Steve really jimmy yeah [ laughter ] Sylvester Stallone is here i knew hed arrived in the billing when ...

Sort of technology that would damn it [ laughter ] while at the border, President Trump called the new fencing, quote, virtually impenetrable. But then again, he said the same thing after pushing on this for an hour. [ laughter ] theres no way through. [ light laughter ] canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is facing criticism after a photo from 2001 surfaced in which hes wearing brownface. Im not going to show you the picture because its really bad. Its so bad, that canadians traveling in europe are going to start telling people theyre american [ laughter ] what . [ cheers and applause sorr...