And when he says Something Like that, you know its true. And the president fired the crowd up sharing many tales of victories and he did that at the state of the union. On tuesday, i delivered my address on the state of the union. And i had somebody behind me, who was mumbling terribly, mumbling. Mumbling, wah, wah, ho, ha. Mumbling. Very distracting. Jimmy we did some digging, and we went through all the footage to figure out who was mumbling behind him, and i believe we found the culprit. Here, on this land, on this soil, on this continent. I love you, i love you, i love you. I love you. Jimmy its nice that they still have that spark after all this time together. As he often does, trump covered a wide range of subjects, including the time in 2017 when a man with a gun shot louisiana congressman steve scalise. Scalise was at the rally with trump. A very brave man. He took a bullet. He got shot. And he got up, he was going to die that night. I tell this story all the time. His wife, sh
The neighborhood which was a nice idea, clever idea, but as those of you who lined up on hollywood boulevard know, there has never been a beautiful anything in this neighborhood. [ laughter ] this neighborhood, this is where homeless spidermen gather to steal wallets from canadians. Thats what we do here. [ laughter ] a lot of the focus going into the show last night was on the lack of diversity. All the acting nominees but one were caucasian. And what do you do when you have a diversity problem . Well, you hit them with the worlds most famous white rapper, eminem. Thats what you do. [ laughter ] i actually learned a lot last night. For instance, that song from frozen 2, equally annoying in every language. [ laughter ] there were plenty of controversial moments. I think trump gained another 15 of the vote after those acceptance speeches last night. Bottom line, dont expect to see the joker doing a got milk commercial anytime soon. [ laughter ] the big winner last night was parasite. Th
Frozen 2, equally annoying in every language. [ laughter ] there were plenty of controversial moments. I think trump gained another 15 of the vote after those acceptance speeches last night. Bottom line, dont expect to see the joker doing a got milk commercial anytime soon. [ laughter ] the big winner last night was parasite. The movie won four oscars, including best picture. Parasite, if you havent seen it you should. Its very good. Is a south korean film that tells the story of a family who cons their way into a house they have no business living in and things go very wrong from there. The american version of it is called the trumps. [ laughter ] [ cheers and applause ] its also known as parasite. As well as tanning with just a bucket. Bong joon ho won best screenplay and best director. Its the first time a nonenglish language film won best picture. And the first time a guy named bong won anything other than a hackie sack contest. [ laughter ] this guy, he was the highlight of the ni
We will throw them by caucus. Were in whittle mode. Last night in New Hampshire, senator Bernie Sanders and Pete Buttigieg finished one and two. A very tight margin between them. That is turning out to be some matchup. An old jewish guy versus a young gay guy. Like an uncomfortable thanksgiving dinner. The media is eager to crown a winner, but the truth is, it takes like 2,000 delegates to win the nomination. Iowa and New Hampshire combined have 65, and neither state is demographically representative of anything but a Jimmy Buffett concert. Declaring a frontrunner at this point, its like picking a Plastic Surgeon via yelp reviews. Jennyp and the bigdave505 like him. But it was another disappointing night for joe biden who finished in fifth place and then had to hitchhike to South Carolina. Because hes not allowed to drive at night. But if you are, if you are joe biden, 77 years old, you lose New Hampshire to 78 year old Bernie Sanders, that has to feel like getting dumped by a woman an
Stanley cup or whatever . Well, today the president had one of those for himself. He invited himself to the white house for a big stack of cheeseburgers. If youve wondering what the president s mood would be after his acquittal yesterday, it was this. This is really not a news conference. Its not a speech. Its not anything. Its just were sort of its a celebration. Because we have something that just worked out. I mean, it worked out. We went through hell, unfairly. Did nothing wrong. Did nothing wrong. Ive done things wrong in my life, i will admit. Not purposely, but ive done things wrong. But this is what the end result is. [ cheers and applause ] you can take that home, honey, maybe well frame it. Jimmy donald trump is the only person who would celebrate almost being thrown out of the white house. [ laughter ] he ranted and raved for more than an hour this afternoon, airing every grievance, grinding every ax. It was his pettysburg address. [ laughter ] and he took shots at those he