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At the time, but so did having the word juicy spelled out on all of our butts. Right . Remember the early 2000s . And as twitter got bigger it became a place for serious conversations about our culture. Unfortunately, many of us put as much thought into our tweets about social justice issues as we did those quiznos toilet tweets. And those thoughts are now coming back to cancel us. What most of us didnt realize was that by posting every one of our thoughts on a whim, we were permanently linking our names to ideas that should have been taken as seriously as bathroom graffiti. And with everyone ...

I probably should have been. A long time ago. Ive said crazy things, but theyre all on comedy central, so no one can find them. If you want to cancel me, i think you actually have to buy a vcr on craigslist. Godspeed. I feel like if you guys did tune in to see jimmy and were surprised to see someone like me hosting instead, its probably like when guys are on a plane and see a female pilot walk on board. At first, theyre like look at her go. Okay, yeah. We have a female pilot. How neat. Then as soon as they shut the door, theyre like, theres at least one man in there, right, to do the important...

Is he besties with the chinese bat that started it all . Heres how they looked when they were dining together. Not a pretty picture. The bat or shrimp primavera. And if dr. Fauci has so much integrity, then why is he working with these unscrupulous characters . Anthony fauci if it were up to him, we would all be alive. Im donald trump and i wish you were dead. Announcer its a late show with Stephen Colbert. Tonight, surgeon u. S. A. Plus stephen welcomes tom hanks, featuring jon batiste and stay homin. And now, live on tape from a safe distance, its Stephen Colbert stephen what do you think ab...

A little bit and kind of clear my head over this long, stressful week its also kind of great to embrace the quiet and embrace yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Jimmy all new tonight show, at home edition starts now. [ laughter ] you have lost youre upside down youre upside down jimmy hi, everybody. What a long week its kind of been but thank you so much for tuning in and watching our show and giving to all these great charities. A couple people have asked if i am giving to these charities as well and, yes, my family is donating to every charity that weve mentioned so far during these shows. And thank yo...

Was still there. During an oval office event yesterday, President Trump called the coronavirus the invisible enemy, and said he views the virus like a war in other words, safely from thousands of miles away. Thats right, President Trump called the coronavirus the quote, invisible enemy. But to be fair, thats also what he calls the little piece of lettuce they try to hide in his burgers. Nice try, invisible enemy. After declaring yesterday National Nurses day, President Trump met with a group of nurses in the Oval Office Said trump, i just want you guys to know, you are my favorite category. Ge...