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sometimes you see an awesome preview for a movie you know is horrible, but you want to find out how it ends. well, now you don t have to, because i love watching awful movies. i ll tell you how they re gonna end in a new segment we re calling spoiler alert. this week s film is an underrated little gem called orphan. i gotta tell you, this thing had me at frame one. now, they don t adopt this crazy chick till about 45 minutes in. yeah, she s just up in the attic. she s painting. she can paint really well. oh, the mom s a great pianist too. did i mention they have a deaf daughter? they have a deaf daughter. kids who hang out with adults are [bleep] freaks. and they become instant best friends. we re best friends. i ll learn sign language. how long should that take? apparently like a half a day. and the dad s like, oh, i don t believe you, woman, that i ve known my entire life. i believe this girl that we just met. she never wants to go to the dentist either. she s l ....
2013, edition. first up. close to home, new york city elected world s tallest human bill de blasio, as the mayor de blasio campaigned on progressive platform of economic disparity and economic diversity. this takes time. . jon: holy [bleep] lock your doors. la revolution one has begun. de blasio won in a blowout crushing his opponent joe lhota by 49 percentage points at which point lhota was swol owed up by angry zombies. somebody get the guy an apple bus, the yellow pages to stand on? meanwhile in virginia governor race, terry mccallive struck a below for corrupt government by defeating tea party archetype and noted sodomy opponent ken you re only allowed to stick in in the cuch, cucchinelli in new jersey governor cristie cruised to a re-election win over his opponent random de dem democrat, nobody really knows. christie celebrated by weirding everybody out. tonight first and foremost i want to say thank you, new jersey, for making me the lummiest guy in the wor ....
our guests tonight shall we re excited about this from the hill aruous television program key and peele, we have keele and pee on the show tonight. chors plaus. jon: lucky was farsd, man, those dudes are funny. if you are anything like me, you can t digest milkment but also (laughter) you watch a lot of television news. and if you do you might have noticed the question that is increasingly on the med why s mind. was this racist? an alabama sorority accused of rejecting a candidate because she s black. to smear an entire segment of the population, are they racist? race, is race an issue here? was race a factor? are you racist? am i a racist? (laughter) jon: never ask a question you don t know the answer to. (laughter) the media they are just askinging they don t know. everything is happening, they are just passengers on this crazy bus called news. (laughter) fear not, for tonight we settle the investigationing questions with our brand-new segment, raci ....
you that. police say there is no connection with the family and the shooting. roamero says there is a school at the end of the street. police continue to investigate, the family has received numerous calls and e mails from people who want to help. the family has now set up a crowd funding account through you caring.com. her mother says dominique was working to save money to buy presents for christmas. this happened and the family was in the process of decorating the tree. now, if you want to help we have a link to the web site on our web site. thank you, leanne. following developing news where a judge ruled in favor of a family of a 13-year-old on life support. jahi mcmath has been in the hospital since monday when her tonsillectomy went wrong. nick? today, that family was given a glimmer of hope because the judge ordered a trl saying there should be additional testing. i m holding a copy of the p.r.o.signed by the judge, so fresh he wasn t had a chance to sig ....
now we re an army of our own. i can t guarantee you will live, but i can guarantee before this is is over the winner of the console wars will be decided. our new leader has joined us to make sure the system is the ps4. all hail the princess the princess. captioning sponsored by comedy central from comedy central s world news headquarters in new york, this is the daily show with jon stewart. (cheers and applause) jon: welcome to the daily show, my name is jon stewart. thank you for joining us. our guests tonight shall we re excited about this from the hill aruous television program key and peele, we have keele and pee on the show tonight. chors plaus. jon: lucky was farsd, man, those dudes are funny. if you are anything like me, you can t digest milkment but also (laughter) you watch a lot of television news. and if you do you might have noticed the question that is increasingly on the med why s mind. was this racist? an alabama sorority accused of rejecting ....