and now, our and now, our series. this is a headline every week for families across america. making decisions how to care for aging parents. so often adult children get caught in the emotions and the exhaustion, but there is help. and here's deborah roberts. >> reporter: for 50 years, j.r. gardner was a pillar of strength to his six children. >> dad would call every child, every weekend. every saturday, we knew we were getting a call from dad. >> reporter: then, in 2009, at age 82, he suffered a debilitating stroke. that pillar now needed his children's strength. >> our lives turned upside down july 5th. >> reporter: suddenly, another blow. their 82-year-old mom, virginia, was diagnosed with breast cancer. it was a tidal wave the brothers and sisters never saw coming. >> we were going 90 miles an hour. amy and ann in california taking care of dad. j.p. and i are checking out facilities in atlanta. we're calling my sister in mississippi, trying to touch